1 00:00:01,885 --> 00:00:05,116 OLDER TED: Kids, up to this point in the story, we had found doppelgangers, 2 00:00:05,189 --> 00:00:08,784 eerie but awesome look-alikes, for four of the five members of our little group. 3 00:00:09,326 --> 00:00:10,384 There was Lesbian Robin... 4 00:00:10,461 --> 00:00:11,553 (SPITTING) 5 00:00:13,464 --> 00:00:14,954 Mustache Marshall, 6 00:00:16,533 --> 00:00:17,727 Stripper Lily... 7 00:00:17,801 --> 00:00:18,927 (PEOPLE CHEERING) 8 00:00:19,003 --> 00:00:22,370 And Mexican Wrestler Me. Yes, mine was the coolest. 9 00:00:23,307 --> 00:00:26,868 And so, we were all eager to find the fifth doppelganger, Barney's. 10 00:00:27,144 --> 00:00:29,510 Turned out it was more important to some of us than others. 11 00:00:29,580 --> 00:00:31,707 We agree there's no sense in having a baby 12 00:00:31,782 --> 00:00:34,250 until we've seen all five doppelgangers, right? 13 00:00:34,318 --> 00:00:35,910 Of course. Stands to reason. 14 00:00:35,986 --> 00:00:38,784 Okay, so, when we finally see Barney's doppelganger, 15 00:00:38,856 --> 00:00:41,552 that's the universe telling us it's go time, 16 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:44,287 and that's when we'll start trying. Deal? 17 00:00:44,361 --> 00:00:45,419 Deal. 18 00:00:45,496 --> 00:00:47,657 OLDER TED: And then one day, a few weeks later... 19 00:00:47,731 --> 00:00:50,632 Baby, were you serious about the whole fifth doppelganger thing? 20 00:00:50,701 --> 00:00:53,363 I mean, having a baby is a pretty big thing to leave up to the universe. 21 00:00:53,437 --> 00:00:57,601 Yeah, I know it's crazy. It's just so much easier to let the universe decide. 22 00:00:58,842 --> 00:01:02,608 - Why do you ask? - Boom! Universed! 23 00:01:03,414 --> 00:01:05,678 Oh, my God! Wait, wait, wait, hold on. 24 00:01:05,749 --> 00:01:08,479 That could easily be Barney pulling some scam to meet chicks. 25 00:01:08,552 --> 00:01:10,110 I'm one step ahead of you. 26 00:01:10,454 --> 00:01:11,648 Go for Barney. 27 00:01:11,722 --> 00:01:14,714 Barney, hey, it's Marshall. So, you are at work? 28 00:01:14,792 --> 00:01:17,625 You're not, I don't know, driving a cab, wearing a wig? 29 00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,523 Yes, I'm at work. 30 00:01:19,797 --> 00:01:23,494 That's the sound of my stapler. That's the sound of my three-hole punch. 31 00:01:23,567 --> 00:01:25,159 And this is the sound of me filing 32 00:01:25,235 --> 00:01:27,601 my corporate guidelines on sexual harassment. 33 00:01:28,272 --> 00:01:31,139 What is up? Gotta go, Big Chief. 34 00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:36,939 Barney's at work. 35 00:01:38,148 --> 00:01:40,480 That was the fifth doppelganger. 36 00:01:40,818 --> 00:01:41,807 (SIGHING) 37 00:01:42,353 --> 00:01:46,722 Marshall Eriksen, put a baby in my belly. 38 00:01:46,746 --> 00:01:53,746 ReEncoded By Dr.XJ | PSA PSArips.com 39 00:02:02,172 --> 00:02:05,938 I can't wait to tell the gang. This is one of those moments you dream about. 40 00:02:06,243 --> 00:02:08,973 "Guys, Lily and I 41 00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:13,016 "are having unprotected sex." Ooh, I just got the chills. 42 00:02:13,083 --> 00:02:15,779 - We're not gonna say anything. - What? Why? 43 00:02:15,853 --> 00:02:18,549 Marshall, if we tell them, we're basically inviting them 44 00:02:18,622 --> 00:02:21,682 into the most private, intimate moment of our lives. 45 00:02:22,025 --> 00:02:23,458 (ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING) 46 00:02:26,530 --> 00:02:27,827 - You guys banging? - (BOTH SCREAMING) 47 00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:30,162 Keep going. I'm not even here. 48 00:02:31,001 --> 00:02:33,902 But just for the record, having a baby, huge mistake. 