1 00:00:52,114 --> 00:00:55,427 Ah. Morning. 2 00:00:55,451 --> 00:00:57,346 Good to your word. 3 00:00:57,370 --> 00:00:59,056 I thought you might have stopped our breakfasts 4 00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:02,184 as some sort of continuation of your brutality against me 5 00:01:02,208 --> 00:01:03,727 from the other day. 6 00:01:03,751 --> 00:01:05,479 I lost my way a little. 7 00:01:05,503 --> 00:01:07,981 I am back, reason itself. 8 00:01:08,005 --> 00:01:09,691 Apology accepted. 9 00:01:09,715 --> 00:01:11,526 And yet not actually given. 10 00:01:11,550 --> 00:01:12,527 Hello, Paul. 11 00:01:12,551 --> 00:01:14,591 Can we go see how the nursery is coming along today? 12 00:01:15,221 --> 00:01:18,450 - Under guard. Yes. - Hmm. 13 00:01:18,474 --> 00:01:19,850 Exciting. 14 00:01:20,768 --> 00:01:23,580 Sort of unimaginable, this, in here, 15 00:01:23,604 --> 00:01:26,166 will be a walking, talking being. 16 00:01:26,190 --> 00:01:29,294 Also, a singing, dancing, hunting, and fucking one. 17 00:01:29,318 --> 00:01:32,381 Or reading, writing, philosophizing, philanthropic one. 18 00:01:32,405 --> 00:01:35,050 - Hmm. Well, he will be extraordinary. 19 00:01:35,074 --> 00:01:37,261 Ah. We finally agree. 20 00:01:37,285 --> 00:01:40,555 It must be strange, a human creature inside you. 21 00:01:40,579 --> 00:01:43,976 Do you ever think, "What if he has a knife?" Hmm? 22 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:46,544 - I never do. - Mm. 23 00:01:47,336 --> 00:01:51,024 It does rush one with intense feelings of all kinds, though. 24 00:01:51,048 --> 00:01:53,342 This fucking apricot is rushing me with intense feeling. 25 00:01:54,635 --> 00:01:58,889 Close your eyes and imagine you are eating the softest, ripest pussy. 26 00:01:59,724 --> 00:02:00,742 I... 27 00:02:00,766 --> 00:02:02,703 probably won't do that. 28 00:02:02,727 --> 00:02:05,605 I'm actually late for my Diderot breakfast. 29 00:02:20,244 --> 00:02:24,182 I believe we can create a great nation 30 00:02:24,206 --> 00:02:26,292 to rival France. 31 00:02:27,084 --> 00:02:31,648 We can have our own philosophers who boldly think the unthought, 32 00:02:31,672 --> 00:02:34,651 scientists who discover the unimaginable. 33 00:02:34,675 --> 00:02:37,988 We must learn from the best these countries have to offer 34 00:02:38,012 --> 00:02:41,617 and sally forth to a new Russia on their shoulders. 35 00:02:41,641 --> 00:02:45,662 So... let us discuss the Diderot pamphlet you all were to read. 36 00:02:45,686 --> 00:02:47,229 First thoughts? 37 00:02:50,858 --> 00:02:54,004 We are rebuilding Russia, and I wish you to be steeped 38 00:02:54,028 --> 00:02:56,548 in these enlightened ideas as I am, 39 00:02:56,572 --> 00:02:59,116 for that is the soil we plant our Russia in. 40 00:02:59,533 --> 00:03:03,204 So, any ideas at all in the pamphlet which spoke to you. 41 00:03:06,290 --> 00:03:08,810 - If I may? - Of course. 42 00:03:08,834 --> 00:03:11,563 Archbishop of Court, Basil. 43 00:03:11,587 --> 00:03:13,148 - Fucker. - Him? 44 00:03:13,172 --> 00:03:14,691 Her. 45 00:03:14,715 --> 00:03:17,611 Diderot has not much time for priests, 46 00:03:17,635 --> 00:03:21,198 but I am forgiving of anyone bringing truth. 47 00:03:21,222 --> 00:03:24,493 God, ideas, vodka... 48 00:03:25,477 --> 00:03:27,579 ...all elevate the soul. 49 00:03:27,603 --> 00:03:29,122 Huzzah! 50 00:03:29,146 --> 00:03:30,582 Huzzah! 51 00:03:30,606 --> 00:03:31,959 Huzzah, indeed! 52 00:03:31,983 --> 00:03:33,567 Who else? 53 00:03:40,366 --> 00:03:41,826 Raskolvy? 54 00:03:42,535 --> 00:03:44,221 Yes, marvelous. 55 00:03:44,245 --> 00:03:46,974 What was, in particular? 56 00:03:46,998 --> 00:03:48,725 The pamphlet. 57 00:03:48,749 --> 00:03:50,602 Generally and particularly. 58 00:03:50,626 --> 00:03:53,146 E-Everyone read it, did they not? 59 00:03:55,172 --> 00:03:58,134 A freewheeling discourse can be a giddying thing. 60 00:04:02,388 --> 00:04:04,116 I have something. 61 00:04:04,140 --> 00:04:05,158 You do? 62 00:04:05,182 --> 00:04:08,036 It is entitled Thoughts of an Ex-Emperor. 63 00:04:08,060 --> 00:04:09,413 What's this? 64 00:04:09,437 --> 00:04:13,542 "As I lay here in my imprisonment, I think often of the court 65 00:04:13,566 --> 00:04:15,669 "and how much I love them. 66 00:04:15,693 --> 00:04:19,905 "Who can remember the pig and hazelnut orgy of 1756? 67 00:04:20,531 --> 00:04:25,012 The court slept for days after, slick with pig fat and empty nuts." 68 00:04:25,036 --> 00:04:26,430 Shut him down. 69 00:04:26,454 --> 00:04:28,181 I asked them to share their thoughts. 70 00:04:28,205 --> 00:04:29,641 Not Peter's thoughts. 71 00:04:29,665 --> 00:04:32,311 "I remember when the influenza bug swept the court. 72 00:04:32,335 --> 00:04:36,565 "I immediately ordered every vapor bowl to be filled with Scottish whisky. 73 00:04:36,589 --> 00:04:38,066 "We managed to enjoy our sickness 74 00:04:38,090 --> 00:04:40,027 and several babies were conceived that very night." 