1 00:00:02,627 --> 00:00:04,838 ♪ It seems today that all you see ♪ 2 00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:08,133 ♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪ 3 00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:11,720 ♪ But where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ 4 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:14,723 On which we used to rely? ♪ 5 00:00:14,723 --> 00:00:18,226 Lucky there's a family guy ♪ 6 00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:21,521 ♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ 7 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,106 All the things that make us ♪ 8 00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:24,524 Laugh and cry ♪ 9 00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:30,113 ♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪ 10 00:00:35,452 --> 00:00:36,661 {\an8}This is the shirt you chose? 11 00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:38,955 {\an8}Denim, with all the Warner Brothers characters 12 00:00:38,955 --> 00:00:40,123 {\an8}peeking out of the pocket? 13 00:00:40,123 --> 00:00:42,167 {\an8}Yeah, it's the fanciest shirt I have. 14 00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:45,128 {\an8}But Warner Brothers wouldn't license their actual characters. 15 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,505 {\an8}Eh, how are you, Doctor? 16 00:00:47,505 --> 00:00:49,215 {\an8}Oh, my God, will you look at this? 17 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:51,885 {\an8}Bonnie's latest post has 43 likes. 18 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:53,803 {\an8}That's tied for the record. 19 00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:59,392 {\an8}That's good, but it should say, "Pretty good view from here." 20 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:02,020 {\an8}No, no, no, it's because she's at the pier. 21 00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:05,231 {\an8}So... I love that. 22 00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:07,150 Damn it, Peter, 23 00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,152 {\an8}now she's got the Spooner Street record. 24 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:11,154 {\an8}Hang on, I'm texting Quagmire and Cleveland. 25 00:01:11,154 --> 00:01:12,322 {\an8}They gotta see this. 26 00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:21,039 {\an8}Hey, kids, I'm Mr. Andy, and I just invented 27 00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:23,333 {\an8}this really crazy game. 28 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:26,044 {\an8}One person hides in a top secret spot, 29 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:29,130 {\an8}and the others count to ten, then try and find him. 30 00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:31,925 {\an8}We'll call it, oh, I don't know, "hide-and-seek"? 31 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:35,011 {\an8}I say, one game covering covert activity, 32 00:01:35,011 --> 00:01:37,097 {\an8}surveillance and counting? 33 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:40,350 {\an8}I would follow this man into the very bowels of hell. 34 00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:42,185 {\an8}All right, who wants to hide first? 35 00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:43,978 {\an8}Oh, me, me. 36 00:01:43,978 --> 00:01:46,272 {\an8}Looks like we have our first little hider. 37 00:01:46,272 --> 00:01:49,734 {\an8}I'm so glad they didn't fire you for giving us baths. 38 00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:53,697 {\an8}Okay, it's time to bid on our final donated item of the night: 39 00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:56,408 {\an8}a romantic Vermont weekend getaway. 40 00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:57,992 Peter, we have to win. 41 00:01:57,992 --> 00:02:00,704 {\an8}Vermont is an Instagram goldmine. 42 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,372 {\an8}I could shatter Bonnie's record. 43 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:03,415 {\an8}Lois, we can't afford... 44 00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:04,916 {\an8}I'll take you to Ben & Jerry's. 45 00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:07,085 {\an8}I have $600 taped to my stomach. 46 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,378 {\an8}$600! 47 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:10,130 {\an8}Sold. There were no other bids. 48 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,632 {\an8}You could have had it for $40. 49 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:17,053 {\an8}That concludes this scene, ladies and gentlemen. 50 00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:25,520 {\an8}Chris, what-- Oh, who cares? 51 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:27,105 {\an8}We're in Vermont till Sunday. 52 00:02:27,105 --> 00:02:30,108 {\an8}Call if you have to but, like, let's not call. 53 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:32,277 {\an8}Can we only brush our teeth for 60 seconds 54 00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:33,903 {\an8}instead of the full 90? 55 00:02:33,903 --> 00:02:36,114 {\an8}You brush your teeth? Nerd. 56 00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:38,033 {\an8}And remember, kids, if you get nervous, 57 00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:40,535 {\an8}you can always turn on the home security system. 58 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:44,039 {\an8}That's right. The keypad code is 6969. 