49 00:02:33,971 --> 00:02:35,495 Now show me what you got. 50 00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:37,130 - Uncle Teddy's here! - (BOTH SCREAMING) 51 00:02:37,207 --> 00:02:39,869 Quick question. How are you guys gonna handle the whole Santa thing? 52 00:02:39,943 --> 00:02:43,777 I'm thinking, just be honest. (CHUCKLES) Oh, hell. I'll dress up. 53 00:02:44,515 --> 00:02:45,914 - "This just in" - (BOTH SCREAMING) 54 00:02:45,983 --> 00:02:48,281 is what Marshall Eriksen is about to say to his wife 55 00:02:48,352 --> 00:02:50,377 as he attempts to impregnate her. 56 00:02:50,454 --> 00:02:54,322 Chopper 12 is live on the scene with Baby Watch: 2010. 57 00:02:54,391 --> 00:02:55,858 (CHOPPER BLADES WHIRRING) 58 00:03:01,865 --> 00:03:04,800 Okay, fine. I won't tell anybody about the baby thing. 59 00:03:04,868 --> 00:03:05,926 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 60 00:03:06,003 --> 00:03:08,836 Guys, we saw the fifth doppelganger! 61 00:03:08,906 --> 00:03:11,397 - (GASPING) Amazing! - Whoa! That is awesome! 62 00:03:11,475 --> 00:03:14,000 Ooh! Freaky. A brunette Barney. 63 00:03:14,077 --> 00:03:18,070 I know. Say what you will about the guy, but Barney seems right as a blond. 64 00:03:18,148 --> 00:03:20,844 Well, that's true. Not every dude can pull off that blond look. 65 00:03:20,918 --> 00:03:23,478 - I don't know about that. - What? 66 00:03:24,188 --> 00:03:27,715 That summer I was lifeguarding at the Chagrin Falls Country Club, 67 00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:30,589 I was lathering a little lemon juice into the old mop, 68 00:03:30,661 --> 00:03:32,993 playing with some natural highlights. 69 00:03:33,063 --> 00:03:34,826 Let's just say there were a few senior citizens 70 00:03:34,898 --> 00:03:38,493 who pretended to drown on my watch. 71 00:03:38,569 --> 00:03:40,002 And sadly, one who did. 72 00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:42,334 Anyway, I'd look good blond. 73 00:03:43,474 --> 00:03:45,237 MARSHALL: Okay, people, we're in a delicate 74 00:03:45,309 --> 00:03:48,142 but very, very promising situation here. 75 00:03:48,212 --> 00:03:52,308 LILY: If we play the next 30 seconds right, Ted will dye his hair blond. 76 00:03:52,382 --> 00:03:56,580 ROBIN: Guys, this is mean. We can't... Whoa! Just pictured it. How do we do this? 77 00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,087 TED: What are we all thinking about? Nachos? 78 00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:01,750 MARSHALL: Ted Mosby responds to one thing above all else. 79 00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:04,191 TED: I don't know. I'm still kind of full from lunch. 80 00:04:04,261 --> 00:04:05,888 MARSHALL: A bunch of people emphatically telling him 81 00:04:05,963 --> 00:04:08,523 not to do something. Follow my lead. 82 00:04:09,132 --> 00:04:11,066 TED: Screw it. I could eat. 83 00:04:11,134 --> 00:04:14,194 Yes, we'd all like some nachos. 84 00:04:16,707 --> 00:04:21,235 I love you, buddy, but there is absolutely no way that you could pull off blond. 85 00:04:21,311 --> 00:04:23,472 Yeah, it just wouldn't look right. 86 00:04:23,547 --> 00:04:26,607 Yeah. Seriously, Ted, don't go blond. 87 00:04:27,284 --> 00:04:28,478 I'm going blond. 88 00:04:28,552 --> 00:04:29,644 - No. - No way. 89 00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:31,915 That is not the outcome we were hoping for. 90 00:04:33,323 --> 00:04:35,985 OLDER TED: Now, kids, Robin and Don were becoming such a great team, 91 00:04:36,059 --> 00:04:37,651 both off and on the air, 92 00:04:37,728 --> 00:04:40,390 that Local Channel 12 started asking them to guest-host 93 00:04:40,464 --> 00:04:42,261 some of their other top-notch programs. 