1
00:00:01,531 --> 00:00:05,694
In 1994, Robin's dad took her to
New York City for the first time...
2
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:07,752
This is amazing! Thank you, sir!
3
00:00:07,771 --> 00:00:10,888
Well, a little father-son bonding
trip never hurt anyone.
4
00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:14,953
I did almost die from
malnutrition on that wolf hunt last year...
5
00:00:14,965 --> 00:00:18,767
I had to almost kill you
for you to learn how to kill.
6
00:00:20,075 --> 00:00:21,581
New York City's the best, eh?
7
00:00:21,599 --> 00:00:24,765
I despise it. It's like
Edmonton, minus the arts and culture.
8
00:00:24,779 --> 00:00:27,776
- Come on, we'll miss our flight.
- I'll catch up.
9
00:00:29,637 --> 00:00:32,305
One day, I'm gonna move here,
10
00:00:32,394 --> 00:00:35,732
marry a sophisticated big-city man
11
00:00:35,771 --> 00:00:37,259
with a sick mullet...
12
00:00:37,272 --> 00:00:40,448
like all the way down
to his shoulder pads,
13
00:00:40,487 --> 00:00:41,781
and at night,
14
00:00:41,847 --> 00:00:44,008
he'll let me brush it...
15
00:00:45,090 --> 00:00:47,869
and I'll dig up this locket
16
00:00:48,340 --> 00:00:52,792
so it can be my
"something old" at our wedding.
17
00:00:53,099 --> 00:00:54,400
R.J.!
18
00:00:54,434 --> 00:00:55,867
Coming, sir!
19
00:00:57,329 --> 00:00:59,247
I'll be back for you.
20
00:01:01,486 --> 00:01:05,330
Back then, I was-I was too
embarassed to tell you why I'd done that, but
21
00:01:05,364 --> 00:01:06,671
we're closer now.
22
00:01:06,683 --> 00:01:08,986
I feel like I don't have to
hide my feminine side anymore
23
00:01:08,998 --> 00:01:10,406
just because you've always wanted a...
24
00:01:10,428 --> 00:01:12,803
Son! It's Barney!
25
00:01:12,918 --> 00:01:13,987
Great!
26
00:01:14,003 --> 00:01:16,039
I'll be there in 15, B-dawg.
27
00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,600
Woof, woof!
28
00:01:19,790 --> 00:01:20,796
That's our thing.
29
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:22,416
Uh... be where in 15?
30
00:01:22,435 --> 00:01:23,472
Laser tag.
31
00:01:23,492 --> 00:01:25,747
Never been. B
- dawg's gonna teach me.
32
00:01:26,465 --> 00:01:28,981
Look, I think that it's
great that you and Barney are...
33
00:01:28,999 --> 00:01:30,275
B
- dawg.
34
00:01:30,540 --> 00:01:32,565
B-dawg are bonding,
35
00:01:32,591 --> 00:01:35,291
but... you
agreed to help me with this.
36
00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:36,753
Fine.
37
00:01:36,818 --> 00:01:39,437
- Where did you bury this tampon?
- It's a locket.
38
00:01:39,462 --> 00:01:42,448
I'm sorry, I get all
these girlie things confused.
39
00:01:42,829 --> 00:01:45,252
Do you need my help or not?
40
00:01:46,558 --> 00:01:47,702
Nah,
41
00:01:47,722 --> 00:01:49,939
it's stupid.
42
00:01:50,225 --> 00:01:52,784
So while Robin
searched for her something old,
43
00:01:52,812 --> 00:01:55,275
Lily and Marshall
packed for their something new:
44
00:01:55,299 --> 00:01:57,967
Lily's year-long art consultant
gig in Italy.
45
00:01:58,005 --> 00:02:01,289
I still can't believe we
have to say goodbye to this place...
46
00:02:01,301 --> 00:02:03,192
Oh. I know, baby.
47
00:02:03,204 --> 00:02:05,909
But look at it as an
excuse to simplify our lives.
48
00:02:05,943 --> 00:02:09,340
You know, we can't bring everything to
Italy, so we gotta throw out some junk.
49
00:02:09,387 --> 00:02:10,880
For example, look...
50
00:02:10,893 --> 00:02:12,869
my old Sasquatch binders
51
00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:14,894
that "I could never throw away"
52
00:02:14,912 --> 00:02:18,515
because "I was gonna be the guy
who proved the existence of Bigfoot..."
