1 00:00:02,404 --> 00:00:04,543 ♪ It seems today that all you see ♪ 2 00:00:04,610 --> 00:00:07,716 ♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪ 3 00:00:07,782 --> 00:00:11,489 ♪ But where are those good old‐fashioned values ♪ 4 00:00:11,557 --> 00:00:14,495 ♪ On which we used to rely? ♪ 5 00:00:14,563 --> 00:00:18,169 ♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪ 6 00:00:18,236 --> 00:00:21,342 ♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ 7 00:00:21,409 --> 00:00:22,913 ♪ All the things that make us ♪ 8 00:00:22,979 --> 00:00:24,315 ♪ Laugh and cry ♪ 9 00:00:24,382 --> 00:00:30,127 ♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪ 10 00:00:37,341 --> 00:00:38,341 Well, here we are. 11 00:00:38,443 --> 00:00:40,915 Oh, and if you hear the guys call me "Poopy Thumb," 12 00:00:40,982 --> 00:00:42,284 I‐it's just a fun nickname, 13 00:00:42,351 --> 00:00:43,864 it's not something that actually happened. 14 00:00:43,888 --> 00:00:45,625 Hey, Poopy Thumb. 15 00:00:45,692 --> 00:00:48,430 It was Gulden's Spicy Brown Mustard from my sandwich. 16 00:00:48,496 --> 00:00:49,676 How many times do I have to say it?! 17 00:00:49,700 --> 00:00:50,735 Okay. 18 00:00:50,802 --> 00:00:54,008 No need to relitigate what four of our peers saw. 19 00:00:54,075 --> 00:00:55,545 Hi, everyone. 20 00:00:55,612 --> 00:00:57,782 I'm your children's teacher, Miss Laura, 21 00:00:57,849 --> 00:01:00,622 and like pretty much everyone in America right now, 22 00:01:00,688 --> 00:01:05,163 I'm very high on legalized edible pot. 23 00:01:05,230 --> 00:01:08,403 Ha‐ha. 24 00:01:08,470 --> 00:01:13,413 It's crazy how much your kids look like you. 25 00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:14,783 Wha... 26 00:01:14,850 --> 00:01:16,587 Peter, pay attention. 27 00:01:16,654 --> 00:01:18,991 Sorry, I was having a Fast Times daydream 28 00:01:19,058 --> 00:01:20,862 about that tank top mom. 29 00:01:20,928 --> 00:01:22,331 Yeah, that's disgusting. 30 00:01:22,398 --> 00:01:24,468 How would you like it if she did that to you? 31 00:01:36,492 --> 00:01:37,762 I chocked on water 32 00:01:37,829 --> 00:01:40,568 and had to get mouth‐to‐mouth from a guy. 33 00:01:43,006 --> 00:01:44,843 Five, four, 34 00:01:44,910 --> 00:01:47,916 three, two, one... 35 00:01:47,982 --> 00:01:49,218 Yay! 36 00:01:49,285 --> 00:01:50,988 All right, that's officially 37 00:01:51,055 --> 00:01:53,326 the latest any of us have ever been up. 38 00:01:53,393 --> 00:01:54,996 ‐ ‐Oh‐ho! 39 00:01:55,063 --> 00:01:56,600 A little tired, Stewie? 40 00:01:56,667 --> 00:01:58,938 No. I just yawned because somebody else yawned. 41 00:01:59,004 --> 00:02:00,608 I could do this all night. You tired? 42 00:02:00,675 --> 00:02:02,746 Oh, no. At home, they call me the night... 43 00:02:07,822 --> 00:02:09,258 Is Garrick Utley alive? 44 00:02:09,325 --> 00:02:11,462 I... I don't know, Peter. 45 00:02:11,530 --> 00:02:13,433 Hey, I've been meaning to ask you all night‐‐ 46 00:02:13,501 --> 00:02:16,439 those vintage pants are amazing, where did you get them? 47 00:02:16,507 --> 00:02:19,378 Oh, they were folded neatly on a toilet in the gas station. 48 00:02:19,445 --> 00:02:21,058 Hey, you know, we're starting a text chain 49 00:02:21,082 --> 00:02:22,786 with some of the other young parents. 50 00:02:22,852 --> 00:02:23,852 Young parents? 51 00:02:23,921 --> 00:02:26,392 Yeah, new parents like us have to stick together. 52 00:02:26,459 --> 00:02:27,929 Yes, we do. 53 00:02:27,996 --> 00:02:29,599 Because we're very young. 54 00:02:29,666 --> 00:02:31,002 Great. Can we get your number? 55 00:02:31,068 --> 00:02:32,705 Sure. We're Lakeside 4‐7... 56 00:02:32,772 --> 00:02:35,477 He's kidding. We'll hit you with the digits. 57 00:02:35,545 --> 00:02:37,014 Great. 