94 00:04:42,432 --> 00:04:46,528 (SINGING) Monty and Moo-Moo are laughing and learning with you 95 00:04:46,603 --> 00:04:47,592 - Moo-Moo - Moo-Moo 96 00:04:47,671 --> 00:04:49,229 Moo! 97 00:04:49,806 --> 00:04:55,472 So, that's why Monty and I vowed never to do drugs, because drugs are bad. 98 00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:56,940 Right, Monty? 99 00:04:57,381 --> 00:05:00,646 Well, sure. Man-made, chemical stuff. 100 00:05:00,918 --> 00:05:06,823 But things that grow in nature, they're okay to try, like, once or twice. 101 00:05:07,624 --> 00:05:10,184 Not looking for gray areas here, Monty. 102 00:05:10,260 --> 00:05:13,627 I don't think it's right to lie to the kids, Moo-Moo. 103 00:05:14,464 --> 00:05:16,864 So, what are you saying? 104 00:05:18,201 --> 00:05:19,759 I've experimented with drugs. 105 00:05:19,836 --> 00:05:20,825 (GASPING) 106 00:05:21,305 --> 00:05:24,797 OLDER TED: Fun fact, highest rated Monty and Moo-Moo episode ever. 107 00:05:24,875 --> 00:05:25,864 ROBIN: Mmm. 108 00:05:26,777 --> 00:05:28,608 Mmm. What was that for? 109 00:05:28,679 --> 00:05:31,011 Before I met you, I'd given up on everything, 110 00:05:31,715 --> 00:05:34,684 relationships, career, pants. 111 00:05:37,387 --> 00:05:41,084 But you made me wanna try again. I love you for that. 112 00:05:41,291 --> 00:05:42,280 Oh. 113 00:05:43,827 --> 00:05:46,387 Ooh! Oh, I see. Mmm. 114 00:05:46,463 --> 00:05:47,452 (DON CHUCKLING) 115 00:05:52,035 --> 00:05:54,367 Hi. Hey. Hi. 116 00:05:54,438 --> 00:05:58,067 Sorry, you don't know me, but I just wanted to say thank you. 117 00:05:58,141 --> 00:06:00,905 You're actually a very important person in my life. 118 00:06:01,178 --> 00:06:06,775 Important? More like legendary. Marshall, it's me, Barney. 119 00:06:07,618 --> 00:06:09,347 OLDER TED: Oddly enough, this would rank as only 120 00:06:09,419 --> 00:06:11,080 the second biggest surprise of the day. 121 00:06:11,154 --> 00:06:13,384 Wow, this is just very sudden. 122 00:06:13,991 --> 00:06:18,655 Sure, I can get you an answer by tomorrow. Okay. Thanks. 123 00:06:20,497 --> 00:06:21,486 (SIGHS) 124 00:06:24,067 --> 00:06:27,594 Ted, something big has just happened and you're the most sensible person I know. 125 00:06:27,671 --> 00:06:28,899 I need to talk to you right now. 126 00:06:30,273 --> 00:06:32,833 - You know what, it can wait. - No, go ahead. I'm listening. 127 00:06:34,277 --> 00:06:37,212 Okay, well, the executive producer from WNKW 128 00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:40,215 happened to see our show the other morning and loved me. 129 00:06:40,283 --> 00:06:43,184 (SIGHS) They offered me the lead anchor job starting next week. 130 00:06:43,787 --> 00:06:47,484 - Wow! That's great! - It is great. But here's the catch. 131 00:06:47,924 --> 00:06:48,948 WNKW is in... 132 00:06:49,026 --> 00:06:50,050 (DRYER WHIRRING) 133 00:06:50,127 --> 00:06:51,526 Helen, kill the dryer! 134 00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:54,354 (WHIRRING STOPS) 135 00:06:54,431 --> 00:06:55,989 Is in Chicago. 136 00:07:01,371 --> 00:07:04,898 But you were the fifth doppelganger. How can you be you? 137 00:07:04,975 --> 00:07:07,375 I called you, Barney. We had a whole conversation. 138 00:07:07,444 --> 00:07:09,344 Ah! Yes. I know what happened. 139 00:07:09,413 --> 00:07:12,871 See, people at work have this very strange expectation 140 00:07:12,949 --> 00:07:17,613 that I, well, work. (SCOFFS) I know. I know. 141 00:07:18,422 --> 00:07:20,617 BARNEY: So to make my colleagues think I'm busting my hump 142 00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:24,889 when I'm really out humping busty chicks, I decided to record a special message. 