53
00:02:18,533 --> 00:02:21,003
These are obviously coming
to Italy. But these handbags?
54
00:02:21,034 --> 00:02:23,809
- Gonzo.
- No way!
55
00:02:23,850 --> 00:02:26,328
These have sentimental meaning to me.
56
00:02:26,353 --> 00:02:28,225
Didn't you shop-lift
these in your 20s?
57
00:02:28,245 --> 00:02:30,741
Yes, and I get very nostalgic
for that time.
58
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:34,430
You get older, you have
kids, you stop stealing, it's sad.
59
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:36,680
Lily... we just
don't have room for these.
60
00:02:36,708 --> 00:02:39,767
Oh, but you get to
keep your Bigfoot binders?
61
00:02:39,802 --> 00:02:40,615
Wait,
62
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:43,759
why is this one just December 1999?
63
00:02:43,794 --> 00:02:45,600
Oh. Y2K was coming.
64
00:02:45,631 --> 00:02:48,180
Lot of people took to the woods.
65
00:02:49,056 --> 00:02:50,806
Saw the truth.
66
00:02:51,446 --> 00:02:53,817
Okay, Marshall, we
don't have time to argue
67
00:02:53,842 --> 00:02:56,047
over what stays and what goes.
68
00:02:56,064 --> 00:02:58,064
Ooh, you know who we gotta bring in?
69
00:02:58,099 --> 00:03:00,621
Okay, I agree he is good at this stuff,
70
00:03:00,646 --> 00:03:02,668
but he just gets so cocky.
71
00:03:02,692 --> 00:03:04,036
No, he doesn't.
72
00:03:07,467 --> 00:03:09,578
So I heard you guys have a bit of a...
73
00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:11,837
packing situation.
74
00:03:12,117 --> 00:03:14,568
I acknowledge now this was a mistake.
75
00:03:14,615 --> 00:03:17,885
Look, I came here to
chew bubblegum and pack boxes.
76
00:03:17,910 --> 00:03:20,288
And I'm all out of bubble...
77
00:03:20,313 --> 00:03:22,516
Oh, my God... Oh, my God.
78
00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:24,610
I swallowed it.
79
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:26,644
Is that bad?
80
00:03:26,662 --> 00:03:28,135
Okay, thank you.
81
00:03:28,157 --> 00:03:29,968
Well, Dr. Goldsmith
says I should be fine.
82
00:03:29,993 --> 00:03:32,462
I just have to look for it in my stool.
83
00:03:33,152 --> 00:03:35,083
So as I was saying...
84
00:03:35,238 --> 00:03:37,182
I heard you guys have a bit of a...
85
00:03:37,269 --> 00:03:39,273
packing situation.
86
00:03:52,999 --> 00:03:54,833
Now, as you know,
87
00:03:54,904 --> 00:03:57,942
I'm a bit of a legend when
it comes to packing.
88
00:03:58,078 --> 00:03:59,761
- We know.
- We know.
89
00:04:00,132 --> 00:04:01,332
Tales are still told
90
00:04:01,357 --> 00:04:04,485
of the time I
traveled all through Spain...
91
00:04:05,150 --> 00:04:07,369
for two weeks...
92
00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:10,631
with everything I needed
93
00:04:10,649 --> 00:04:14,584
efficiently packed into a
hands-free belt satchel.
94
00:04:14,623 --> 00:04:16,522
The locals called me...
95
00:04:16,546 --> 00:04:22,546
ReEncoded By Dr.XJ | PSA
PSArips.com
96
00:04:22,936 --> 00:04:25,831
Yeah, it's not a
"hands-free belt satchel," Ted.
97
00:04:25,837 --> 00:04:28,581
- It's a fanny pack.
- It's not a fanny pack.
98
00:04:28,599 --> 00:04:31,705
Okay, In Spanish, El
Ganso con la Riñonera
99
00:04:31,717 --> 00:04:33,097
means "Fanny Pack Dork".
100
00:04:33,128 --> 00:04:37,053
No, it doesn't. It means
"Packer of Great Skill and Merit".
101
00:04:37,136 --> 00:04:38,398
I looked it up.
102
00:04:38,422 --> 00:04:40,587
It means "Fanny Pack Dork".
103
00:04:40,610 --> 00:04:43,723
And as a Packer of
Great Skill and Merit,
104
00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:47,113
I will tell you how to
pack with Tetris-like precision.
105
00:04:47,133 --> 00:04:49,552
We get it, you pack a lot in your fanny.