58 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:39,485 Oh, my God, Peter, did you hear that? 59 00:02:39,553 --> 00:02:41,590 What? I'm chewing celery. I can't hear anything. 60 00:02:41,657 --> 00:02:43,861 They think Stewie's our first. 61 00:02:43,928 --> 00:02:45,497 Ah! They think we're young. 62 00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:47,836 - You're hurting me. - This is our chance. 63 00:02:47,902 --> 00:02:49,405 Our chance to break away 64 00:02:49,471 --> 00:02:51,510 from the Joes and Bonnies of the world. 65 00:02:51,577 --> 00:02:53,714 Our chance to finally make cool friends. 66 00:02:53,781 --> 00:02:55,126 Well, I don't know what you're saying, Lois, 67 00:02:55,150 --> 00:02:58,022 but that horse is the dumbest horse 68 00:02:58,089 --> 00:03:00,293 I have ever seen in my life. 69 00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:01,730 It hurt to hear, 70 00:03:01,797 --> 00:03:05,403 but deep down, I respected him for saying it. 71 00:03:05,470 --> 00:03:07,709 Finally someone had told me the truth. 72 00:03:07,775 --> 00:03:11,482 And that boy grew up to have a multiplatinum recording career. 73 00:03:11,550 --> 00:03:13,621 Hi, I'm Richard Marx, 74 00:03:13,687 --> 00:03:16,025 and I suck at making clay horses, 75 00:03:16,092 --> 00:03:18,931 but ask your wife if she cares. 76 00:03:18,998 --> 00:03:21,536 ♪ Wherever you go ♪ 77 00:03:21,603 --> 00:03:23,974 ♪ Whatever you do ♪ 78 00:03:24,041 --> 00:03:27,080 ♪ I will be right here ♪ 79 00:03:27,147 --> 00:03:29,986 ♪ Waiting for you. ♪ 80 00:03:38,469 --> 00:03:40,373 Oh, my God, it's from Matt and Kate 81 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:41,440 on that text chain. Uh, 82 00:03:41,710 --> 00:03:45,785 "Heading out for 'ritas downtown with the other young parents. 83 00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:47,421 Meet in 15?" 84 00:03:47,487 --> 00:03:49,559 Oh, Peter, we have to go! 85 00:03:49,626 --> 00:03:50,962 Now? 86 00:03:55,972 --> 00:03:57,040 Peter, look. 87 00:03:57,107 --> 00:03:59,111 The menu doesn't have dollar signs. 88 00:03:59,178 --> 00:04:01,415 It just has a number and a period. 89 00:04:01,482 --> 00:04:03,319 Ah! I feel like I'm in Brooklyn! 90 00:04:03,386 --> 00:04:05,791 Damn it, all the employees are wearing regular clothes, 91 00:04:05,858 --> 00:04:08,062 so it's impossible to ask anybody for help. 92 00:04:13,106 --> 00:04:14,709 Griffins. 93 00:04:15,544 --> 00:04:17,615 Uh, you want to sit at the high‐seat low‐table, 94 00:04:17,682 --> 00:04:19,051 or the low‐seat high‐table? 95 00:04:21,489 --> 00:04:23,226 How about those four old barber chairs 96 00:04:23,292 --> 00:04:26,165 around the operating tables from the state insane asylum? 97 00:04:26,232 --> 00:04:27,902 Ah, isn't this place great? 98 00:04:27,969 --> 00:04:28,971 Amazing. 99 00:04:29,038 --> 00:04:31,175 Hi, my name is Isaac. I'll be your server. 100 00:04:31,242 --> 00:04:32,578 Have you all eaten with us before? 101 00:04:32,645 --> 00:04:34,716 No, but I get how restaurants work. 102 00:04:34,783 --> 00:04:36,887 Now, what can I get for you, hon? 103 00:04:39,926 --> 00:04:41,596 Well, this is us. 104 00:04:41,663 --> 00:04:43,767 Boy, I almost don't want this night to end. 105 00:04:43,834 --> 00:04:45,871 - Me either. - Well, I got an idea. 106 00:04:45,938 --> 00:04:48,476 You mind if I use your bathroom to do number two? 107 00:04:48,544 --> 00:04:51,716 Wow, your place is amazing. 108 00:04:51,783 --> 00:04:55,156 A pool, a spa, and all the lights are on dimmers. 109 00:04:55,223 --> 00:04:57,528 And a digital thermostat. 110 00:04:57,595 --> 00:04:59,666 Oh, my God, it's like we're on a spaceship. 111 00:04:59,732 --> 00:05:02,605 Well, there's an open unit if you guys are interested. 