143 00:07:25,362 --> 00:07:27,956 (BARNEY ON VOICEMAIL) What is up? Gotta go, Big Chief. 144 00:07:28,832 --> 00:07:30,356 How can it be a recording? 145 00:07:30,434 --> 00:07:33,870 You called me "Big Chief," my special workplace nickname. 146 00:07:34,538 --> 00:07:35,800 Oh, buddy. 147 00:07:38,542 --> 00:07:42,239 Hey, hey, come on, Big Chief. 148 00:07:42,312 --> 00:07:45,372 Don't. Just don't. 149 00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:48,275 Why does this have to happen now? 150 00:07:48,351 --> 00:07:51,218 I mean, just when things are going so great with Don. 151 00:07:51,722 --> 00:07:55,556 (SIGHING) It's the never-ending battle of my life. Career versus romance. 152 00:07:55,625 --> 00:08:01,063 (LAUGHS) "Never-ending battle"? Career's been trouncing romance for years. 153 00:08:01,131 --> 00:08:03,463 It's like the Globetrotters versus the Generals. 154 00:08:03,533 --> 00:08:05,763 Career's sinking hook shots from half court. 155 00:08:05,836 --> 00:08:07,303 Romance is just a bunch of slow, white guys 156 00:08:07,370 --> 00:08:10,032 who couldn't make it in the Italian league. 157 00:08:10,107 --> 00:08:14,203 Ted, I'm lost. What should I do? 158 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:17,646 Okay, you seriously need to talk to Don about this. 159 00:08:17,981 --> 00:08:20,415 I'm just too confused to put this on Don. 160 00:08:20,484 --> 00:08:23,681 I need to leave him out of it until I figure out what I want. 161 00:08:23,987 --> 00:08:25,477 - That makes sense. - Yeah. 162 00:08:25,555 --> 00:08:28,956 And I'm sorry I can't give you better advice on this. The truth is, 163 00:08:29,025 --> 00:08:32,085 it's impossible for me to be objective about you moving away. 164 00:08:34,798 --> 00:08:35,787 Mmm. 165 00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:37,627 Did you get a manicure? 166 00:08:37,701 --> 00:08:40,033 - No, I didn't get a... - He sure did. 167 00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:41,434 Flo! 168 00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:45,738 - Why are you brunette and driving a cab? - Oh! That. 169 00:08:46,076 --> 00:08:48,476 You know how it's my dream to have sex with at least one woman 170 00:08:48,545 --> 00:08:50,740 - from every country on the planet? - Sure. 171 00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:56,418 Wow. You're doing surprisingly well in the Baltics. 172 00:08:56,486 --> 00:08:57,510 Mmm-hmm. 173 00:08:57,587 --> 00:09:01,353 So I figured, what's the quickest way to get around the world in 180 lays? 174 00:09:01,424 --> 00:09:04,825 Lease a cab and wait outside the UN building for hot foreign chicks. 175 00:09:05,228 --> 00:09:06,627 BARNEY: It was the perfect plan. 176 00:09:07,330 --> 00:09:10,231 There was only one small detail I didn't take into account. 177 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:14,233 - Chicks don't want to bang cab drivers? - Chicks do not want to bang cab drivers. 178 00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:18,206 - And I put a lot of work into this one. - I can't believe this. 179 00:09:19,009 --> 00:09:21,671 Now I gotta tell Lily the fifth doppelganger is a fake. 180 00:09:21,745 --> 00:09:23,645 So, what does she care? 181 00:09:23,713 --> 00:09:27,046 Lily decided that once we spotted your doppelganger, 182 00:09:27,117 --> 00:09:31,110 - we'd start trying to have kids. - Kids! No! Uh-uh! 183 00:09:31,188 --> 00:09:36,353 The rule is, no kids until you're at least 45. Do you ever read my blog? 184 00:09:36,426 --> 00:09:38,291 It's gotten a lot better. 