106
00:04:49,558 --> 00:04:51,479
Obvious yet delightful.
107
00:04:51,512 --> 00:04:52,494
Okay.
108
00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:55,214
I got a big interview at 3:00 about
possibly designing another building.
109
00:04:55,232 --> 00:04:58,032
Until then, if you abide by my rulings,
110
00:04:58,044 --> 00:05:00,444
I will tell you what goes to Italy
111
00:05:00,540 --> 00:05:02,428
and what goes in...
112
00:05:02,734 --> 00:05:03,909
The Triangle.
113
00:05:04,490 --> 00:05:06,680
Kids, as you know, "The
Bermuda Triangle"
114
00:05:06,707 --> 00:05:09,574
was the name we gave to the
curb right outside our apartment,
115
00:05:09,900 --> 00:05:14,174
which possessed the magical
ability to make any item disappear.
116
00:05:14,438 --> 00:05:15,637
Instantly.
117
00:05:15,870 --> 00:05:17,733
The biggest rule for de-cluttering is,
118
00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:19,507
"Have you used it
119
00:05:19,734 --> 00:05:20,812
in the last year?"
120
00:05:20,824 --> 00:05:22,618
If not...
121
00:05:22,942 --> 00:05:24,386
Triangle.
122
00:05:24,641 --> 00:05:27,266
Have you used this
jump rope in the last year?
123
00:05:27,478 --> 00:05:30,166
Are you kidding? I hop threads
every morning, son!
124
00:05:30,207 --> 00:05:32,538
Do three in a row and you can keep it.
125
00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:37,030
Well-played, Mosby.
126
00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:38,901
Next!
127
00:05:39,437 --> 00:05:42,051
Have you used it in the last year?
128
00:05:42,264 --> 00:05:45,674
Gee, I can't remember.
129
00:05:48,369 --> 00:05:50,107
Are you trying to bribe me?
130
00:05:50,628 --> 00:05:52,516
I don't know what you're talking about.
131
00:05:52,536 --> 00:05:54,567
- Take it.
- Triangle!
132
00:05:55,778 --> 00:05:57,130
Next!
133
00:06:00,398 --> 00:06:02,261
Wow, you're a natural...
134
00:06:02,273 --> 00:06:03,711
Dad.
135
00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:05,325
You know, I love Robin.
136
00:06:05,341 --> 00:06:07,453
And her sister's okay, I guess. But...
137
00:06:07,474 --> 00:06:10,310
there's something
nice about finally having...
138
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,850
- a son.
- A s...
139
00:06:14,663 --> 00:06:15,913
I...
140
00:06:15,932 --> 00:06:17,781
Cristalli twins, nine o'clock!
141
00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:22,935
Now make like your
mommy's ovum and split!
142
00:06:23,721 --> 00:06:25,884
Solid biology joke, B-dawg.
143
00:06:25,902 --> 00:06:27,115
Woof, woof!
144
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:30,570
Now, I'll admit, to the untrained eye,
145
00:06:30,595 --> 00:06:33,383
a few of my packing
rulings may have seemed arbitrary.
146
00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:36,307
Let's Go Italy? Triangle.
147
00:06:36,829 --> 00:06:38,029
Triangle...
148
00:06:38,061 --> 00:06:39,430
let's go Italy.
149
00:06:40,362 --> 00:06:43,530
A gorilla suit and a blonde wig.
150
00:06:43,551 --> 00:06:46,032
Have you used either of
these in the last year?
151
00:06:49,827 --> 00:06:51,840
Please, Queen Kong...
152
00:06:51,861 --> 00:06:53,477
be gentle.
153
00:06:55,567 --> 00:06:58,645
- Nope, haven't used those.
- I don't think those even belong to us.
154
00:06:59,207 --> 00:07:01,282
Okay, here's an easy one.
155
00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:04,713
A leaky,
ten-year-old beanbag chair
156
00:07:04,732 --> 00:07:06,796
covered in beer, bong water
157
00:07:06,814 --> 00:07:10,337
and fossilized Cool
Ranch Dorito fingerprints.
158
00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:11,775
Italy.
159
00:07:13,765 --> 00:07:16,412
Guys, this chair has been here forever.
160
00:07:16,430 --> 00:07:17,685
You gotta take it with you.
161
00:07:17,710 --> 00:07:18,960
- Italy.
- Ted...