112 00:05:02,672 --> 00:05:05,043 ‐ ‐Is the toilet a bit better in that one? 113 00:05:05,110 --> 00:05:06,188 Actually, it's kind of embarrassing, 114 00:05:06,212 --> 00:05:07,615 but the toilet in that one is shaped 115 00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:09,118 like a Hungry Hungry Hippo. 116 00:05:18,202 --> 00:05:19,739 I don't know, Peter. 117 00:05:19,806 --> 00:05:22,410 It just doesn't feel like the responsible thing 118 00:05:22,477 --> 00:05:24,248 to abandon Chris and Meg. 119 00:05:24,314 --> 00:05:27,420 The polka dot top goes with the white bottoms, too, right? 120 00:05:27,487 --> 00:05:29,526 Oh, definitely. Very old Hollywood. 121 00:05:29,592 --> 00:05:32,532 Perfect. I mean, I guess they are teenagers. 122 00:05:32,598 --> 00:05:35,771 - And helicopter parents, right? - What? 123 00:05:35,838 --> 00:05:37,975 Helicopter parents. It's something I read. 124 00:05:38,042 --> 00:05:39,679 - Oh. - Now you say it. 125 00:05:39,746 --> 00:05:41,783 ‐Say what? 126 00:05:41,850 --> 00:05:44,789 - Helicopter parents. - Exactly. 127 00:05:47,427 --> 00:05:50,668 Now, I stocked the freezer with plenty to eat while we're gone. 128 00:05:50,734 --> 00:05:53,707 - On the top shelf... - But all I heard was... 129 00:05:53,774 --> 00:05:57,013 Not pizza. Not pizza. Not pizza. 130 00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:59,519 And finally, this is calamari. 131 00:05:59,586 --> 00:06:01,756 This is my placenta. Are you listening? 132 00:06:01,823 --> 00:06:03,492 You're gonna want to watch where I point. 133 00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:06,232 - Calamari, placenta. - Who died again? 134 00:06:06,298 --> 00:06:09,438 Meg, listen to the lies. Nobody died. 135 00:06:09,505 --> 00:06:12,612 An aunt of your father's or mine is very ill. 136 00:06:12,678 --> 00:06:14,248 And why is Stewie going with you? 137 00:06:14,314 --> 00:06:15,918 Stewie loved Uncle Grandpa. 138 00:06:15,985 --> 00:06:17,688 Wait, uncle? I thought you said... 139 00:06:17,755 --> 00:06:19,926 Helicopter parents. Let's go, Lois. 140 00:06:25,069 --> 00:06:27,642 Wow, they're really gone. 141 00:06:27,708 --> 00:06:29,679 You know what that means. 142 00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:31,816 We can finally crate Brian! 143 00:06:31,883 --> 00:06:36,025 He tricked us, and we're still waiting on that lasagna. 144 00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:38,029 Chris, that was the trick. 145 00:06:38,095 --> 00:06:39,164 Oh. 146 00:06:39,231 --> 00:06:40,868 He tricked us! 147 00:06:45,376 --> 00:06:47,581 Ah, look, we're in apartment 4G. 148 00:06:47,648 --> 00:06:48,850 Like the iPhone. 149 00:06:48,917 --> 00:06:51,021 That's stupid, Lois. Don't ever say that again. 150 00:06:51,088 --> 00:06:53,560 Hey, how's everything going in there? 151 00:06:53,627 --> 00:06:56,131 -Great. We're in apartment 4 -G, like the iPhone. 152 00:06:56,198 --> 00:06:57,802 That's so twisted. 153 00:06:57,868 --> 00:06:59,572 - Did you make that up? - Yes. 154 00:06:59,639 --> 00:07:01,943 You guys get settled, then a few of us are gonna sit 155 00:07:02,010 --> 00:07:04,615 by the firepit and say "mid‐century modern" a lot, 156 00:07:04,682 --> 00:07:06,151 if you want to join. 157 00:07:06,218 --> 00:07:08,456 - They like us. - This is it, Peter. 158 00:07:08,523 --> 00:07:10,761 We're gonna vape. We're gonna vape! 159 00:07:10,828 --> 00:07:13,934 It's causing deaths, but not that many yet. 160 00:07:18,042 --> 00:07:21,983 Ugh, I can't believe I ate both Tupperwares of calamari. 161 00:07:24,121 --> 00:07:25,289 But I'm still hungry. 162 00:07:25,356 --> 00:07:26,726 What do we have left to eat? 163 00:07:26,793 --> 00:07:27,938 I'm not gonna say we're out of food, 164 00:07:27,962 --> 00:07:31,770 but anything still in the fridge I have made love to. 165 00:07:31,836 --> 00:07:35,611 Man, this broom‐handle‐poked tapioca is delicious. 