185 00:09:38,862 --> 00:09:41,831 I'm ready to be a dad, you know? 186 00:09:41,898 --> 00:09:44,833 But Lily needs some sign from the universe. 187 00:09:46,236 --> 00:09:47,965 And now it could be years. 188 00:09:48,839 --> 00:09:50,397 I'm sorry, buddy. 189 00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:53,469 That'll be 37.50. 190 00:09:54,544 --> 00:09:57,843 OLDER TED: So, that night, Marshall went home to break the bad news to Lily. 191 00:09:57,914 --> 00:10:03,375 The universe has spoken. Marshall Eriksen, let's make a baby. 192 00:10:05,155 --> 00:10:06,213 I... 193 00:10:08,625 --> 00:10:09,751 Okay. 194 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:13,924 - Hey. - Hey. 195 00:10:13,997 --> 00:10:15,430 (LAUGHING LOUDLY) 196 00:10:19,169 --> 00:10:22,366 You... Hang on, hang on, hang on. 197 00:10:22,439 --> 00:10:24,669 I heard you were doing this, so I wrote down some stuff. 198 00:10:24,741 --> 00:10:26,402 "Hey, I'm planning a white wedding. 199 00:10:26,476 --> 00:10:28,467 "Tell me, Billy Idol, is it a nice day for that?" 200 00:10:29,346 --> 00:10:31,439 Some other Billy Idol ones. 201 00:10:31,514 --> 00:10:34,881 "If anyone's looking for the real Slim Shady, he's right here." 202 00:10:34,951 --> 00:10:38,045 That one's only okay. Robin, why aren't you getting in on this? 203 00:10:38,121 --> 00:10:41,454 Okay, first of all, I'm getting tons of compliments. 204 00:10:41,524 --> 00:10:43,822 Second of all, tell him. 205 00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:46,419 - He's not getting tons of compliments. - No, the other thing. 206 00:10:46,596 --> 00:10:47,585 ROBIN: Oh. 207 00:10:49,332 --> 00:10:51,357 I might move to Chicago next week. 208 00:10:54,537 --> 00:10:55,799 - Hey, baby. - Mmm-hmm? 209 00:10:57,407 --> 00:11:00,570 Not for nothing or nothing, but we'd still be doing this 210 00:11:00,644 --> 00:11:02,612 even if we hadn't seen Doppelganger Barney, right? 211 00:11:02,679 --> 00:11:07,480 Oh, but we did see him, which means the universe, in all its infinite wisdom, 212 00:11:07,550 --> 00:11:10,815 is telling you to stick me and stick me real good. 213 00:11:11,454 --> 00:11:14,981 I can't. I can't, in good conscience, stick you. 214 00:11:15,292 --> 00:11:16,520 (LILY SIGHING) 215 00:11:17,193 --> 00:11:19,593 - I know what's bothering you. - Really? 216 00:11:19,829 --> 00:11:22,992 The cabbie just didn't look enough like Barney. 217 00:11:25,035 --> 00:11:26,900 Well, that's just not true. 218 00:11:27,003 --> 00:11:30,370 No! Time out. This is a group decision. 219 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:34,035 You can't just move to Chicago, unless we all say it's okay. 220 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:35,577 Barney, I think this has to be Robin's... 221 00:11:35,645 --> 00:11:38,910 Stay out of this, Brigitte Nielsen or Dolph Lundgren from Rocky IV. 222 00:11:39,616 --> 00:11:41,015 We need Marshall and Lily. 223 00:11:41,084 --> 00:11:43,109 That cabbie was, like, a foot shorter than Barney. 224 00:11:43,186 --> 00:11:44,881 He was the exact same size. 225 00:11:44,955 --> 00:11:47,253 And you know what? I think he was Asian. 226 00:11:47,324 --> 00:11:50,760 Yeah, that guy was like a tiny, graying Asian man, 227 00:11:50,827 --> 00:11:52,419 with a soul patch and a potbelly. 228 00:11:52,495 --> 00:11:54,520 Have you completely forgotten what Barney looks like? 229 00:11:54,597 --> 00:11:56,258 - You guys banging? - (BOTH SCREAMING) 230 00:11:56,700 --> 00:11:58,190 Why are you in our bedroom? 231 00:11:58,501 --> 00:11:59,593 (BOTH SCREAMING) 232 00:11:59,669 --> 00:12:01,034 Why are you in our bedroom? 233 00:12:01,104 --> 00:12:02,128 (BOTH SCREAMING) 234 00:12:02,205 --> 00:12:04,139 Why is Ellen DeGeneres in our bedroom? 