162
00:07:18,985 --> 00:07:21,535
Italy doesn't need
something that is wrinkled,
163
00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:22,860
red and leaky,
164
00:07:22,873 --> 00:07:25,298
and smells like booze and narcotics.
165
00:07:25,397 --> 00:07:28,069
They've already got former
Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.
166
00:07:29,125 --> 00:07:30,931
I don't know who that is.
167
00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:33,248
All rulings are final.
168
00:07:33,272 --> 00:07:36,793
Okay, why are things that
we like getting "Triangled"
169
00:07:36,799 --> 00:07:39,715
- and crap you like sneaks through?
- Like what?
170
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:41,729
That old 50-pound karaoke machine.
171
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:42,785
Come on!
172
00:07:42,809 --> 00:07:45,791
We sang in the New Year in '02
on this thing, remember?
173
00:07:45,811 --> 00:07:47,728
We were Destiny's Child!
174
00:07:49,652 --> 00:07:51,095
And since I was Beyonce,
175
00:07:51,100 --> 00:07:53,337
I'm pretty sure I get
final say here, so...
176
00:07:53,349 --> 00:07:56,517
Oh, we were not your backup singers,
bitch, we were a group.
177
00:07:56,535 --> 00:07:59,468
I'm sorry, are you
guys married to Jay-Z,
178
00:07:59,494 --> 00:08:01,702
or am I married to Jay-Z?
179
00:08:01,820 --> 00:08:03,207
Italy.
180
00:08:06,708 --> 00:08:07,646
Wow.
181
00:08:07,672 --> 00:08:10,650
The way you used that kid having
an asthma attack as a human shield?
182
00:08:10,681 --> 00:08:12,619
- That took my breath away.
- Yeah.
183
00:08:12,638 --> 00:08:14,338
Okay, next,
184
00:08:14,369 --> 00:08:17,082
I'll be point guy and you
lay down cover. So I'm...
185
00:08:17,101 --> 00:08:19,180
are you suggesting that
I will not be point guy?
186
00:08:20,117 --> 00:08:22,059
Look, if Michael Jordan's healthy,
187
00:08:22,083 --> 00:08:24,640
you don't let Scottie
Pippen run the offense.
188
00:08:25,027 --> 00:08:27,228
Oh, you're from Canada, right.
189
00:08:27,248 --> 00:08:28,573
If... how do I put this?
190
00:08:28,591 --> 00:08:31,749
If Wayne Gretzky's
healthy, you don't let...
191
00:08:31,781 --> 00:08:33,044
uh...
192
00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:34,646
François...
193
00:08:35,009 --> 00:08:38,726
What I'm saying is: hockey
is stupid and I'm point guy.
194
00:08:38,751 --> 00:08:41,057
Well, I'm point guy or I'm off the team.
195
00:08:41,069 --> 00:08:43,900
Gah! You are the most
stubborn human being I have ever met!
196
00:08:43,919 --> 00:08:46,547
You better get used to
it... you're marrying a Scherbatsky.
197
00:08:46,572 --> 00:08:48,797
Your daughter is not even a fraction
198
00:08:48,815 --> 00:08:51,280
as obstinate, stubborn and...
199
00:08:51,305 --> 00:08:53,105
insane as you are!
200
00:08:53,140 --> 00:08:56,609
Where are you, you son of a bitch?
201
00:08:57,259 --> 00:08:58,828
Look away, kids, she's about to pee.
202
00:08:58,840 --> 00:08:59,922
What...?
203
00:08:59,946 --> 00:09:01,535
I am not some animal.
204
00:09:01,561 --> 00:09:05,668
I peed 20 minutes ago and I
buried it neatly because I am a lady!
205
00:09:12,173 --> 00:09:15,212
Ted, we haven't used this
chair in the last year.
206
00:09:15,238 --> 00:09:17,406
Ergo, Triangle.
207
00:09:17,437 --> 00:09:18,881
Yeah, I guess I see your point.
208
00:09:18,906 --> 00:09:21,565
I mean, if you haven't
used it in the last year...
209
00:09:21,590 --> 00:09:23,136
Oh!
210
00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:24,174
Using it!
211
00:09:24,192 --> 00:09:26,455
- Italy!
- Triangle!
212
00:09:26,495 --> 00:09:27,721
Italy.
213
00:09:27,739 --> 00:09:29,396
- Triangle!
- Triangle!
214
00:09:29,426 --> 00:09:30,805
- Italy.
- Okay, stop!