75 00:04:41,427 --> 00:04:43,822 - Thank you, Grigor. We shall move on. 76 00:04:43,846 --> 00:04:47,451 Uh, well, I thank you for the freedom of expression you have allowed to flower. 77 00:04:47,475 --> 00:04:51,747 I will place some around the court for your reading pleasure. 78 00:04:51,771 --> 00:04:53,916 Huzzah! To Catherine! 79 00:04:53,940 --> 00:04:55,650 Huzzah! 80 00:05:03,074 --> 00:05:04,843 Grigor. What was that? 81 00:05:04,867 --> 00:05:06,386 Ah, I just thought it would be fun. 82 00:05:06,410 --> 00:05:08,263 I didn't have any of my own thoughts, so... 83 00:05:08,287 --> 00:05:10,474 Get some! Read Diderot. 84 00:05:10,498 --> 00:05:11,892 I will. 85 00:05:11,916 --> 00:05:13,751 Did Peter put you up to this? 86 00:05:15,711 --> 00:05:17,689 Between us, he suffers. 87 00:05:17,713 --> 00:05:18,650 He is missing the court. 88 00:05:18,674 --> 00:05:20,692 I thought it might be a bit of harmless fun. 89 00:05:20,716 --> 00:05:23,153 I could report back the court was amused. 90 00:05:23,177 --> 00:05:24,821 It might be good they remember him. 91 00:05:24,845 --> 00:05:27,348 The nightmare should not recede in people's minds. 92 00:05:29,016 --> 00:05:31,018 I don't like it. Don't do it again. 93 00:05:31,769 --> 00:05:33,229 Understood. 94 00:05:33,938 --> 00:05:35,523 You did not go with Georgina? 95 00:05:37,608 --> 00:05:38,877 No. 96 00:05:38,901 --> 00:05:40,754 You were banished with her. 97 00:05:40,778 --> 00:05:44,675 I ask, Your Grace, to remain. 98 00:05:44,699 --> 00:05:46,200 You chose to stay? 99 00:05:46,701 --> 00:05:47,952 I... 100 00:05:48,828 --> 00:05:50,079 couldn't leave him. 101 00:05:51,038 --> 00:05:53,124 At least you realized who you loved. 102 00:05:56,002 --> 00:05:58,397 I mean, I don't get it. 103 00:05:58,421 --> 00:06:01,984 I suppose some might find him handsome in that sort of general, 104 00:06:02,008 --> 00:06:05,445 symmetrical features, and deep brown eyes sort of way, 105 00:06:05,469 --> 00:06:08,639 but... I'm sure people will see through him soon enough. 106 00:06:09,807 --> 00:06:11,243 Can you kill him? 107 00:06:11,267 --> 00:06:13,996 No. She'd immediately suspect me. 108 00:06:14,020 --> 00:06:16,582 Besides, he seems a simple fellow. 109 00:06:16,606 --> 00:06:19,650 A pawn in her much larger game. 110 00:06:20,776 --> 00:06:22,087 I know that look. 111 00:06:22,111 --> 00:06:23,422 Don't you fucking dare. 112 00:06:23,446 --> 00:06:25,674 No plots to crush my best friend. 113 00:06:25,698 --> 00:06:27,759 I thought I was your best friend? 114 00:06:27,783 --> 00:06:30,095 You are also, which makes this awfully difficult for me, 115 00:06:30,119 --> 00:06:32,055 so let's think about me in this. 116 00:06:32,079 --> 00:06:35,183 She is backing me into a corner, and you know how I hate that. 117 00:06:35,207 --> 00:06:36,375 No, no, no... 118 00:06:37,335 --> 00:06:40,981 She is stubborn, yes, but she is also brilliant. 119 00:06:41,005 --> 00:06:44,776 If you found a way to work with her, she would listen in ways that Peter never did. 120 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:48,322 You both love boring conversations, and even more boring books. 121 00:06:48,346 --> 00:06:50,699 - You should get on well. - Are you finished? 122 00:06:50,723 --> 00:06:53,118 No. It would also make me very happy, 123 00:06:53,142 --> 00:06:55,728 which should be everyone's top priority, really. 124 00:06:56,812 --> 00:06:59,273 I'm done with this little experiment. 125 00:07:00,191 --> 00:07:01,752 Agree entirely. 126 00:07:01,776 --> 00:07:03,587 She treated you badly. 127 00:07:03,611 --> 00:07:06,214 - Can we just kill her now, then? - No, we cannot. 128 00:07:06,238 --> 00:07:09,426 Grigor read my pamphlet, that is the first part of the plan. 129 00:07:09,450 --> 00:07:11,470 - And killing her is the second part? - No, Arkady! 130 00:07:11,494 --> 00:07:13,305 Her failing is the first part, 131 00:07:13,329 --> 00:07:15,641 me helping her do that is the second part, 132 00:07:15,665 --> 00:07:18,060 and being together and in love with a not-dead Catherine 133 00:07:18,084 --> 00:07:19,061 is the third part. 134 00:07:19,085 --> 00:07:20,854 Fuck me, can you listen? 135 00:07:20,878 --> 00:07:22,314 Apologies. 136 00:07:24,256 --> 00:07:25,943 The women were slick with want 137 00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:28,570 and the men hungry for your return to power. 138 00:07:28,594 --> 00:07:30,447 - I'm a good time. Good to remind them. 139 00:07:30,471 --> 00:07:32,324 You will win back the court. 140 00:07:32,348 --> 00:07:34,618 - I never lost the court. I lost the throne. 141 00:07:34,642 --> 00:07:37,287 And I didn't lose it, I lent it temporarily. 142 00:07:37,311 --> 00:07:39,647 What is your point? Because so far, I hate it. 143 00:07:40,231 --> 00:07:41,899 I don't really have a point. 144 00:07:42,566 --> 00:07:45,170 Other than, we must raise you back up! 145 00:07:45,194 --> 00:07:47,631 I thought the harsh treatment she gave you, 146 00:07:47,655 --> 00:07:50,717 the kicking, the locking in, the destruction of Mommy... 