166 00:07:35,677 --> 00:07:37,581 - Chris had sex with that. - 167 00:07:37,648 --> 00:07:40,854 - Relax, I didn't finish. - Oh. 168 00:07:49,705 --> 00:07:51,976 All right, Stewie, you have a playdate 169 00:07:52,043 --> 00:07:55,049 with Cobain, Siddhartha and Atticus. 170 00:07:55,116 --> 00:07:58,255 And if anyone asks, you have plenty of sunscreen on. 171 00:07:58,322 --> 00:08:00,761 - But I don't... - Bye. 172 00:08:00,828 --> 00:08:03,499 Hey, I'm Cobain. Want a strawberry Quik? 173 00:08:03,567 --> 00:08:05,671 Sure, I want a strawberry, but what's the hurry? 174 00:08:05,737 --> 00:08:07,808 -Stewie Griffin, 4 -G, like the iPhone. 175 00:08:07,875 --> 00:08:10,814 Ha. I like you. Our deck needed a wild card. 176 00:08:10,881 --> 00:08:12,785 Cobain, now that you're my best friend, 177 00:08:12,852 --> 00:08:14,187 can I ask you a question? 178 00:08:14,254 --> 00:08:15,691 When is nap time? 179 00:08:15,757 --> 00:08:18,095 Because it's 2:15, and I'm about to collapse. 180 00:08:18,162 --> 00:08:19,030 Oh, we don't take naps. 181 00:08:19,097 --> 00:08:21,769 No naps? Well, then, when is bed time? 182 00:08:21,836 --> 00:08:22,638 Whenever. 183 00:08:22,705 --> 00:08:23,940 My God, when do you grow? 184 00:08:24,007 --> 00:08:26,813 - We don't. I'm six. - You're six? 185 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:29,919 - Why are you so small? - I only eat tofu and seaweed. 186 00:08:29,986 --> 00:08:33,025 - Nothing in a cage. - You've never had parakeet? 187 00:08:33,092 --> 00:08:34,160 No. Have you? 188 00:08:34,227 --> 00:08:37,200 No, but it looks really yummy in the cartoons. 189 00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:45,884 All right, Peter, we can't look like we don't belong, 190 00:08:45,951 --> 00:08:48,924 so when they ask you what you want to drink, just say 191 00:08:48,990 --> 00:08:53,432 - "Local. Micro. Brew." - Local. Micro. Brew. 192 00:08:53,499 --> 00:08:54,869 Local. Micro. Brew. 193 00:08:54,936 --> 00:08:56,639 Hey, Peter, what can I get you to drink? 194 00:08:56,706 --> 00:08:58,075 Give us a drop o' sherry, luv. 195 00:08:58,142 --> 00:09:00,046 - Peter! - I'm‐I'm sorry. I mean... 196 00:09:00,112 --> 00:09:02,250 Local. Micro. Brew. 197 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:10,266 Hi, we're Lois and Peter in 4G. 198 00:09:10,333 --> 00:09:11,803 I really like your green pants. 199 00:09:11,869 --> 00:09:14,609 Oh, thanks, I found them folded neatly on a toilet. 200 00:09:14,675 --> 00:09:17,615 I‐I mean, I... I only buy pants from companies 201 00:09:17,681 --> 00:09:20,052 that donate the same pair to a Third World country. 202 00:09:20,119 --> 00:09:23,627 Run home with these expired military condoms, Ndugu. 203 00:09:23,693 --> 00:09:25,229 Run and make sure they use them. 204 00:09:25,296 --> 00:09:27,601 -("Main Title (Golden Ticket/ -Pure Imagination)" playing) 205 00:09:33,847 --> 00:09:35,784 ‐ 206 00:09:57,761 --> 00:09:59,464 I found Mom and Dad. 207 00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:01,134 Wait, what? Where are they? 208 00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:03,506 Well, first I need to explain how I found them. 209 00:10:03,573 --> 00:10:05,009 Let me start from the beginning. 210 00:10:05,076 --> 00:10:07,113 You know how I operate a small Internet company 211 00:10:07,180 --> 00:10:09,384 where I buy and sell chlorine, right? 212 00:10:09,451 --> 00:10:11,789 ‐No. What? 213 00:10:11,856 --> 00:10:15,731 - Chris' Chlorine? - Chris, I have no idea what... 214 00:10:15,797 --> 00:10:17,433 Chris' Chlorine! 