215
00:09:30,830 --> 00:09:34,832
Every time he lands, that chair farts
out ten-year-old Dorito dust.
216
00:09:34,864 --> 00:09:36,728
Yeah, it's the chair.
217
00:09:37,063 --> 00:09:39,764
Guys, trust me: you're
gonna want this chair in Italy.
218
00:09:39,783 --> 00:09:42,230
I... it'll feel like home.
219
00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:44,334
All right, buddy.
220
00:09:44,632 --> 00:09:46,696
You win. Italy.
221
00:09:46,708 --> 00:09:48,021
- Really?
- Yeah.
222
00:09:48,034 --> 00:09:51,528
We asked you to be the judge
here and we gotta trust your opinion.
223
00:09:51,546 --> 00:09:52,671
She's right.
224
00:09:52,703 --> 00:09:55,553
And with all the
traveling that we'll be doing...
225
00:09:55,732 --> 00:09:57,865
we could probably
use a couple of your...
226
00:09:57,905 --> 00:09:59,855
hands-free belt satchels.
227
00:10:00,864 --> 00:10:03,558
- You said they were lame.
- I hate to admit it,
228
00:10:03,577 --> 00:10:06,595
but they actually sound useful.
229
00:10:06,872 --> 00:10:08,981
Could you buy us a couple?
230
00:10:10,507 --> 00:10:12,615
Two hands-free belt satchels,
coming right up.
231
00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:15,695
Oh, and don't worry, I'll get
cool colors so you guys don't look like
232
00:10:15,707 --> 00:10:18,931
whatever the Spanish term
really is for "Fanny Pack Dork".
233
00:10:25,508 --> 00:10:26,826
Men,
234
00:10:26,853 --> 00:10:28,259
it's us...
235
00:10:28,272 --> 00:10:30,035
versus them.
236
00:10:30,413 --> 00:10:32,982
Our actions here today
237
00:10:33,006 --> 00:10:34,794
will echo through eternity...
238
00:10:34,812 --> 00:10:37,154
Stand up straight, Kaden!
239
00:10:37,935 --> 00:10:41,270
I only have one rule,
you worthless maggots:
240
00:10:42,347 --> 00:10:44,354
We all respect each other.
241
00:10:44,649 --> 00:10:46,520
I only have one rule:
242
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:50,077
For every three tens you
bang, throw a bone to a five.
243
00:10:50,234 --> 00:10:52,335
They're grateful and hard-working
and let's face it,
244
00:10:52,366 --> 00:10:54,085
sometimes you just want to lay there.
245
00:10:54,140 --> 00:10:56,448
What's that got to do with Laser Tag?
246
00:10:59,593 --> 00:11:02,003
Everything!
247
00:11:02,020 --> 00:11:03,822
and we will prevail,
248
00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:06,169
even if it takes all night!
249
00:11:06,743 --> 00:11:07,831
Tanner.
250
00:11:08,025 --> 00:11:10,075
I have to be home by 4:00.
251
00:11:12,788 --> 00:11:14,948
Anyone else have any scheduling issues?
252
00:11:15,010 --> 00:11:17,323
You can take down
anyone on their team...
253
00:11:17,451 --> 00:11:19,795
but I want the big man for myself.
254
00:11:19,969 --> 00:11:22,219
What's your beef with oldie?
255
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,246
He's...
256
00:11:24,431 --> 00:11:25,556
my father.
257
00:11:25,581 --> 00:11:28,195
- Father-in-law.
- Shut up, Kai.
258
00:11:33,928 --> 00:11:35,139
Wait a second...
259
00:11:35,299 --> 00:11:37,694
We get it, you pack a lot in your fanny.
260
00:11:37,707 --> 00:11:39,855
Obvious yet delightful.
261
00:11:40,723 --> 00:11:42,256
Oh, no!
262
00:11:46,607 --> 00:11:50,538
No!
263
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,675
- El Ganso!
- El Ganso!
264
00:11:53,687 --> 00:11:54,888
Liars!
265
00:11:54,918 --> 00:11:57,831
- You sent me on a fool's errand.
- Okay, to be fair,
266
00:11:57,859 --> 00:12:00,503
buying a fanny pack is inherently
a fool's errand.
267
00:12:00,517 --> 00:12:02,849
Hands-free belt satchels.
268
00:12:02,959 --> 00:12:06,645
And just for that, I will not move
from this chair until you agree to keep it!
269
00:12:06,796 --> 00:12:09,779
Ted, unlike that chair,
you, sir, are full of beans.