235 00:12:04,207 --> 00:12:07,267 - (ROBIN AND BARNEY GIGGLE) - Hey! This is working. 236 00:12:09,012 --> 00:12:14,006 Wait a minute. Candles, flowers. 237 00:12:14,451 --> 00:12:20,913 Oh! I guess Marshall "forgot" to tell you. The fifth doppelganger was me. 238 00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:24,718 What, wait, and you knew about this? You lied to me? 239 00:12:24,828 --> 00:12:26,295 By omission. And it's only because 240 00:12:26,363 --> 00:12:29,332 this whole "leave it to the universe" thing of yours is insane, Lily. 241 00:12:29,399 --> 00:12:31,390 - Baby, you knew I needed to decide if we... - Lily, we need to be 242 00:12:31,468 --> 00:12:32,696 in control of our own destinies. 243 00:12:32,769 --> 00:12:35,738 Guys! Guys! We're forgetting what's really important here. 244 00:12:35,805 --> 00:12:37,170 Ted's blond. 245 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,537 (ALL GIGGLE) 246 00:12:38,608 --> 00:12:41,202 Guys, I am pulling this off. 247 00:12:41,578 --> 00:12:44,069 Now, Robin has something important to tell you. 248 00:12:44,147 --> 00:12:46,547 - He's not pulling it off. - No, the other thing. 249 00:12:46,616 --> 00:12:49,176 - He got a manicure. - The other thing. 250 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:52,715 I got a job offer in Chicago. 251 00:12:53,056 --> 00:12:54,114 Whoa! 252 00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:56,222 That's why we all came down here, 253 00:12:56,292 --> 00:12:58,556 to try and talk Robin out of making a huge... 254 00:12:58,628 --> 00:13:01,290 Actually, I've already made a decision. 255 00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:05,130 (SIGHS) Guys, I gotta take it. 256 00:13:12,442 --> 00:13:14,933 I can't believe we're losing Robin. 257 00:13:16,613 --> 00:13:18,672 LILY: Guys, this might be the depression talking, 258 00:13:18,748 --> 00:13:21,512 but is Ted's hair starting to look kind of good? 259 00:13:21,584 --> 00:13:23,882 MARSHALL: Thank God. I thought I was the only one. 260 00:13:23,953 --> 00:13:26,615 BARNEY: He looks like a freaking movie star. 261 00:13:26,689 --> 00:13:30,090 And by the way, this was a huge mistake. 262 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,424 - I'm changing my hair back. - Smart. Very smart. 263 00:13:32,495 --> 00:13:34,929 - Told you. - Not at all awesome. 264 00:13:35,131 --> 00:13:36,996 - Hey. - Hey. 265 00:13:37,467 --> 00:13:40,664 So, I just got off the phone with Chicago. 266 00:13:41,304 --> 00:13:43,602 Yes, I have made a decision. Um... 267 00:13:50,847 --> 00:13:54,783 I appreciate the offer, but I can't take the job. Thanks. 268 00:13:55,785 --> 00:13:57,912 - I'm staying. - Damn straight! 269 00:13:57,987 --> 00:13:59,181 (ALL CHEERING) 270 00:14:03,593 --> 00:14:05,891 Hey, Lily. Tell me something. 271 00:14:06,329 --> 00:14:08,593 You saw actual Barney driving that cab, 272 00:14:08,665 --> 00:14:12,066 and you thought it was a petite, potbellied Asian man. 273 00:14:12,135 --> 00:14:13,762 I know. Weird, right? 274 00:14:13,837 --> 00:14:15,668 It's not weird. 275 00:14:15,738 --> 00:14:19,799 It means you're not ready. And I'm sorry that I tried to rush things. 276 00:14:20,777 --> 00:14:23,268 Our baby can wait for the real Doppelganger Barney. 277 00:14:23,346 --> 00:14:24,643 (SIGHS) Oh. 278 00:14:36,326 --> 00:14:37,623 (IN PUPPET VOICE) Hey, Moo-Moo. 279 00:14:37,694 --> 00:14:40,595 Monty made you thin crust pizza, just the way you like it. 280 00:14:41,898 --> 00:14:42,922 ROBIN: Mmm. 281 00:14:44,334 --> 00:14:45,323 You okay? 282 00:14:46,269 --> 00:14:48,533 Robin, you're not gonna believe this. 283 00:14:48,605 --> 00:14:51,972 I got offered the lead anchor job at WNKW in Chicago. 