215 00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,070 Stop just yelling that! 216 00:10:19,137 --> 00:10:21,308 Well, anyway, my guy at Millennial Village 217 00:10:21,374 --> 00:10:24,949 Luxury Apartments was buying extra chlorine this week. 218 00:10:25,015 --> 00:10:27,253 Seems they've been finding a lot of loose burger meat 219 00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:28,322 in the pool. 220 00:10:28,388 --> 00:10:30,459 And who do we know that likes to go swimming 221 00:10:30,527 --> 00:10:31,896 with loose burger meat? 222 00:10:31,963 --> 00:10:35,102 - Oh, my God, Dad! - Bingo. 223 00:10:35,169 --> 00:10:37,206 But more importantly, are you satisfied 224 00:10:37,273 --> 00:10:39,210 with your chlorine supplier, Meg? 225 00:10:39,277 --> 00:10:41,114 Do you realize that most people don't have 226 00:10:41,181 --> 00:10:43,887 a personal relationship with their chlorine dealer? 227 00:10:43,953 --> 00:10:45,824 How crazy is that? 228 00:10:45,891 --> 00:10:47,336 Chris, we got to go to that apartment building 229 00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:49,097 - and bust Mom and Dad. - 230 00:10:49,164 --> 00:10:51,869 I'm on board, Meg, just got to take this call first. 231 00:10:51,936 --> 00:10:55,075 Christopher's Catamarans. Been running a side business. 232 00:10:55,142 --> 00:10:56,411 Hello? 233 00:10:56,478 --> 00:10:57,514 Aw, wrong number. 234 00:10:57,581 --> 00:10:58,883 Anyway, Meg, are you happy 235 00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:01,087 with your catamaran supplier? 236 00:11:03,258 --> 00:11:06,331 Shouldn't we be confronting our parents right now? 237 00:11:06,398 --> 00:11:09,872 I know, it's so crazy how they moved out of the house. 238 00:11:09,939 --> 00:11:11,909 But you know what's really crazy? 239 00:11:11,976 --> 00:11:14,982 Paying big showroom prices for catamarans. 240 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,988 Meg, do you want to pay for someone else's brick and mortar? 241 00:11:18,055 --> 00:11:20,326 Or do you want to pay for your own fun 242 00:11:20,392 --> 00:11:21,996 and freedom on the waves? 243 00:11:22,063 --> 00:11:24,133 - I really think that we should be getting back. - 244 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:27,006 Hang on, hang on. I got to get this call. 245 00:11:27,073 --> 00:11:28,910 Randy's Screen and Window Supply. 246 00:11:28,977 --> 00:11:30,547 That's not another one of my businesses. 247 00:11:30,614 --> 00:11:32,116 I run an answering service. 248 00:11:32,183 --> 00:11:34,153 Although I'd be remiss if I didn't mention 249 00:11:34,220 --> 00:11:37,460 that I am dying to get into the screen and window business. 250 00:11:37,527 --> 00:11:39,030 If you have an in, Meg, 251 00:11:39,097 --> 00:11:41,268 just anyone in the window game I could take to coffee, 252 00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:43,472 you know, and just pick their brains about win... 253 00:11:43,539 --> 00:11:45,911 No, Chris. I'm sorry, I don't. 254 00:11:45,977 --> 00:11:48,516 Yeah, no, it's cool. Sorry. I'm still here. 255 00:11:51,254 --> 00:11:54,828 Windows and Screens Unlimited, we beat any price. 256 00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:01,207 So, Griffins, 257 00:12:01,274 --> 00:12:04,848 what do you think of our little oasis in Quahog? 258 00:12:04,915 --> 00:12:06,115 I like it, but I can't believe 259 00:12:06,151 --> 00:12:07,955 we're all going to college next year. 260 00:12:08,021 --> 00:12:09,157 Peter, that's too young. 261 00:12:09,223 --> 00:12:11,227 I mean, have you gotten a reverse mortgage 262 00:12:11,294 --> 00:12:13,866 - like Joe Namath suggests? - Too old. 263 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:16,104 Hey, gang, there's a new couple moving in. 264 00:12:16,171 --> 00:12:18,509 Look at that, Lois. We're no longer the new couple. 265 00:12:18,576 --> 00:12:20,145 The heat is off. 266 00:12:23,118 --> 00:12:24,888 - Oh, my God. - I know. 267 00:12:24,955 --> 00:12:26,715 That's the guy from the catamaran commercial. 