270
00:12:10,064 --> 00:12:12,567
You have a job
interview in half an hour.
271
00:12:14,217 --> 00:12:15,406
Screw the interview.
272
00:12:15,455 --> 00:12:16,431
I'm staying.
273
00:12:16,456 --> 00:12:20,106
And because the
forecast calls for rain...
274
00:12:20,266 --> 00:12:21,547
This...
275
00:12:21,572 --> 00:12:23,572
is a raincoat.
276
00:12:32,296 --> 00:12:33,533
Go for Barney.
277
00:12:33,546 --> 00:12:35,346
Hey. Um...
278
00:12:35,794 --> 00:12:37,338
I'm having an issue.
279
00:12:37,370 --> 00:12:38,523
Now, listen, Robin...
280
00:12:38,536 --> 00:12:40,787
is this urgent or can we
talk about it later?
281
00:12:41,693 --> 00:12:43,518
Nah, it's stupid.
282
00:12:43,793 --> 00:12:45,313
Have fun.
283
00:12:48,036 --> 00:12:49,586
So long, losers!
284
00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:55,240
Um... Look, can you guys help me down?
285
00:12:55,343 --> 00:12:57,093
I... um...
286
00:12:57,124 --> 00:12:59,449
Ted, if this chair
really means that much to you,
287
00:12:59,461 --> 00:13:01,122
why don't you just take
it for yourself?
288
00:13:01,153 --> 00:13:03,764
No, it's important that you keep it.
289
00:13:03,790 --> 00:13:04,995
Why?
290
00:13:05,422 --> 00:13:08,426
This is the first thing we
bought when we moved here after college.
291
00:13:08,697 --> 00:13:12,065
It was the only piece of furniture
we had for a week.
292
00:13:12,180 --> 00:13:14,301
And now you two are moving to Italy.
293
00:13:14,323 --> 00:13:18,417
What if our friendship doesn't pass
the "Have you used it in a year" test?
294
00:13:18,503 --> 00:13:21,274
If you can throw out this chair...
295
00:13:21,444 --> 00:13:23,825
who's to say you
can't throw me out, too?
296
00:13:23,888 --> 00:13:26,157
- That could never happen.
- You're not a chair,
297
00:13:26,169 --> 00:13:27,407
you're our best friend.
298
00:13:27,426 --> 00:13:30,488
You can say that, but a
lot can change in a year.
299
00:13:30,863 --> 00:13:33,304
- Buddy, I...
- Look, I know I'm being crazy.
300
00:13:33,329 --> 00:13:34,843
I just...
301
00:13:36,164 --> 00:13:38,360
I just need a moment with this chair.
302
00:13:38,388 --> 00:13:39,391
You know...
303
00:13:39,416 --> 00:13:40,997
to say good-bye.
304
00:13:41,088 --> 00:13:43,449
We'll give you two some space.
305
00:13:47,134 --> 00:13:50,553
Kids, you can't cling to the past.
306
00:13:56,535 --> 00:14:00,278
Because no matter
how tightly you hold on...
307
00:14:01,629 --> 00:14:04,007
it's already gone.
308
00:14:08,150 --> 00:14:09,091
Hello?
309
00:14:09,128 --> 00:14:10,271
Hi.
310
00:14:10,301 --> 00:14:13,965
I'm at the Central
Park Carousel and...
311
00:14:14,497 --> 00:14:16,330
I'm having a little bit of an issue.
312
00:14:16,336 --> 00:14:17,786
Uh, what kind of issue?
313
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:20,709
Actually, it's a long story...
314
00:14:20,724 --> 00:14:22,787
Um, Robin, listen,
I'm-I'm late for a big meeting.
315
00:14:22,804 --> 00:14:24,168
Is it important?
316
00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:27,040
Nah, it's stupid.
317
00:14:27,114 --> 00:14:28,813
Good luck.
318
00:14:30,167 --> 00:14:32,215
All right, here's the bottom
line, cockroaches.
319
00:14:32,241 --> 00:14:34,074
There's no end in sight
320
00:14:34,212 --> 00:14:36,431
and we've got no provisions.
321
00:14:36,622 --> 00:14:38,400
If it comes down to it,
322
00:14:38,498 --> 00:14:41,251
I need a volunteer
to let the rest of us...
323
00:14:41,336 --> 00:14:42,237
eat him.
324
00:14:42,243 --> 00:14:44,198
Barney's team seems way more fun.