284 00:14:54,077 --> 00:14:55,237 Oh! 285 00:14:56,546 --> 00:14:57,604 Um... 286 00:14:58,081 --> 00:14:59,343 What'd you say? 287 00:15:01,384 --> 00:15:02,612 I said yes. 288 00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:08,591 I've been waiting years for a shot like this. I was hoping you'd understand. 289 00:15:13,930 --> 00:15:15,022 Barney? 290 00:15:15,098 --> 00:15:18,590 (IN ESTONIAN ACCENT) I am simple street performer from Estonia. 291 00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:20,568 Who is this Barney? 292 00:15:20,637 --> 00:15:23,970 Oh, he's just this guy we know who has, like, a really lame blog. 293 00:15:24,541 --> 00:15:28,602 I hear it's getting better. I mean, what is "blog"? 294 00:15:29,078 --> 00:15:31,171 It's just something that was cool, like, eight years ago. 295 00:15:31,247 --> 00:15:33,841 Still cool. Still sounds pretty cool, man. 296 00:15:33,917 --> 00:15:35,578 - What's your name? - Kristof. 297 00:15:35,652 --> 00:15:36,949 Kristof what? 298 00:15:38,421 --> 00:15:41,720 Kristof Doppelganger. 299 00:15:41,791 --> 00:15:42,849 - Really? - Yeah. 300 00:15:42,926 --> 00:15:45,952 You're gonna go with the last name "Doppelganger"? 301 00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:48,691 - That's my name, man. - Bro. 302 00:15:49,666 --> 00:15:51,099 Robin, wait. Please try to understand. 303 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:52,794 Look, I gotta get out of here. 304 00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:54,598 Put yourself in my shoes. 305 00:15:54,671 --> 00:15:56,536 I mean, can you imagine what it's like to have the phone ring 306 00:15:56,606 --> 00:15:58,767 and it's your dream job on the other end? 307 00:15:59,809 --> 00:16:02,437 Yes. I can. 308 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:06,173 Good luck in Chicago, Don. 309 00:16:11,354 --> 00:16:13,049 Barney, why are you doing this? 310 00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:15,422 Wait a minute. 311 00:16:15,491 --> 00:16:19,825 Could it be that Barney Stinson actually wants us to have kids? 312 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:23,332 Who is this Barney? Take American chill pill. 313 00:16:24,901 --> 00:16:27,369 Well, let me tell you about him. 314 00:16:27,437 --> 00:16:28,904 He talks a big game about 315 00:16:28,972 --> 00:16:33,204 how no one should ever have kids before they're at least 45. 316 00:16:33,276 --> 00:16:37,508 I would be interested in reading some of these opinions in blog form. 317 00:16:37,847 --> 00:16:40,247 But I think I know what happened. 318 00:16:40,316 --> 00:16:44,480 Yesterday, Barney thought he had to say goodbye to someone he truly loves. 319 00:16:44,554 --> 00:16:46,522 And it got him thinking. 320 00:16:46,589 --> 00:16:50,320 Maybe it wouldn't be the worst thing if a baby joined our little group. 321 00:16:52,061 --> 00:16:55,622 - Babies can be cute. - Mmm. 322 00:16:56,366 --> 00:17:01,099 And someday, he's gonna make the best uncle in the world. 323 00:17:01,738 --> 00:17:04,935 Because this Barney, he's family to us. 324 00:17:16,019 --> 00:17:17,384 Excuse me. 325 00:17:18,087 --> 00:17:21,250 I heard you're from Estonia. So am I. 326 00:17:22,191 --> 00:17:23,749 Excuse me one moment. 327 00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,856 Estonia would close out the Baltics! 328 00:17:29,932 --> 00:17:32,867 And I am street performer, like you. 329 00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:49,212 (BARNEY GASPING) 330 00:17:53,289 --> 00:17:54,347 Hey. 331 00:17:55,124 --> 00:17:57,183 - (CRYING) Say yes to this. - Okay. 332 00:17:58,261 --> 00:17:59,990 Can I move back in? 333 00:18:04,534 --> 00:18:05,523 Yes. 334 00:18:08,071 --> 00:18:11,632 But, Ted, am I just the biggest idiot in the world? 