147 00:07:50,741 --> 00:07:52,302 it is not on! 148 00:07:52,326 --> 00:07:54,554 I will tell you a strange thing. 149 00:07:54,578 --> 00:07:58,225 Her ruthlessness just makes me see how perfect we are together. 150 00:07:58,249 --> 00:08:02,271 As they were kicking the shit out of me, I looked up and into her eyes, 151 00:08:02,295 --> 00:08:06,799 and the cold blue of it made me shiver in a sexual way I have not known. 152 00:08:09,719 --> 00:08:12,322 Well, if you flinch, it's going to screw up the trajectory! 153 00:08:12,346 --> 00:08:13,472 That one's your fault. 154 00:08:14,056 --> 00:08:15,141 Apologies. 155 00:08:16,058 --> 00:08:18,495 She trapped me in my rooms like a prisoner. 156 00:08:18,519 --> 00:08:21,123 No one should have that power over me, even if I love them. 157 00:08:21,147 --> 00:08:23,542 Unless, of course, I've granted it to them in sexual sport, 158 00:08:23,566 --> 00:08:25,043 which I once did with George. 159 00:08:25,067 --> 00:08:29,089 She then came to me wet as spring rain and bent over the desk, 160 00:08:29,113 --> 00:08:31,800 and I fucked her with such savagery it frightened me. 161 00:08:31,824 --> 00:08:35,661 And yet after she whispered to me so softly, "Thank you." 162 00:08:36,579 --> 00:08:37,913 It was very sweet. 163 00:08:38,413 --> 00:08:40,183 Are you missing her, Grigor? 164 00:08:40,207 --> 00:08:43,520 I don't know, I'm still immersed in your story. 165 00:08:43,544 --> 00:08:44,754 Eh, it's how I tell them. 166 00:08:45,671 --> 00:08:47,524 Yeah, her party was a failure. 167 00:08:47,548 --> 00:08:49,192 I'll have a party. 168 00:08:49,216 --> 00:08:51,278 Everyone loved my parties almost as much as they loved me. 169 00:08:51,302 --> 00:08:52,988 Absolutely. 170 00:08:53,012 --> 00:08:54,531 A wonderful plan, 171 00:08:54,555 --> 00:08:58,201 only slightly dampened by the fact of your exile in your apartments 172 00:08:58,225 --> 00:09:00,495 and no one, apart from us, are actually allowed to visit. 173 00:09:00,519 --> 00:09:03,206 I will not continue to share my grand visions with you 174 00:09:03,230 --> 00:09:06,400 if you act like piddling sticklers over minor details. 175 00:09:09,487 --> 00:09:14,134 Your meeting with the Ottoman ambassador is, uh... 176 00:09:14,158 --> 00:09:17,679 I'm sorry, it's very odd to speak to you when you're seated like that. 177 00:09:17,703 --> 00:09:21,183 It's very odd to feel your lungs being crushed like an accordion into your throat 178 00:09:21,207 --> 00:09:24,168 by a foreign invading creature who has taken over your body. 179 00:09:24,794 --> 00:09:28,297 So we must all adjust to some degree of oddness, don't you agree? 180 00:09:28,923 --> 00:09:31,443 Ambassador Sunduk arrives today. 181 00:09:31,467 --> 00:09:34,154 What the fuck is that smell? 182 00:09:34,178 --> 00:09:38,408 Leeches, to alleviate the pressure on her lower pelvic region. 183 00:09:38,432 --> 00:09:40,494 Oh, right. Of course. 184 00:09:40,518 --> 00:09:41,954 Sorry. 185 00:09:41,978 --> 00:09:45,374 I appreciate you all adjusting so uncomplainingly 186 00:09:45,398 --> 00:09:47,251 to what must be so difficult 187 00:09:47,275 --> 00:09:49,544 and inconvenient for entire minutes of your day. 188 00:09:49,568 --> 00:09:51,046 Dirt? 189 00:09:51,070 --> 00:09:52,238 Yes. 190 00:09:55,408 --> 00:09:58,369 The Ottomans will never come round to you leading Russia. 191 00:09:58,995 --> 00:10:01,515 They believe a woman's place is on a man's face. 192 00:10:01,539 --> 00:10:04,142 - You're wrong. They view cunnilingus as a mortal sin. 193 00:10:04,166 --> 00:10:05,644 They call it the Devil's Lunch. 194 00:10:05,668 --> 00:10:09,982 And yet it is, of course, a fabulous meal any time of night or day. 195 00:10:11,048 --> 00:10:13,068 The ambassador will meet me 196 00:10:13,092 --> 00:10:15,946 and be charmed, and love me, like everyone does. 197 00:10:15,970 --> 00:10:18,907 - Absolutely. And Sunduk is a worldly man, 198 00:10:18,931 --> 00:10:22,744 speaks seven languages, a legend among diplomats. 199 00:10:22,768 --> 00:10:25,163 This whole meeting is pointless. 200 00:10:25,187 --> 00:10:27,124 Ever since you've come into power, 201 00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:30,794 the Ottomans have encroached on our border regions. 202 00:10:30,818 --> 00:10:33,529 Attack first, show strength. 203 00:10:34,488 --> 00:10:37,342 Or I will show intelligence and reason 204 00:10:37,366 --> 00:10:41,179 and help them see what great friends our empires can be to one another. 205 00:10:41,203 --> 00:10:44,808 Recall our greater aims, Velementov. 206 00:10:44,832 --> 00:10:46,435 War is not one of them. 207 00:10:46,459 --> 00:10:47,686 Indeed. 208 00:10:47,710 --> 00:10:50,272 A reminder that I am sure you don't need, 209 00:10:50,296 --> 00:10:55,986 but it's about presenting a front to the Ottomans of stability and reason. 210 00:10:56,010 --> 00:10:58,679 And of course, Velementov and I will be there to share the load. 211 00:11:00,556 --> 00:11:04,828 My dear, you are a blossom that has never grown in this garden before. 