268 00:12:32,203 --> 00:12:35,342 So, you two just moved to the complex? 269 00:12:35,409 --> 00:12:37,881 What did you say your names were again? 270 00:12:37,948 --> 00:12:40,219 I'm Dylan and this is my wife, Dylan. 271 00:12:40,285 --> 00:12:43,358 Oh... same name couple. That's the dream. 272 00:12:43,425 --> 00:12:46,164 I have an idea, why don't we all play a board game? 273 00:12:46,231 --> 00:12:47,366 Great idea. 274 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:50,707 Have you guys ever played 275 00:12:50,774 --> 00:12:53,111 Twilight of Destruction? 276 00:12:53,178 --> 00:12:55,950 Wh‐What is that? Is that... is that like Sorry!? 277 00:12:56,017 --> 00:12:59,023 Um, does Sorry! have a 900‐sided die 278 00:12:59,090 --> 00:13:01,061 and its own language of rules? 279 00:13:01,127 --> 00:13:02,531 Oh, we love that game. 280 00:13:02,597 --> 00:13:05,102 Yeah, that sounds like fun. 281 00:13:05,169 --> 00:13:07,908 Why don't you guys set it up, and we'll get our new friends 282 00:13:07,974 --> 00:13:09,410 drinks from the kitchen, huh? 283 00:13:09,477 --> 00:13:12,116 What the hell do you guys think you're doing? 284 00:13:12,183 --> 00:13:14,955 I could ask you the same question, and I shall. 285 00:13:15,022 --> 00:13:17,226 What the hell do you guys think you're doing?! 286 00:13:17,293 --> 00:13:18,228 I'll tell you what we're doing‐‐ 287 00:13:18,295 --> 00:13:20,900 having fun for the first time in our lives. 288 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,379 And we're not gonna let you ruin that. 289 00:13:22,403 --> 00:13:25,442 Well, we're gonna expose you as the old farts you are. 290 00:13:25,510 --> 00:13:27,581 Oh, you're gonna expose us? 291 00:13:27,647 --> 00:13:28,649 Did you hear that, Peter? 292 00:13:28,716 --> 00:13:30,452 Don't care, long as you don't pan 293 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,323 no nuggets off me claim. 294 00:13:33,425 --> 00:13:35,195 I went way back. 295 00:13:39,738 --> 00:13:41,575 Okay, Peter, your turn. 296 00:13:41,642 --> 00:13:43,044 Uh... 297 00:13:43,111 --> 00:13:44,691 Why are you looking at your navigation chart 298 00:13:44,715 --> 00:13:45,995 when we're still at the beginning 299 00:13:46,050 --> 00:13:47,186 of the first build phase? 300 00:13:47,253 --> 00:13:49,992 You know what I like to do when I play games? 301 00:13:50,058 --> 00:13:51,996 Ask people when they were born. 302 00:13:52,062 --> 00:13:53,198 Pete, you go first. 303 00:13:53,265 --> 00:13:55,503 Oh, that's an easy question. 19... 304 00:13:58,008 --> 00:14:02,584 Uh, uh, nine... 90.90.11. 305 00:14:02,651 --> 00:14:04,453 I was born on 9/11. 306 00:14:04,521 --> 00:14:06,057 Well, what about you guys? 307 00:14:06,124 --> 00:14:08,128 You seem like a very happy couple, 308 00:14:08,195 --> 00:14:10,265 yet I haven't seen you even kiss yet. 309 00:14:10,332 --> 00:14:13,004 This is why I said we should've practiced. 310 00:14:13,071 --> 00:14:14,942 I can't kiss at the moment. 311 00:14:15,008 --> 00:14:17,313 I have raging HPV in my throat. 312 00:14:17,379 --> 00:14:20,219 Compliments of m'lady's Florida sojourn. 313 00:14:20,285 --> 00:14:22,991 What a fun Gen Z time we're having. 314 00:14:23,058 --> 00:14:24,360 We should take a photo. 315 00:14:24,427 --> 00:14:28,435 Lois, why don't you take a photo and AirDrop it to us? 316 00:14:30,439 --> 00:14:32,944 Of course, AirDrop. 317 00:14:33,011 --> 00:14:34,313 That's easy. 318 00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:37,186 Oh, whoops. 319 00:14:37,253 --> 00:14:39,056 Dropped my phone. 320 00:14:39,123 --> 00:14:41,461 Peter, can you help me pick this up? 321 00:14:42,263 --> 00:14:44,768 What the hell is AirDrop? Is that Wi‐Fi? 322 00:14:44,835 --> 00:14:47,249 - I think it's a medical term for a fart. - Is that the button you hit 323 00:14:47,273 --> 00:14:48,652 - on the plane? - I never turn it off on a plane. 