335 00:18:11,708 --> 00:18:15,906 Look, think about all of us five years ago, when we first met you. 336 00:18:16,679 --> 00:18:19,011 TED: Marshall and Lily were just boyfriend and girlfriend. 337 00:18:19,082 --> 00:18:21,642 Now they're married and thinking about kids. 338 00:18:21,718 --> 00:18:25,677 And Barney? Barney was never gonna commit to anyone, ever. 339 00:18:26,322 --> 00:18:28,620 And last year, he fell in love. 340 00:18:29,659 --> 00:18:34,653 And me, I was chasing some girl I was convinced was the one. 341 00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:38,030 Now she's one of my closest friends. 342 00:18:38,301 --> 00:18:43,398 And you? Five years ago, you never would've chosen love over your career. 343 00:18:43,473 --> 00:18:45,703 But today, you did. 344 00:18:46,476 --> 00:18:50,469 - Looks like I'm getting dumber. - No, just more courageous. 345 00:18:53,516 --> 00:18:55,882 Look, we've all been searching for the five doppelgangers, right? 346 00:18:55,952 --> 00:18:56,941 Mmm-hmm. 347 00:18:57,286 --> 00:19:01,416 But eventually, over time, we all become our own doppelgangers. 348 00:19:01,491 --> 00:19:06,451 You know, these completely different people who just happen to look like us. 349 00:19:08,765 --> 00:19:12,565 Five Years Ago Robin? That girl, she was pretty great. 350 00:19:14,137 --> 00:19:18,801 But Doppelganger Robin? She's amazing. 351 00:19:29,452 --> 00:19:30,441 We've, um... 352 00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:34,082 - We've had a lot to drink. - I don't care. 353 00:19:37,660 --> 00:19:38,718 (ROBIN LAUGHING) 354 00:19:38,795 --> 00:19:39,955 What? 355 00:19:40,363 --> 00:19:41,352 Oh! 356 00:19:42,899 --> 00:19:46,733 - I forgot. I'm blond. I have blond hair. - You're blond. 357 00:19:46,803 --> 00:19:47,792 OLDER TED: And that's the story 358 00:19:47,870 --> 00:19:50,361 of how dyeing my hair blond kept us from doing something 359 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,704 we both would have regretted that night. 360 00:19:53,476 --> 00:19:55,376 Kids, the universe is funny. 361 00:20:05,021 --> 00:20:06,283 Oh, my God. 362 00:20:07,190 --> 00:20:09,055 - Yes! You're here! - I don't understand... 363 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:10,422 This is fantastic! 364 00:20:10,493 --> 00:20:13,519 Baby, simmer. Your husband's right here. At least attempt to hide it. 365 00:20:13,596 --> 00:20:15,223 Guys, follow me. 366 00:20:18,568 --> 00:20:21,628 Guys, look! The fifth doppelganger! 367 00:20:25,374 --> 00:20:28,070 - Uh, Lily? - That dude looks... 368 00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,669 MARSHALL: Guys, go with it. 369 00:20:31,380 --> 00:20:34,816 OLDER TED: Kids, you can ask the universe for signs all you want. 370 00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:37,210 - It's uncanny. - Right? 371 00:20:37,286 --> 00:20:39,220 - Looks just like Barney. - Amazing. 372 00:20:39,288 --> 00:20:41,415 It's like looking in the mirror. 373 00:20:41,491 --> 00:20:44,426 OLDER TED: But ultimately, we only see what we wanna see, 374 00:20:44,494 --> 00:20:46,553 when we're ready to see it. 375 00:20:47,697 --> 00:20:50,063 So, does this mean... 376 00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:54,061 Marshall Eriksen, put a baby in my belly. 377 00:20:54,136 --> 00:20:55,364 (LIFESIZEPLAYING) 378 00:20:55,438 --> 00:20:59,340 All for love we become 379 00:20:59,408 --> 00:21:03,469 Larger than lifesize, wondersome 380 00:21:03,546 --> 00:21:06,982 Great in the eyes of someone 381 00:21:33,142 --> 00:21:34,131 ENGLISH - US - SDH