212 00:11:04,852 --> 00:11:08,332 No need to twist and turn your glory 213 00:11:08,356 --> 00:11:10,876 to impress a man who cannot see. 214 00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:12,669 Are you almost done, Elizabeth? 215 00:11:12,693 --> 00:11:16,506 I agree we don't need to impress, other than by attacking, 216 00:11:16,530 --> 00:11:18,926 with a plan of such elegance and violence, 217 00:11:18,950 --> 00:11:21,452 they will weep at their foolishness at goading me. 218 00:11:22,954 --> 00:11:24,264 Are you sucking on a nail? 219 00:11:24,288 --> 00:11:27,225 I am, and I will not be shamed. 220 00:11:27,249 --> 00:11:31,671 Certainly not, for the sense of shame could be transmitted to the baby. 221 00:11:32,254 --> 00:11:34,483 - I have met with the Sultan. - Really? 222 00:11:34,507 --> 00:11:36,234 We were actually in a meeting. 223 00:11:36,258 --> 00:11:38,320 I'm sure this is a great story for a luncheon, but... 224 00:11:38,344 --> 00:11:42,616 Peter the Great took me with him to Constantinople for meetings. 225 00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:46,495 One night at dinner, Peter the Great was out of the room. 226 00:11:46,519 --> 00:11:48,538 I reached for some cake, 227 00:11:48,562 --> 00:11:51,208 and the Sultan grabbed my hand, 228 00:11:51,232 --> 00:11:54,962 bit it hard, and spat in my face. 229 00:11:54,986 --> 00:11:59,883 Said some strange word, which I believe translated means "pig slut." 230 00:11:59,907 --> 00:12:02,594 Pig slut? Are you serious? 231 00:12:02,618 --> 00:12:06,556 Apparently, women could only get cake after the horses had their fill. 232 00:12:06,580 --> 00:12:08,225 It is the culture. 233 00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,060 Men lead. 234 00:12:10,084 --> 00:12:13,796 That is why it is best I lead the negotiations. 235 00:12:14,547 --> 00:12:16,465 I have a better idea. 236 00:12:17,258 --> 00:12:18,568 This is a bad idea. 237 00:12:18,592 --> 00:12:20,529 It is an insult to them. 238 00:12:20,553 --> 00:12:22,531 If it precipitates war, I'm all for it. 239 00:12:22,555 --> 00:12:25,325 What a surprising position for you to take. 240 00:12:49,790 --> 00:12:52,644 - Ambassador Sunduk. - Empress. 241 00:12:52,668 --> 00:12:54,170 Such an honor to meet you. 242 00:13:01,385 --> 00:13:02,529 I am confused. 243 00:13:02,553 --> 00:13:04,531 That my chief advisors are women? 244 00:13:04,555 --> 00:13:06,658 Yes. That it is not Orlo. 245 00:13:06,682 --> 00:13:09,119 Yes. Well, I do still have an integral role here. 246 00:13:09,143 --> 00:13:11,437 It's mostly an odd seating arrangement issue. 247 00:13:12,229 --> 00:13:14,124 It is something of an insult. 248 00:13:14,148 --> 00:13:17,628 Hmm. This arrangement. 249 00:13:17,652 --> 00:13:20,130 Really? We actually love it. 250 00:13:20,154 --> 00:13:23,258 God is everywhere, so sidelining the Church to the wall 251 00:13:23,282 --> 00:13:24,700 is no insult at all. 252 00:13:25,743 --> 00:13:29,830 Diplomacy is the art of neutral approach, 253 00:13:31,165 --> 00:13:36,087 of delicacy to other people's feelings for the... 254 00:13:37,004 --> 00:13:38,506 ease of relations. 255 00:13:40,091 --> 00:13:43,111 - Thanks for explaining. - Something I already knew. 256 00:13:43,135 --> 00:13:47,032 I view diplomacy as a clearing of old prejudices, 257 00:13:47,056 --> 00:13:51,536 so that a new understanding can come forth between our two great empires. 258 00:13:51,560 --> 00:13:53,229 That's my view. 259 00:13:53,938 --> 00:13:57,626 These Ottoman encroachments on our border regions will end immediately. 260 00:13:57,650 --> 00:13:58,752 Local warlords. 261 00:13:58,776 --> 00:14:02,297 Unfortunately, nothing the Sultan or I can do about it. 262 00:14:02,321 --> 00:14:06,760 You know how it is, running these big empires. 263 00:14:06,784 --> 00:14:08,011 Fringe groups. 264 00:14:08,035 --> 00:14:11,265 Pillaging Russian villages could be construed as an act of war. 265 00:14:11,289 --> 00:14:12,849 I hardly think it's that serious. 266 00:14:12,873 --> 00:14:14,476 You're not living in the villages, are you? 267 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:17,896 - Velementov. Hankering for war, no doubt. 268 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:21,549 - To defend Russia. - After the Swedish debacle? 269 00:14:22,216 --> 00:14:26,029 I'm sure the Sultan has sufficient strength to hold his regions together. 270 00:14:26,053 --> 00:14:28,115 A woman questioning the Sultan's powers? 271 00:14:28,139 --> 00:14:31,159 She has a biting intelligence, our Empress. 272 00:14:31,183 --> 00:14:32,828 He should appreciate it. 273 00:14:32,852 --> 00:14:34,162 Indeed. 274 00:14:34,186 --> 00:14:35,914 Ah! 275 00:14:35,938 --> 00:14:38,333 The Sultan has sent a gift for the baby. 276 00:14:38,357 --> 00:14:41,587 We are aware of your love of horses. 277 00:14:41,611 --> 00:14:44,840 - How dare you! - You rude piece of shit! 278 00:14:54,081 --> 00:14:56,184 Thank you so much. 279 00:14:56,208 --> 00:14:58,186 What an incredibly thoughtful gift. 280 00:14:58,210 --> 00:15:01,231 It is good to see a German with a sense of humor. 