325
00:14:44,222 --> 00:14:45,104
Nonsense.
326
00:14:45,127 --> 00:14:46,752
Candy for everyone!
327
00:14:47,777 --> 00:14:50,236
Okay, Team Animal
House... who wants to try a cigar?
328
00:14:50,248 --> 00:14:51,935
- Yeah!
- Yay!
329
00:14:51,955 --> 00:14:53,994
I'm not saying we're gonna
start with your face or anything,
330
00:14:54,017 --> 00:14:57,592
but is there seriously no one here willing
to give up a hand or a foot?
331
00:14:57,628 --> 00:14:59,399
We're outta here!
332
00:15:22,116 --> 00:15:24,141
Ted, why are you here?
333
00:15:24,149 --> 00:15:26,462
You had that meeting,
I told you not to come.
334
00:15:26,497 --> 00:15:28,016
You said, "Nah, it's stupid,"
335
00:15:28,044 --> 00:15:30,939
which is Robin-ese
for, "It's important".
336
00:15:31,047 --> 00:15:32,707
Everyone knows that.
337
00:15:34,791 --> 00:15:37,310
Well... not everyone.
338
00:15:38,207 --> 00:15:41,226
But you shouldn't have skipped
that meeting. Was it important?
339
00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:43,369
Nah, it's stupid.
340
00:15:44,582 --> 00:15:47,193
And yet, my future husband...
341
00:15:47,225 --> 00:15:49,938
who I sometimes fear
is troublingly similar
342
00:15:49,950 --> 00:15:52,594
to my emotionally unavailable father...
343
00:15:52,627 --> 00:15:55,713
is off shooting laser guns with,
oh, yeah, you guessed it:
344
00:15:55,725 --> 00:15:57,763
my emotionally unavailable father.
345
00:15:57,787 --> 00:15:59,112
Oh, come on, that's not fair.
346
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:02,218
If you told Barney that you
needed him, he'd be here in a heartbeat.
347
00:16:02,457 --> 00:16:04,423
I didn't have to tell you.
348
00:16:05,209 --> 00:16:07,069
And you're here.
349
00:16:07,737 --> 00:16:09,604
You don't even know why.
350
00:16:11,719 --> 00:16:14,344
Seems like I'm here to dig.
351
00:16:26,739 --> 00:16:29,023
Looking for "D" s?
352
00:16:30,577 --> 00:16:33,108
Long story short, I
promised my future self
353
00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:36,027
the locket would be my "something
old" at my wedding.
354
00:16:37,379 --> 00:16:38,654
What?
355
00:16:39,087 --> 00:16:41,775
No, I just like that
there was ever a version of you
356
00:16:41,793 --> 00:16:44,658
who imagined having a "something
old" at your wedding.
357
00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:46,809
Robin Scherbatsky...
358
00:16:46,834 --> 00:16:47,765
you're a girl.
359
00:16:47,783 --> 00:16:49,789
- Shut up. You're a girl.
- That's been established.
360
00:16:49,807 --> 00:16:53,377
The new information
here is that you're a girl.
361
00:16:55,823 --> 00:16:57,607
Wait... is that...?
362
00:16:57,652 --> 00:16:59,593
Oh, my God, I found it.
363
00:17:02,841 --> 00:17:04,484
Okay...
364
00:17:04,996 --> 00:17:06,979
what's really going
on with this locket?
365
00:17:09,698 --> 00:17:12,719
I'm gonna admit something that I
couldn't admit until I found this.
366
00:17:13,702 --> 00:17:16,581
I've been having
fears about marrying Barney.
367
00:17:17,235 --> 00:17:21,672
I mean, in many ways, he's-he's
grown up into a mature, caring adult...
368
00:17:21,735 --> 00:17:24,934
I'm gonna shoot you with your own gun.
369
00:17:27,474 --> 00:17:30,007
but I still don't
know if he's ready for this.
370
00:17:30,733 --> 00:17:33,151
I still don't know if I am.
371
00:17:33,731 --> 00:17:36,055
But if I could find this locket...
372
00:17:36,137 --> 00:17:38,787
if it was still here, waiting for me...
373
00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:42,232
that would mean that the
Universe wanted me to marry Barney.
374
00:17:42,281 --> 00:17:44,398
And that everything was gonna be okay.
375
00:17:45,745 --> 00:17:48,380
And when it was gone, it was like...