324 00:14:48,676 --> 00:14:51,247 - How do you ask Siri? - I think you mean "celery." 325 00:14:51,314 --> 00:14:53,151 - Hey, celery. - It's definitely Siri. 326 00:14:53,218 --> 00:14:54,664 - Yeah, I'm wrong. - Peter, we got to get out of this. 327 00:14:54,688 --> 00:14:56,501 I'll‐I'll just throw up, everyone will have to leave. 328 00:14:56,525 --> 00:14:59,063 - Can you really do that? - Yeah, I taught myself in sixth grade. 329 00:14:59,130 --> 00:15:01,301 - I'm gonna do it. - Okay. Okay. I'm in. I'm in. 330 00:15:06,044 --> 00:15:07,514 Aw, gee whiz. 331 00:15:07,580 --> 00:15:10,152 Aw, sorry, guys. Looks like the party's over. 332 00:15:10,218 --> 00:15:12,356 We'll AirDrop another time. 333 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,003 Ah, Sunday. 334 00:15:19,070 --> 00:15:21,207 Perfect day to dangle my feet in the pool 335 00:15:21,274 --> 00:15:23,378 with the other heavier wives. 336 00:15:24,213 --> 00:15:27,654 Ah, loose burger meat on a sunny day. 337 00:15:28,789 --> 00:15:30,660 This is nice, isn't it, Beverly? 338 00:15:30,727 --> 00:15:32,296 Bev? Isn't it? 339 00:15:32,363 --> 00:15:34,066 - Uh‐huh. - Well, then say it. 340 00:15:34,133 --> 00:15:37,239 Uh, you guys, the Dylans just had the best idea. 341 00:15:37,306 --> 00:15:39,845 What do you say we all go to Quachella with a Q, 342 00:15:39,911 --> 00:15:42,049 Quahog's three‐day music festival? 343 00:15:42,116 --> 00:15:44,186 Oh, music festival, huh? 344 00:15:44,253 --> 00:15:46,023 You think the von Trapps'll stick around 345 00:15:46,090 --> 00:15:47,393 to pick up their award this time? 346 00:15:47,459 --> 00:15:50,165 I don't know about them, but they're gonna have holograms 347 00:15:50,232 --> 00:15:53,204 of Tupac and also Nipsey Hussle, who I'd never heard of 348 00:15:53,271 --> 00:15:55,275 and then was told to care immensely about. 349 00:15:55,342 --> 00:15:57,312 So, this was the Dylans' idea? 350 00:15:57,379 --> 00:15:59,150 Oh, oh, we can't take credit for it. 351 00:15:59,216 --> 00:16:00,596 Any young person would've thought of it. 352 00:16:00,620 --> 00:16:03,158 Do I have to wear a tuxedo like Frank and Sammy 353 00:16:03,224 --> 00:16:05,395 or is that just for the people on stage? 354 00:16:10,238 --> 00:16:12,677 Hey, Lois, will you snap a 'gram for us? 355 00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,451 So, the‐the button in the middle? 356 00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:19,089 Yeah, portrait mode. Slap on a Hudson filter. 357 00:16:19,156 --> 00:16:21,294 The‐the big button? Peter?! 358 00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:24,433 Lois, please, I'm doing my Charles in Charge word find. 359 00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:27,574 Now, where are those two Ds for "Buddy"? 360 00:16:38,161 --> 00:16:40,867 They‐they just left? 361 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:42,637 Huh. Thought you kids didn't take naps. 362 00:16:42,704 --> 00:16:44,875 Now you're all just sleeping at the bottom of the pool? 363 00:16:44,941 --> 00:16:46,812 Oh, my God! 364 00:16:55,596 --> 00:16:56,665 Guys, we're here. 365 00:16:56,732 --> 00:17:00,171 Yup, there's the local mosquito and gnat population, 366 00:17:00,238 --> 00:17:02,042 anxiously awaiting my arrival. 367 00:17:05,616 --> 00:17:08,656 All right, time for a fallen‐arch, flip‐flop 368 00:17:08,722 --> 00:17:10,593 two‐mile walk to the gate. 369 00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,654 Uhp, I got a leaf. 370 00:17:42,289 --> 00:17:44,493 ‐ 371 00:17:52,777 --> 00:17:55,148 Geez, we've been walking for 20 minutes. 