281 00:15:01,255 --> 00:15:03,108 I consider myself Russian 282 00:15:03,132 --> 00:15:07,446 and always willing to find a path of peace rather than rage. 283 00:15:07,470 --> 00:15:10,949 Unusual, for both Russians and Germans, 284 00:15:10,973 --> 00:15:14,953 but you seem an exquisite anomaly in all categories. 285 00:15:14,977 --> 00:15:18,957 God graced us with a leader who defies all categorization. 286 00:15:18,981 --> 00:15:22,252 - Oh, Archie! I completely forgot you were here. 287 00:15:22,276 --> 00:15:23,486 So far away. 288 00:15:24,195 --> 00:15:26,173 Will you have dinner with me tonight? 289 00:15:26,197 --> 00:15:27,716 I would love to. 290 00:15:27,740 --> 00:15:30,761 Ah. A feast has been prepared, 291 00:15:30,785 --> 00:15:33,889 with anchovies, served fried, grilled, baked, souped, stewed, 292 00:15:33,913 --> 00:15:35,641 steamed, smoked and salted. 293 00:15:35,665 --> 00:15:39,853 Twenty-seven different kinds of pilaf, and for dessert, ashure. 294 00:15:39,877 --> 00:15:40,979 What a treat. 295 00:15:41,003 --> 00:15:44,483 My country's delicacies but prepared by foreigners. 296 00:15:44,507 --> 00:15:45,633 Thank you, Orlo. 297 00:15:46,676 --> 00:15:50,221 I trust it will be just me and the Empress? 298 00:15:51,639 --> 00:15:53,015 Of course. 299 00:16:03,276 --> 00:16:04,461 He liked me, Orlo. 300 00:16:04,485 --> 00:16:06,922 We can do a deal. Did you not think? 301 00:16:06,946 --> 00:16:09,216 I did. It's fucking annoying. 302 00:16:09,240 --> 00:16:11,260 We definitely offended him. 303 00:16:11,284 --> 00:16:13,661 I can tell he's smarter than that. 304 00:16:15,538 --> 00:16:17,432 Empress, a word? 305 00:16:17,456 --> 00:16:19,643 All right. My word is no. 306 00:16:19,667 --> 00:16:23,188 - Ah, off to a good start. I forgot something in the State Room. 307 00:16:23,212 --> 00:16:25,857 If you'll excuse me before I have to make up what it is. 308 00:16:25,881 --> 00:16:28,652 Empress, such steady leadership! 309 00:16:28,676 --> 00:16:32,572 Your handling of the ambassador was a lesson in diplomacy and... 310 00:16:32,596 --> 00:16:35,224 - What is it? - About Basil. 311 00:16:36,475 --> 00:16:39,288 - He is here to stay. - Yes, of course. 312 00:16:39,312 --> 00:16:42,040 And I am thrilled he is to be working with us. 313 00:16:42,064 --> 00:16:43,458 What? 314 00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:44,835 The demands on my time are great 315 00:16:44,859 --> 00:16:46,795 and though his presence here was initially a shock, 316 00:16:46,819 --> 00:16:50,406 I've realized I would be glad to share my vision for the church with him. 317 00:16:51,032 --> 00:16:53,135 What is your game here, Archie? 318 00:16:53,159 --> 00:16:54,845 No game. 319 00:16:54,869 --> 00:16:58,432 Just, um, a reevaluation. 320 00:16:58,456 --> 00:17:00,267 It's exhausting, this conflict, 321 00:17:00,291 --> 00:17:03,228 and I fear it will lead Russia down a dark path. 322 00:17:03,252 --> 00:17:05,087 And you to an early grave. 323 00:17:05,630 --> 00:17:08,275 And Marial seems to think we can settle it. 324 00:17:08,299 --> 00:17:10,777 Uncharacteristically optimistic of her. 325 00:17:10,801 --> 00:17:14,764 Is it not a sign, perhaps, that we are both her closest friends? 326 00:17:15,473 --> 00:17:17,241 Mm, I don't think so. 327 00:17:17,265 --> 00:17:20,537 Marial also likes to eat sheep brains in cream. 328 00:17:20,561 --> 00:17:24,458 Sometimes I must forgive her, her bad taste, and move on. 329 00:17:24,482 --> 00:17:28,527 - I hold out my hand in friendship. I do not want to close it into a fist. 330 00:17:29,111 --> 00:17:30,464 Is that a threat? 331 00:17:30,488 --> 00:17:33,967 A desperate plea for peace between us. 332 00:17:33,991 --> 00:17:35,409 Oh, funny. 333 00:17:40,790 --> 00:17:42,267 Oh! Oh! 334 00:17:49,757 --> 00:17:51,008 Oh. 335 00:17:51,634 --> 00:17:52,653 Gosh. 336 00:17:52,677 --> 00:17:54,345 Indeed. 337 00:17:55,638 --> 00:17:59,743 I must say I was a tad surprised at your interest. I... 338 00:17:59,767 --> 00:18:02,144 Shot my husband in the head at close range? 339 00:18:03,437 --> 00:18:04,665 Yes. 340 00:18:04,689 --> 00:18:10,170 It is strange, but I found myself daydreaming of fucking you often since. 341 00:18:10,194 --> 00:18:11,672 It is a strange grief, 342 00:18:11,696 --> 00:18:14,675 anger at my idiot husband for getting himself killed. 343 00:18:14,699 --> 00:18:16,802 I decided to give into it. 344 00:18:16,826 --> 00:18:18,077 I see. 345 00:18:19,287 --> 00:18:21,122 Well, I'm grateful. 346 00:18:21,998 --> 00:18:23,183 You are... 347 00:18:23,207 --> 00:18:24,851 Beautiful and a great fuck. 348 00:18:24,875 --> 00:18:26,103 I know. 349 00:18:26,127 --> 00:18:28,129 Exactly. 350 00:18:28,838 --> 00:18:33,050 It is a new day for all of us, a new court. 351 00:18:34,051 --> 00:18:36,029 How is she to work for? 352 00:18:36,053 --> 00:18:37,364 She is extraordinary. 353 00:18:37,388 --> 00:18:41,326 Of course, she is a woman and slower to fight than some, 354 00:18:41,350 --> 00:18:45,163 but... I bow to her brilliance. 