59 00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:45,373 {\an8}If your mother doesn't want to do it, 60 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:46,624 {\an8}at least she can type it. 61 00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:48,585 {\an8}You're a legend, Dad. 62 00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:54,507 {\an8}Hey, Brian, can you find me? 63 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:57,218 {\an8}What the-- Is that a talking blanket? 64 00:02:57,218 --> 00:02:59,346 {\an8}It's me. It's crazy, right? 65 00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,848 {\an8}It's this brand-new game called hide-and-seek. 66 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:04,601 {\an8}Basically a peekaboo on Flintstones Vitamins. 67 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:05,977 {\an8}- Let's play - Fine. 68 00:03:05,977 --> 00:03:07,812 {\an8}But like all adults, on my turns, 69 00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:10,440 {\an8}I'll only hide in beds so I can take little naps. 70 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,192 {\an8}I'll start counting. Go upstairs. 71 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,320 {\an8}Whoa, I never even thought about hiding upstairs. 72 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:17,781 {\an8}This is a game changer, like Twitch. 73 00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:21,534 {\an8}Normal voice. Playing Minecraft, quiet-normal. 74 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,453 {\an8}Loudest scream possible! 75 00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:26,498 {\an8}Kinda quiet, normal-quiet, Minecraft. 76 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:28,541 {\an8}Scorching-hot audio levels! 77 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,178 {\an8}Oh, my God. 78 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:43,765 {\an8}Pretty cool spot, eh, Bri? 79 00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:45,850 {\an8}Do all kids know what a good spot 80 00:03:45,850 --> 00:03:47,686 {\an8}a closed-door refrigerator is? 81 00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:50,146 {\an8}No. Don't ever hide in there. Could you even breathe? 82 00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:52,732 {\an8}No. It's a good thing you were looking for me. 83 00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:55,485 Stewie, no. Very bad. 84 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:56,986 What the hell was that? 85 00:03:56,986 --> 00:03:59,280 A spanking. That was me spanking you. 86 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,450 That's it? Brian, you either gotta be that guy 87 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,702 or-or not be that guy. 88 00:04:03,702 --> 00:04:06,621 I-I don't-- I don't know what that was. 89 00:04:18,633 --> 00:04:20,844 Oh, God, she did it again. 90 00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:22,137 - Who? - Bonnie. 91 00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:25,098 Every time I do a post, she does one right after. 92 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,808 - So what? - So what? 93 00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:29,394 It undercuts my post's popularity. 94 00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:31,855 Like Armageddon and Deep Impact. 95 00:04:31,855 --> 00:04:34,149 Oh, yeah, that was weird. 96 00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,693 Can you imagine you just wrapped principle shooting 97 00:04:36,693 --> 00:04:38,737 on Volcano, and you're very proud of it, 98 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:41,114 and then bam, here comes Dante's Peak? 99 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:42,323 One more and I'll get it. 100 00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:44,868 You've just finished a comprehensive retelling 101 00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:47,370 of early '70s middle-distance running in Oregon 102 00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:48,747 with Prefontaine, 103 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:50,415 and then boom, your Leto gets Crudup'ed 104 00:04:50,415 --> 00:04:53,418 by Without Limits. 105 00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:55,378 Sorry, I was tracking two ladies holding hands, 106 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:57,672 and they just kissed goodbye, so I've been elsewhere. 107 00:04:57,672 --> 00:05:01,426 Wha-What were you saying? Y-You like movies or something? 108 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:02,677 Ah, look at this. 109 00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:04,804 A glassblowing class. 110 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,640 That kind of crap is perfect for Instagram. 111 00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:19,069 Oh, I'm so beat. 112 00:05:19,069 --> 00:05:20,862 Me and Rupert played H&S-- 113 00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:22,155 quicker way to say hide-and-seek-- 114 00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:24,783 all night, until like 8:00 p.m. 115 00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:26,409 I'm not even joking. Wanna play? 116 00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:28,703 Not now. I'm trying to get this TED Talk onto the TV. 117 00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:31,539 I can see the PornHub logo reflecting on your 118 00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:34,334 big, wet dog eyes, you scumbag. 119 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,920 Honestly, Stewie, I'm getting pretty bored of hide-and-seek. 120 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:39,297 Oh, please, Brian, just one game. Please? 