372 00:17:56,250 --> 00:17:58,221 You guys can tap out any time. 373 00:17:58,287 --> 00:18:01,227 I know you both have searing IPA sun headaches. 374 00:18:01,293 --> 00:18:03,297 There's ibuprofen in my backpack. 375 00:18:03,364 --> 00:18:06,505 Admit you're old, and it's yours. 376 00:18:06,571 --> 00:18:08,207 No. Never. 377 00:18:08,274 --> 00:18:10,478 We're getting close. I can see the stages. 378 00:18:10,546 --> 00:18:13,484 Oh, there's nothing there. That's just a mirage. 379 00:18:18,896 --> 00:18:21,467 The porta potties are a mirage, too. 380 00:18:34,026 --> 00:18:36,497 Thanks for waiting, guys. I really had to go number one. 381 00:18:36,565 --> 00:18:38,434 Oh, my God, what are we doing? 382 00:18:38,502 --> 00:18:40,305 Peter just crapped in the parking lot. 383 00:18:40,371 --> 00:18:42,409 - We can't do this. - What's wrong? 384 00:18:42,476 --> 00:18:43,746 Are you guys not super amped? 385 00:18:43,812 --> 00:18:45,883 No! No, we're old! 386 00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,285 We hate this (bleep)! 387 00:18:47,352 --> 00:18:50,559 - W‐Well, this is a surprise. - Oh, shut up. 388 00:18:50,626 --> 00:18:53,364 And they're only teenagers, and not cool ones. 389 00:18:53,431 --> 00:18:54,834 If you two idiots weren't wearing 390 00:18:54,901 --> 00:18:58,675 terrible Warby Parker glasses, you would have seen that. 391 00:18:59,844 --> 00:19:00,679 - Oh, my God! - 392 00:19:00,746 --> 00:19:02,950 Look, we're sorry we lied to you. 393 00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:06,157 We thought it would be fun to act like young parents again. 394 00:19:06,223 --> 00:19:08,529 But you don't have kids to have fun. 395 00:19:08,595 --> 00:19:10,766 You have kids to use as an excuse 396 00:19:10,833 --> 00:19:12,235 to never leave the house. 397 00:19:12,302 --> 00:19:14,741 Can you guys at least Venmo us for the tickets? 398 00:19:14,808 --> 00:19:17,713 I don't know what that is! 399 00:19:17,780 --> 00:19:20,218 And that's okay. Ha. 400 00:19:20,285 --> 00:19:21,721 Chris, give us the ibuprofen 401 00:19:21,788 --> 00:19:23,992 and text the driver to pick us up here. 402 00:19:24,059 --> 00:19:26,463 I don't know how to do it. 403 00:19:26,531 --> 00:19:28,434 Are we done? Thank God. 404 00:19:28,502 --> 00:19:31,440 I'm gonna go get a water at that 7‐Eleven over there. 405 00:19:43,064 --> 00:19:45,001 Ugh, I ruined my pants. 406 00:19:48,909 --> 00:19:50,579 Circle of life. 407 00:19:56,490 --> 00:19:58,494 I hated every minute of this. 408 00:20:03,972 --> 00:20:07,345 Well, we had quite an adventure, but I think we learned 409 00:20:07,412 --> 00:20:09,817 a valuable lesson. Isn't that right, Chris? 410 00:20:09,884 --> 00:20:11,655 I don't know. I'd love to stay and talk, 411 00:20:11,721 --> 00:20:14,694 but I've got a catamaran client I got to check on. 412 00:20:18,702 --> 00:20:21,373 - Uh, what's going on? - Sorry, Chris. 413 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:23,912 There's a hungry new player in the catamaran game. 414 00:20:23,979 --> 00:20:27,753 While you were at Quachella, I was building relationships. 415 00:20:27,820 --> 00:20:30,091 That's all the catamaran business is, Chris‐‐ 416 00:20:30,158 --> 00:20:32,262 relationships. 417 00:20:32,329 --> 00:20:35,869 Losing my best client like that was a real epiphany for me, 418 00:20:35,936 --> 00:20:39,443 and I knew immediately 419 00:20:39,510 --> 00:20:43,184 I could give up or I could sneak into a Ramada Inn 420 00:20:43,250 --> 00:20:45,488 and wander up to an unguarded podium. 421 00:20:45,556 --> 00:20:47,492 I chose the latter. 422 00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:50,899 And it has made all the difference! 423 00:20:54,941 --> 00:20:56,143 ♪ Yeah ♪ 424 00:20:56,210 --> 00:20:58,815 ♪ Come on ♪ 425 00:20:58,882 --> 00:20:59,884 ♪ Whoo! ♪