355 00:18:45,187 --> 00:18:49,501 My husband said you were brilliant, constantly stymied by Peter. 356 00:18:49,525 --> 00:18:52,129 I hope you have free rein this time. 357 00:18:52,153 --> 00:18:53,505 The Ottomans would be formidable. 358 00:18:53,529 --> 00:18:56,008 - The Ottomans? We're to war with the Ottomans? 359 00:18:56,032 --> 00:18:57,718 No, no, no, no. 360 00:18:57,742 --> 00:18:59,720 Don't, don't, don't trouble your pretty little hea... 361 00:18:59,744 --> 00:19:02,639 - Don't pat my fucking hands. I'm not a dog. 362 00:19:02,663 --> 00:19:05,851 Are we to war or not? You owe me something. 363 00:19:05,875 --> 00:19:07,978 You killed my fucking husband, prick. 364 00:19:08,002 --> 00:19:10,713 Whoa, whoa, what is this storm? 365 00:19:11,922 --> 00:19:15,051 We met the Ottoman ambassador today, prick. 366 00:19:15,718 --> 00:19:20,431 I think she has him in hand, but it hangs in the balance. 367 00:19:21,349 --> 00:19:22,534 Indeed. 368 00:19:30,024 --> 00:19:32,628 I will cook that thing in garlic butter one day. 369 00:19:32,652 --> 00:19:35,422 - Are we almost done? I have a great deal to do. 370 00:19:35,446 --> 00:19:38,008 My dear, you seem quite overwrought. 371 00:19:38,032 --> 00:19:40,427 Bloating and embarrassment are side effects of pregnancy. 372 00:19:40,451 --> 00:19:41,762 It's quite normal. 373 00:19:41,786 --> 00:19:43,221 I'm agitated. 374 00:19:43,245 --> 00:19:45,706 This dinner with the Ottoman, much rides on it. 375 00:19:46,499 --> 00:19:48,876 I know how I must behave, and yet... 376 00:19:49,627 --> 00:19:54,149 pregnancy has brought a surfeit of physical sensations. 377 00:19:54,173 --> 00:19:56,068 They overwhelm. 378 00:19:56,092 --> 00:19:58,236 This amount of agitation is quite serious. 379 00:19:58,260 --> 00:20:01,156 It can cause the baby to explode in the womb. 380 00:20:01,180 --> 00:20:02,950 You must have a release. 381 00:20:02,974 --> 00:20:05,494 Self-pleasure is allowed in pregnancy, 382 00:20:05,518 --> 00:20:08,413 but I would have to be standing by to watch. 383 00:20:08,437 --> 00:20:10,415 Is that essential? 384 00:20:10,439 --> 00:20:13,377 Probably not as essential as I'm making it sound. 385 00:20:13,401 --> 00:20:17,130 If you won't fuck Sunduk, you should just fuck someone else. 386 00:20:17,154 --> 00:20:19,216 I am happy to service the Empress. 387 00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:21,843 My knowledge of anatomy makes me a skilled lover. 388 00:20:21,867 --> 00:20:23,136 Intriguing. 389 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:26,640 Kind offer, Vinodel, but you may leave us. 390 00:20:26,664 --> 00:20:28,058 Okay. 391 00:20:28,082 --> 00:20:30,543 Call me when you feel the need for masturbation. 392 00:20:31,711 --> 00:20:33,462 I won't. Good day. 393 00:20:36,340 --> 00:20:40,553 It's time we got you properly fucked, for the health of the baby. 394 00:20:42,471 --> 00:20:43,991 I'm the Empress. 395 00:20:44,015 --> 00:20:46,559 It's not so simple to find someone. 396 00:20:47,226 --> 00:20:50,664 I fuck the doctor, he drunkenly tells his friends. 397 00:20:50,688 --> 00:20:53,417 Then I am Slutress, not Empress. 398 00:20:53,441 --> 00:20:55,294 A soldier, he wants a promotion. 399 00:20:55,318 --> 00:20:57,921 A noble, he wants land and tax relief. 400 00:20:57,945 --> 00:21:00,299 All true, but there is a solution. 401 00:21:00,323 --> 00:21:02,009 Nothing could be simpler. 402 00:21:02,033 --> 00:21:03,159 Guards. 403 00:21:03,909 --> 00:21:06,054 - Guards? - It's a tradition. 404 00:21:06,078 --> 00:21:08,765 They have been trained in discretion for centuries. 405 00:21:08,789 --> 00:21:10,934 Also, they have to do whatever you want, 406 00:21:10,958 --> 00:21:13,687 no matter how exotic or primordial. 407 00:21:13,711 --> 00:21:15,856 They won't bat an eye. 408 00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:18,942 I'm not looking for someone who isn't in a position to refuse me. 409 00:21:18,966 --> 00:21:20,193 Really? 410 00:21:20,217 --> 00:21:23,721 I find power imbalances wildly erotic. 411 00:21:24,430 --> 00:21:26,223 I suppose I'm old-fashioned that way. 412 00:21:32,897 --> 00:21:36,710 Svenska has news and has paid a heavy price to get it. 413 00:21:38,152 --> 00:21:42,090 Catherine and Velementov worry about the Ottomans starting something. 414 00:21:42,114 --> 00:21:44,009 The ambassador met with her today 415 00:21:44,033 --> 00:21:47,971 and she hopes to win him to her club of gibbering acolytes. 416 00:21:47,995 --> 00:21:49,473 It was unclear if she had. 417 00:21:49,497 --> 00:21:52,643 Perhaps, Sunduk needs to be led to an understanding 418 00:21:52,667 --> 00:21:55,044 of what he should report back about his visit here. 419 00:21:56,045 --> 00:21:58,607 The Sultan has some strange beliefs about women. 420 00:21:58,631 --> 00:22:01,234 You refer to the "some are witches with horns" belief. 421 00:22:01,258 --> 00:22:02,235 Exactly. 