121 00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,840 Okay. 122 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,425 But no more hiding in the fridge, 123 00:05:42,425 --> 00:05:44,594 in the washing machine, the open safe 124 00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:46,388 with the long-forgotten combination. 125 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:47,889 Oh, no, I'm way better now. 126 00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:49,641 I might be the best player in the world. 127 00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:52,394 Okay, I'm gonna go hide. Count to 20. 128 00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:01,736 I'll probably count to, like, six or seven minutes. 129 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:13,873 Oh, baby, that's the spot. 130 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,178 Oh, Amelie, Noelle, 131 00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:29,222 I have a 48-hour layover in Paris, 132 00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:31,433 and I'd love to include you in my horny plans. 133 00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:32,642 Oui, oui. 134 00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:35,145 Yeah, on me. That's what I was hoping for. 135 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:37,605 Oh, this is gonna be a great weekend. 136 00:06:37,605 --> 00:06:38,857 That seems like it's happening, right? 137 00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:40,650 Your orgy? Yeah. 138 00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:42,652 Can we just talk about plane stuff? 139 00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:43,945 Ah, I forget you young guys 140 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:45,864 don't like to talk about sex at work. 141 00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:48,241 Hey, take over for a sec. I gotta make sure I packed 142 00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,910 my pilot sunglasses that diminish our entire profession 143 00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:53,204 to a frat guy's Halloween costume. 144 00:06:56,916 --> 00:06:59,127 - Stewie? - Mr. Quagmire? 145 00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:00,837 Terrance. 146 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,096 All right, we're gonna get you home, little guy. 147 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:14,142 Peter, is Lois there? Put me on speaker. 148 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,269 Hi, Glenn. What's going on? 149 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:17,604 Well, I just flew to Paris, 150 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,773 and Stewie was somehow in my suitcase. 151 00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,066 He must have snuck in there. 152 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:23,234 Oh, my God! Is he okay? 153 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:25,862 Yeah, he's eating one of those weird French street ham things 154 00:07:25,862 --> 00:07:27,864 that aren't good but are also amazing. 155 00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,199 Look, how soon can you come get him? 156 00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:30,950 I only have 48 hours in Paris 157 00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:33,078 and a whole list of horny activities to do. 158 00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:35,830 Okay, let me just do the math. 159 00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,917 In 48 hours we'd need to get to an airport, 160 00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:41,544 which we're hours from, find a last-minute flight-- 161 00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:42,796 if there are any-- 162 00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:45,715 fly ten hours, then wait for Peter's 163 00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:47,342 post-flight airport poop... 164 00:07:47,342 --> 00:07:48,843 Peter don't poop on planes. 165 00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:52,430 Or we leave him in the care of a trusted adult 166 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,933 and one of our best friends and enjoy the first trip 167 00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:56,810 we've had together in years. 168 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,604 Lois, uh, shouldn't we go? 169 00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:01,981 Okay, if you think that... 170 00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:04,317 Ah! I got another like. 171 00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,528 Peter, listen, Stewie is safe, 172 00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,738 we're in the prettiest place we'll ever be 173 00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:10,740 and I'm on an Instagram hot streak. 174 00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,701 I can beat Bonnie's record. 175 00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,160 Still, as parents, I think that... 176 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,579 Oh, look, my mom's friend that kind of looks like 177 00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:19,416 the AT&T lady just commented on my last post. 178 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:23,586 She says, "Your husband is very handsome." 179 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:25,630 Quags, you got this, right? 180 00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:29,801 - Captain Quagmire, the Quags... - Stop! I can't believe this. 181 00:08:29,801 --> 00:08:31,469 Okay, I'll watch him. 182 00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:32,762 But I'm not happy, Peter. 