376
00:17:48,699 --> 00:17:51,991
every doubt I ever had about Barney,
377
00:17:52,015 --> 00:17:54,738
about myself, got dug up.
378
00:17:56,122 --> 00:17:58,030
But I found it.
379
00:17:58,475 --> 00:18:00,687
And everything's gonna be okay.
380
00:18:03,307 --> 00:18:05,355
Any last words?
381
00:18:05,380 --> 00:18:07,052
You know, seeing you on
the field of battle...
382
00:18:07,071 --> 00:18:10,252
ruthless, manipulative, untrustworthy...
383
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:13,745
you've got all the
qualities I would've wanted in a son.
384
00:18:14,422 --> 00:18:16,462
Now I say to you
385
00:18:16,481 --> 00:18:18,925
the last words my father said to me:
386
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:21,377
"Shoot me already".
387
00:18:21,962 --> 00:18:23,418
Or we could
388
00:18:23,568 --> 00:18:25,427
keep playing, if you want.
389
00:18:25,517 --> 00:18:28,114
Nah, it's stupid.
390
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,072
Okay, Team Animal House, I got him!
391
00:18:31,090 --> 00:18:32,603
Come on out!
392
00:18:32,630 --> 00:18:34,587
You're point guy, R-dawg.
393
00:18:35,151 --> 00:18:36,639
Woof, woof.
394
00:18:58,304 --> 00:19:00,357
Oh, thank God.
395
00:19:12,873 --> 00:19:15,788
- This is a sign from the Universe.
- It's not a sign from the Universe...
396
00:19:15,820 --> 00:19:18,227
Yes, it is!
The-the locket is just gone
397
00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:20,548
and you're telling me that
doesn't mean anything?
398
00:19:20,611 --> 00:19:23,681
You know this is a bad
omen, Ted... you're Universe Guy!
399
00:19:23,687 --> 00:19:24,935
And you're Skeptic Girl!
400
00:19:24,940 --> 00:19:26,663
You're-you're not
supposed to believe any of that.
401
00:19:26,681 --> 00:19:29,812
Well, maybe I've grown skeptical
of being skeptical.
402
00:19:30,455 --> 00:19:32,011
This is a sign.
403
00:19:32,029 --> 00:19:35,654
Look, it's not a sign. You're
doing the right thing marrying Barney.
404
00:19:35,686 --> 00:19:38,311
The Universe isn't
sending you some message.
405
00:19:41,747 --> 00:19:43,651
As we know from science,
406
00:19:43,865 --> 00:19:47,243
rain is liquid water in
the form of droplets
407
00:19:47,261 --> 00:19:50,701
which have condensed from
atmospheric vapor and then precipitated.
408
00:19:50,707 --> 00:19:51,789
It's not a sign.
409
00:19:51,813 --> 00:19:55,190
Ted, this is a sign and you know it.
410
00:19:55,300 --> 00:19:58,502
I mean, the Universe is screaming
at me right now!
411
00:19:58,514 --> 00:20:01,989
How-how-how can you, of all people,
tell me to ignore that?
412
00:20:02,024 --> 00:20:05,559
Because maybe it's dumb to
look for "signs from the Universe".
413
00:20:05,692 --> 00:20:08,170
I mean, maybe the
Universe has better things to do.
414
00:20:08,188 --> 00:20:10,401
Dear God, I hope it does.
415
00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:13,701
Do you know how many "signs" I've gotten that
I should or shouldn't be with someone?
416
00:20:13,719 --> 00:20:15,988
And where has it gotten me?
417
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,435
Maybe there aren't any signs. Maybe...
418
00:20:19,607 --> 00:20:21,942
maybe a locket's just a locket,
419
00:20:21,973 --> 00:20:24,173
a chair is just a chair.
420
00:20:24,713 --> 00:20:28,418
Maybe we don't have to give meaning
to every little thing.
421
00:20:29,132 --> 00:20:30,558
Maybe we don't...
422
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:32,492
maybe we don't need the Universe
423
00:20:32,519 --> 00:20:34,919
to tell us what we really want.
424
00:20:35,028 --> 00:20:37,078
Maybe we already know that,
425
00:20:37,103 --> 00:20:38,866
deep down.
426
00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:43,035
# Sharpen them with lies
427
00:20:46,783 --> 00:20:51,562
# And whatever's going down
428
00:20:54,861 --> 00:20:58,490
# Will follow you around
429
00:20:58,714 --> 00:21:02,603
# That's how you fight loneliness... #