422 00:22:02,259 --> 00:22:05,697 His belief in witches who feast on men's nosebleeds, 423 00:22:05,721 --> 00:22:10,327 witches who keep chickens that turn into devils when urinated upon. 424 00:22:10,351 --> 00:22:12,996 You're making this too complicated and weird. 425 00:22:13,020 --> 00:22:14,957 Sunduk is a sweet guy who loves me. 426 00:22:14,981 --> 00:22:17,125 I remind him of that love, and we make sure he knows 427 00:22:17,149 --> 00:22:18,877 Catherine is not long for the throne. 428 00:22:18,901 --> 00:22:20,963 - He does love blondes, though. - Mm. 429 00:22:20,987 --> 00:22:24,258 And she is the most exquisite creature alive, how can anyone not love her? 430 00:22:24,282 --> 00:22:27,094 - I just don't see it, personally. - Good answer, darling. 431 00:22:27,118 --> 00:22:30,389 - All right. Let's act on Sunduk. But let me just say this to all. 432 00:22:30,413 --> 00:22:34,351 We unbalance her, but never hurt or endanger her, understood? 433 00:22:34,375 --> 00:22:36,979 Subtlety, we can do that, right? 434 00:22:37,003 --> 00:22:38,563 Subtlety is my middle name. 435 00:22:38,587 --> 00:22:40,506 I thought it was Levushka? 436 00:22:41,841 --> 00:22:43,402 What a morning. 437 00:22:43,426 --> 00:22:49,157 First, the Diderot breakfast, and then the Sunduk dessert. 438 00:22:49,181 --> 00:22:51,451 I think my speech at the end was good. 439 00:22:51,475 --> 00:22:52,744 It roused them, I feel. 440 00:22:52,768 --> 00:22:54,705 Hmm. 441 00:22:54,729 --> 00:22:56,456 Hmm? 442 00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:58,917 It was an inspiring call to arms. 443 00:22:58,941 --> 00:23:02,278 Well, I think they more heard your, "Shit, why can't you be French?" 444 00:23:03,321 --> 00:23:04,631 No. No, it was... 445 00:23:04,655 --> 00:23:07,843 Sorry, my overly dark interpretation. 446 00:23:07,867 --> 00:23:11,471 On another topic: That Basil guy, what a cunt. 447 00:23:11,495 --> 00:23:14,308 You should probably send him home or just kill him if it's easier. 448 00:23:14,332 --> 00:23:16,268 Oh? What makes you say that, I wonder? 449 00:23:16,292 --> 00:23:19,688 Did you know that he can write with both hands? 450 00:23:19,712 --> 00:23:21,815 Raskolvy says it is an omen, 451 00:23:21,839 --> 00:23:26,403 and he has extra skin on his elbows, which portends doom for crops, 452 00:23:26,427 --> 00:23:28,905 and also is quite disconcerting to look at. 453 00:23:28,929 --> 00:23:31,450 I sense you aim to protect Archie. 454 00:23:31,474 --> 00:23:36,496 He is a kinder and much saner option for the leader of the church. 455 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:40,542 - I suggest you keep your fingers out of the machinery of this issue lest you lose them. 456 00:23:40,566 --> 00:23:42,026 Right. 457 00:24:01,003 --> 00:24:03,255 Room's clear. You can go in. 458 00:24:04,340 --> 00:24:08,135 Ah. Uh, what color do you think? Hmm? 459 00:24:09,637 --> 00:24:11,198 Not sure. 460 00:24:11,222 --> 00:24:12,866 I say each wall different. 461 00:24:12,890 --> 00:24:14,576 You know, green for the love of nature. 462 00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,579 That one will be yellow for the sunshine of a new day, 463 00:24:17,603 --> 00:24:20,540 then this one dark red as blood for his future. 464 00:24:20,564 --> 00:24:22,960 Then one, whatever the color of crispy pork is, 465 00:24:22,984 --> 00:24:26,237 or one wall this color. 466 00:24:27,446 --> 00:24:30,384 Ouch. Sorry again. 467 00:24:30,408 --> 00:24:31,760 Not at all. 468 00:24:31,784 --> 00:24:35,222 It's excruciating, but I'm thinking of things to distract me from the pain. 469 00:24:35,246 --> 00:24:37,349 Paul, mostly. Hello, Paul. 470 00:24:37,373 --> 00:24:38,392 Sweet. 471 00:24:38,416 --> 00:24:41,687 And on that, I think we should have a baby shower. 472 00:24:41,711 --> 00:24:43,772 What? No. 473 00:24:43,796 --> 00:24:46,066 - Russians love them. The court will be happy. 474 00:24:46,090 --> 00:24:48,443 People want to shower us with gifts. 475 00:24:48,467 --> 00:24:50,404 Hence, baby shower. 476 00:24:50,428 --> 00:24:52,722 - No. - Of course. 477 00:24:54,181 --> 00:24:55,492 Ah. 478 00:24:55,516 --> 00:24:57,351 Ah, they really went for the kidneys. 479 00:24:58,769 --> 00:25:01,540 Fine. We'll have a baby shower. 480 00:25:01,564 --> 00:25:04,251 Ah. I'll plan it, as you are terrible at throwing parties. 481 00:25:04,275 --> 00:25:06,753 Great. And I will be busy running the country, 482 00:25:06,777 --> 00:25:08,779 as you were terrible doing that. 483 00:25:09,530 --> 00:25:10,882 This pamphlet of yours. 484 00:25:10,906 --> 00:25:13,260 - Oh, good, you read it. - I did not. 485 00:25:13,284 --> 00:25:15,554 Grigor hijacked my breakfast with it. 486 00:25:15,578 --> 00:25:17,556 Huh. I will talk to him. 487 00:25:17,580 --> 00:25:20,601 He likes to be loved, and no doubt imagined my musings 488 00:25:20,625 --> 00:25:23,520 would entertain and reflect well on him. 489 00:25:23,544 --> 00:25:26,297 He has lost George, so be sympathetic to him. 490 00:25:27,465 --> 00:25:29,401 What was its purpose? 