183 00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:34,222 Oh, and now that you're my babysitter, 184 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,890 I'd rather you call me Mr. Griffin. 185 00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:40,729 Peter, did you just text me the peach emoji 186 00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:42,439 followed by the water squirt emoji? 187 00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,774 Yeah. You're the babysitter now. 188 00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:47,068 And it's "Mr. Griffin." 189 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:53,408 This is the Paris Attractions Channel, 190 00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:56,286 with a host who's never been to Paris. 191 00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:57,996 Oh, wow, what is that thing? 192 00:08:57,996 --> 00:09:01,082 The Eiffel Tower is one of Paris' top attractions. 193 00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,834 It's like a hundred feet, huh? 194 00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:05,795 Yeah, yeah. I wonder if you could get up there. 195 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:08,882 If you do plan on visiting, you want to get here early. 196 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:11,468 Is that right? Yeah, yeah, that could be cool. 197 00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:13,386 Hey, is that, like, the king's house? 198 00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:15,180 Oh! Can we go there? Please? 199 00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:16,806 I don't know what you're yammering about, 200 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,476 but the only place you're going is this hotel and the airport. 201 00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:21,227 Kind of thought you'd be asleep by now. 202 00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:24,314 I'm smart but not "put myself to sleep" smart. 203 00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:27,192 I'm just gonna put on some music for a bit to calm down. 204 00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:28,777 - What do you like? - Goo-goo. 205 00:09:28,777 --> 00:09:30,278 - The Dolls? - Gaga. 206 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:31,488 The Lady? Aha. 207 00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:32,864 Now you're talking my language. 208 00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:38,661 Hey. Hey, you got moves, man. 209 00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,789 Yeah, I mean, Ms. Christie put me two from the middle 210 00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:42,082 at dance class winter demo. 211 00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,583 I know what I'm doing. 212 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,085 Hey, you want to jump on the bed? 213 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:46,252 See how high you can get? 214 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:47,545 - Go ahead. - Is... 215 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:49,297 A-Are we allowed? 216 00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,007 Is this really happening? 217 00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:53,176 Hey, that looks fun. 218 00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,351 Me and this baby who is not mine 219 00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,269 are in the room below trying to sleep. 220 00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,437 This is hotel, 221 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:07,649 not jungle gym children's play structure. 222 00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:09,651 - Very sorry. - It won't happen again. 223 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,907 - What a loser. - What a dork baby. 224 00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:18,159 You know, I think they were weirdly on our plane. 225 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:21,121 I weirdly think those guys were on our airport shuttle. 226 00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,460 You know, I envy you, Stewie. 227 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,045 I used to be innocent like you. 228 00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,130 I've killed people. 229 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:31,881 Then I lost my virginity at six 230 00:10:31,881 --> 00:10:33,675 to our strangely female plumber. 231 00:10:33,675 --> 00:10:36,011 - Respect. - I know you're just a baby, but... 232 00:10:36,011 --> 00:10:37,679 I feel like you really understand me. 233 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:40,056 I can understand you, dude. 234 00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,435 Aw, it's late. You must be tired. 235 00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,690 There you go, little buddy. 236 00:10:52,027 --> 00:10:55,405 We now return to Toi, Moi et Dupree. 237 00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:57,157 Le wow. 238 00:11:03,204 --> 00:11:06,458 They say Mona Lisa's eyes follow you wherever you go. 239 00:11:11,713 --> 00:11:13,548 Yeesh. Quagmire was right. 240 00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:14,841 Somebody's in here! 241 00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,891 Oh, her expression is gas! 242 00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:33,735 Oh, this is it. 243 00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:36,654 A good caption and Bonnie's reign is over. 244 00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:38,865 Hey, how 'bout we stand on either side of the tree 245 00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:41,201 and the caption is "Tree Amigos"? 246 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:45,914 Or I'm holding a leaf and it says "Leafing is so hard"? 247 00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:47,290 Yeah, uh, you know, I feel like 248 00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:49,167 someone said "Tree Amigos" earlier 249 00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:50,669 and-and we were-- we were all laughing. 250 00:11:50,669 --> 00:11:52,295 Okay, step back. 251 00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:53,630 Another step. 252 00:11:56,299 --> 00:11:57,509 Big step back. 253 00:11:58,718 --> 00:11:59,969 Peter, are you sure? 254 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,721 I'm a little close to the edge. 255 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:04,933 No, you're fine. One more big, big step back. 256 00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:07,227 You know what, tiny step forward. 257 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:09,979 W... 258 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,525 Whoa, that's not usually how cliffs work. 259 00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:19,114 You know, Stewie, this wasn't the weekend I had planned, 260 00:12:19,114 --> 00:12:20,782 but I'm having a lot of fun with you. 261 00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:22,367 Me, too. It's so fun, 262 00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:24,994 I don't even mind the too-loud French radio. 263 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,579 Bonsoir, Paris. You're listening 264 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,498 to Double Vé-Cé-O-Qu, Le Coq. 265 00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:30,500 Rude 102! Shut up! 266 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,794 We've got deux tickets for Un Direction, 267 00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:34,671 so give us a call at cinq-cinq-cinq, 268 00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,339 cinq-cinq-cinq-cinq. 269 00:12:36,339 --> 00:12:39,134 And I hope the ladies have an umbrella for this next one 270 00:12:39,134 --> 00:12:41,553 or they'll be "Alouette." 271 00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:44,347 Alouette, gentille alouette. ♪ 272 00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:51,646 I love you, man. 273 00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:53,606 I love you, too, man. 274 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:57,527 And, hey, you know, I-I know my dad and everyone says 275 00:12:57,527 --> 00:12:59,946 that your car l-looks-- 276 00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:01,614 is like a woman's car, 277 00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:03,366 but I-I like it. 278 00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:05,535 And, hey, off-topic, but you-you don't think 279 00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:08,830 my car is-is like a-a woman's car, right? 280 00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:10,540 Yeah, no. No, no way, man. 281 00:13:10,540 --> 00:13:11,708 Okay, good, good, good. 282 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:13,460 Yeah, 'cause Peter's always saying stuff. 283 00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:15,295 I-I mean, I love your dad, 284 00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:18,131 but he's-he's just-- he's not very sensitive. 285 00:13:36,066 --> 00:13:38,068 Oh, my God, it's Madeline! 286 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,903 She must have snuck out of the nunnery. 287 00:13:39,903 --> 00:13:41,613 She's kind of a bad girl. 288 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:46,618 I got to shoot my shot with her. 289 00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:56,378 We are approaching 290 00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:57,879 the end of the line. 291 00:13:57,879 --> 00:14:00,632 Please grab all bags and babies. 292 00:14:00,632 --> 00:14:01,925 Stewie, we got to get off. 293 00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,551 Hey, Stewie, stop messing around. 294 00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:05,553 This is our stop. 295 00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:09,516 Stewie! Where are you?! 296 00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:10,767 Oh, please, you got to help me. 297 00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:11,935 I'm looking for a little boy 298 00:14:11,935 --> 00:14:13,478 with red overalls and a yellow shirt. 299 00:14:13,478 --> 00:14:15,438 You are looking to buy or to rent? 300 00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:17,315 What? No! God! 301 00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,609 How is Paris considered a classy city? 302 00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:21,986 The buildings are beautiful. The people are trash. 303 00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:30,078 Stewie! Stewie! 304 00:14:31,121 --> 00:14:32,622 Stewie! 305 00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,457 Sir, have you seen a baby 306 00:14:34,457 --> 00:14:36,126 with a football-shaped head around here? 307 00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:38,712 Yes, all babies have a round, football-shaped head. 308 00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:40,255 No, I mean the real football! 309 00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:42,257 The one where you can't remember how to put on pants 310 00:14:42,257 --> 00:14:43,466 when you're 38. 311 00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:44,551 Taxi! 312 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:47,220 Taxi rapid transfer garbage strike. 313 00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:50,557 It began a moment ago and will end the moment you leave. 314 00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:56,187 Stewie? 315 00:14:56,187 --> 00:14:57,814 Are you here? 316 00:15:02,652 --> 00:15:04,237 I'm screwed. 317 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:05,989 I'm totally screwed. 318 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:08,533 Wait a minute. I can't call Peter. 319 00:15:08,533 --> 00:15:09,659 He'll kill me! 320 00:15:16,458 --> 00:15:19,377 Ha-ha. Got him. 321 00:15:19,377 --> 00:15:21,129 Glenn Quagmire. 322 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:23,423 What... is... up? 323 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:24,799 I lost Stewie in Paris. 324 00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:26,509 We got separated and I can't find him. 325 00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:27,969 I'm too ashamed to tell Peter. 326 00:15:27,969 --> 00:15:29,304 What? Did you call the police? 327 00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:32,057 On strike. Brian, you're the last guy I want to call, 328 00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:33,516 but you know Stewie better than anyone. 329 00:15:33,516 --> 00:15:34,726 Can you help me find him? 330 00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:36,353 I'll fly you to Paris. 331 00:15:36,353 --> 00:15:39,189 First class and no male flight attendants in my area. 332 00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:41,358 - Fine. - I knew airlines could do that! 333 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:43,401 Also, I want a special Kibbles 'n Bits meal. 334 00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:45,070 - Fine... - Only, Quagmire, 335 00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,488 I want just the bits. 336 00:15:46,488 --> 00:15:48,490 Come on! Who's gonna pick the kibbles out? 337 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:51,368 I kind of don't want to have to think about that, Glenn. 338 00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:55,372 Lois, you had a big fall, but you're gonna be fine. 339 00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:56,498 We're getting you to the hospital. 340 00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:58,708 Oh, Peter, I'm so glad you're here. 341 00:15:58,708 --> 00:16:00,293 Me, too. Hey, you know, 342 00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,796 you were saying some crazy things when you were out. 343 00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:05,006 - I was? - Yeah, I mean, 344 00:16:05,006 --> 00:16:06,800 you said you lost 1,100 bucks on BetKings. 345 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:08,802 I checked the account. You definitely lost it. 346 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:11,304 But in light of what happened, I'm not mad at you. 347 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,807 I mean, UConn had literally never lost to Rutgers 348 00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:15,433 in lacrosse. I mean, it was free money. 349 00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:18,269 You're betting on lacrosse now? 350 00:16:18,269 --> 00:16:19,312 You're not wrong! 351 00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:21,773 There's no way UConn loses twice in a row! 352 00:16:21,773 --> 00:16:24,776 Plus, Syracuse's all-American attacker, Tristan Wyndcroft, 353 00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:25,777 broke his leg! 354 00:16:25,777 --> 00:16:27,862 It'll be all Huskies all day! 355 00:16:27,862 --> 00:16:29,614 Peter, no! 356 00:16:29,614 --> 00:16:30,615 Just rest, babe! 357 00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:32,659 I promise I'm not mad at you! 358 00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:38,623 Where else could Stewie be? 359 00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,875 Should we look in, like, a park? 360 00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:42,460 "In, like, a park"? 361 00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:44,879 I flew you out here for this level of insight? 362 00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:47,132 - I thought you knew him! - I do know him, okay? 363 00:16:47,132 --> 00:16:49,050 And I would have taken a lot better care of him. 364 00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:51,136 You lost him, Glenn! How do you do that? 365 00:16:51,136 --> 00:16:53,972 What, did you go to a-a sex... place or something 366 00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:55,390 and leave him tied up outside? 367 00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:57,600 No! We went out to dinner and drank some wine, 368 00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,353 just like every responsible adult and child in France. 369 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:01,688 But you're right. 370 00:17:01,688 --> 00:17:02,939 I lost him. 371 00:17:02,939 --> 00:17:05,900 And now he's gone and it's all my fault. 372 00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:07,736 I'm a loser. 373 00:17:07,736 --> 00:17:09,696 I'd do anything to get him back. 374 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,072 I really miss him. 375 00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:12,532 - You do? - Yeah. 376 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:13,867 We really bonded. 377 00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:15,118 It was nice. 378 00:17:15,118 --> 00:17:17,037 He's a special little guy, huh? 379 00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,872 Yeah. He sure is. 380 00:17:18,872 --> 00:17:20,081 We just got to find him. 381 00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:21,916 And in a town called "gay Paree," 382 00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:23,752 he could literally be anywhere. 383 00:17:29,674 --> 00:17:30,884 Where am I? 384 00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:33,053 What am I going to do? 385 00:17:36,348 --> 00:17:39,225 My guidebook said Marcel Proust is buried there. 386 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,727 He'll know what to do. 387 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:08,004 Ugh. Can't even get through his tomb quote. 388 00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:12,801 I wish Brian were here to pretend he gets it. 389 00:18:21,726 --> 00:18:24,437 The Père Lachaise Cemetery. 390 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,482 We were supposed to go before we got separated! 391 00:18:27,482 --> 00:18:29,651 Yeah, and while we're here, I wouldn't mind taking a leak 392 00:18:29,651 --> 00:18:31,319 on Gérard Depardieu's grave. 393 00:18:31,319 --> 00:18:32,487 He's still alive. 394 00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:33,655 Really? 395 00:18:33,655 --> 00:18:34,823 How? 396 00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:36,908 Stewie! 397 00:18:36,908 --> 00:18:39,661 - Stewie! - Hey, look! 398 00:18:39,661 --> 00:18:41,162 Stewie! 399 00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:44,165 Brian? What... what are you doing here? 400 00:18:44,165 --> 00:18:45,959 {\an8}Quagmire called me... 401 00:18:47,961 --> 00:18:49,254 And, um... 402 00:18:49,254 --> 00:18:51,673 and he told me you guys were playing hide-and-seek 403 00:18:51,673 --> 00:18:54,009 but that you were too good a player for him. 404 00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:55,969 He... he did? 405 00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,846 He did. He said he needed my help, 406 00:18:57,846 --> 00:18:59,848 because I'm a dog and I can smell you. 407 00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:02,183 You're too good to be found any other way. 408 00:19:02,183 --> 00:19:04,227 You know, this is probably the best hiding place 409 00:19:04,227 --> 00:19:05,311 I've ever seen. 410 00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:06,396 But it's not... 411 00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:08,064 It-it wasn't... 412 00:19:08,064 --> 00:19:09,399 You really think so? 413 00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:10,483 I know so. 414 00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:11,735 Nobody would ever look here. 415 00:19:11,735 --> 00:19:12,819 It's too scary. 416 00:19:12,819 --> 00:19:15,238 It is pretty scary. 417 00:19:15,238 --> 00:19:17,741 Am I the best hide-and-seek player in the world? 418 00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:19,200 Uh, yeah. 419 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,078 There's the best little travel buddy in the world! 420 00:19:23,079 --> 00:19:25,999 Whoa! I guess I'm really good at lots of stuff! 421 00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:28,960 I'd say we should get a room, but we already have one. 422 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,839 Yep. 423 00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:34,090 Totally. 424 00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:37,344 I missed you, you unrelenting douchebag. 425 00:19:37,344 --> 00:19:40,847 It seems today ♪ 426 00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:43,183 That all you see ♪ 427 00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:45,810 Is the violence in movies ♪ 428 00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:48,855 And hon-hon-hon on TV ♪ 429 00:19:48,855 --> 00:19:53,193 Lucky there's a family "gi." ♪ 430 00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:05,372 I'm sorry you broke your leg, Lois. 431 00:20:05,372 --> 00:20:07,999 Oh, no, Peter, I'm the one who's sorry. 432 00:20:07,999 --> 00:20:11,753 I got so wrapped up trying to beat Bonnie at stupid Instagram 433 00:20:11,753 --> 00:20:14,214 that I ruined our whole weekend. 434 00:20:15,006 --> 00:20:16,216 I don't believe it. 435 00:20:16,216 --> 00:20:18,760 Tristan Wyndcroft is checking in for Syracuse. 436 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,345 With a broken leg?! 437 00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:23,431 I know. What was I thinking? 438 00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:26,059 And the irony is she still has the record. 439 00:20:26,059 --> 00:20:28,728 I guess we should probably take an Instagram break 440 00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:29,729 for a bit, huh? 441 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,481 Probably. 442 00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:34,150 Can I check something on our bank account real quick? 443 00:20:35,193 --> 00:20:36,820 Uh, Lois? 444 00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:38,363 You may want to see this. 445 00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,076 Ah! Break's over! 446 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,703 Eat that, Bonnie! 447 00:20:44,703 --> 00:20:47,205 Oh, Peter, now that I have more likes than Bonnie, 448 00:20:47,205 --> 00:20:50,542 I realize that this was the best weekend ever. 449 00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:53,378 Wyndcroft scores with no time left! 450 00:20:53,378 --> 00:20:54,796 Syracuse wins! 451 00:20:54,796 --> 00:20:56,881 Man, Lois, 452 00:20:56,881 --> 00:21:00,927 you were saying some crazy stuff about BetKings during surgery.