491 00:25:29,425 --> 00:25:32,738 I was bored, and then I thought for Paul, you know, my memoirs, 492 00:25:32,762 --> 00:25:34,823 but told like a bedtime story, 493 00:25:34,847 --> 00:25:37,284 and then I thought maybe the court would be interested. 494 00:25:37,308 --> 00:25:38,785 You miss their attention. 495 00:25:38,809 --> 00:25:40,811 Terrified as it was. 496 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:44,791 I could have all your pamphlets seized and burned. 497 00:25:44,815 --> 00:25:47,902 You believe in freedom of the printing press, how would it look? 498 00:25:49,111 --> 00:25:50,279 Although, I see an... 499 00:25:51,197 --> 00:25:53,592 What's it called? That thing where I did something to you, 500 00:25:53,616 --> 00:25:56,261 you were morally outraged, then you did it back to me? 501 00:25:56,285 --> 00:25:58,221 - Irony. - Ah. 502 00:25:58,245 --> 00:26:01,224 Or ironie in French. 503 00:26:01,248 --> 00:26:02,601 That was good. 504 00:26:02,625 --> 00:26:04,269 Oh. Merci beaucoup. 505 00:26:04,293 --> 00:26:05,628 Lessons. 506 00:26:07,713 --> 00:26:11,008 Ah. I made this for Paul using parts from real bears. 507 00:26:19,058 --> 00:26:22,246 - You okay? - Fine, thanks for asking. 508 00:26:22,270 --> 00:26:25,832 - You seem a bit unsure. - No, no, it's great, I just, uh... 509 00:26:25,856 --> 00:26:28,252 been a while with anyone. 510 00:26:28,276 --> 00:26:31,255 No one could ever understand why you never fucked around on George. 511 00:26:31,279 --> 00:26:33,322 Well, I... You know, I am... 512 00:26:35,324 --> 00:26:37,177 Your cock's not actually in me. 513 00:26:37,201 --> 00:26:38,470 Yeah, no offense. 514 00:26:38,494 --> 00:26:41,622 I just... finding it a bit weird, to be honest. 515 00:26:42,290 --> 00:26:44,810 Ah! Sunduk, my old friend. 516 00:26:44,834 --> 00:26:47,104 Wonderful to see you again. 517 00:26:47,128 --> 00:26:49,171 - And you! - What the fuck? 518 00:26:51,007 --> 00:26:54,111 - Well, I'm pretty well. I'm going to be a dad. 519 00:26:54,135 --> 00:26:55,320 Congratulations. 520 00:26:55,344 --> 00:26:57,263 I was... Oh. 521 00:27:03,185 --> 00:27:05,205 Very nice, thank you. 522 00:27:05,229 --> 00:27:06,480 You're welcome. 523 00:27:07,648 --> 00:27:10,210 - So what happened to you? The coup? 524 00:27:10,234 --> 00:27:13,005 - I was basically winning. At any point I could have won. 525 00:27:13,029 --> 00:27:14,464 And then I got really hungry. 526 00:27:14,488 --> 00:27:18,552 You know when you're really hungry, and it's just like, "I just need to eat, 527 00:27:18,576 --> 00:27:20,220 and I don't care what it takes"? 528 00:27:20,244 --> 00:27:23,974 So I temporarily abdicated, but I am coming back to power. 529 00:27:23,998 --> 00:27:28,687 As is my destiny and the will of God, which I know you people take seriously. 530 00:27:28,711 --> 00:27:32,149 Yes, we've, uh, always seen you as God's will, 531 00:27:32,173 --> 00:27:34,985 but now we're a little confused by God's actions. 532 00:27:35,009 --> 00:27:37,446 Well, obviously it's his will I regain the throne, 533 00:27:37,470 --> 00:27:39,197 otherwise why would I still be alive? 534 00:27:39,221 --> 00:27:40,741 I don't know. 535 00:27:40,765 --> 00:27:42,701 I meant to ask Catherine why she did that, 536 00:27:42,725 --> 00:27:46,145 but I was too distracted by thoughts of frottage with her hair. 537 00:27:47,521 --> 00:27:49,917 It's like a yard of corn silk. 538 00:27:49,941 --> 00:27:53,277 There to wrap around your c... You're dead. 539 00:27:54,403 --> 00:27:55,488 Sorry, what? 540 00:27:57,239 --> 00:27:59,885 I'm trying to save your life here. 541 00:27:59,909 --> 00:28:01,386 If you go back to the Sultan 542 00:28:01,410 --> 00:28:04,640 and inform him Catherine is the true heir to the throne, ignoring God, 543 00:28:04,664 --> 00:28:07,142 and how I'm the blood descendant of rulers for centuries... 544 00:28:07,166 --> 00:28:10,270 "Don't worry about it, Sultan, she is the one to talk to"... 545 00:28:10,294 --> 00:28:14,048 How will he react when I retake it in a matter of months if not weeks? 546 00:28:14,632 --> 00:28:15,817 He cuts your throat. 547 00:28:15,841 --> 00:28:17,402 You're so certain of this? 548 00:28:17,426 --> 00:28:19,404 Mm. This is just God's little challenge for me, 549 00:28:19,428 --> 00:28:21,531 so I come back and be a slightly better leader. 550 00:28:21,555 --> 00:28:23,951 She may have the court now, in theory, but they love me. 551 00:28:23,975 --> 00:28:25,393 My popularity grows. 552 00:28:26,852 --> 00:28:29,206 Uh, Grigor. You look miserable, by the way. 553 00:28:29,230 --> 00:28:31,833 I'm fine. Uh... 554 00:28:31,857 --> 00:28:34,110 I might stop, actually. Yeah. 555 00:28:38,114 --> 00:28:39,532 Uncle Varnya. 556 00:28:41,492 --> 00:28:43,387 I thought you'd left. 557 00:28:43,411 --> 00:28:46,265 I did. I told them the great news of the road to be built 558 00:28:46,289 --> 00:28:47,790 and there was much rejoicing. 559 00:28:49,083 --> 00:28:50,560 I'm glad to help my region. 560 00:28:50,584 --> 00:28:54,147 Orlo! Orlo! Orlo! 561 00:28:54,171 --> 00:28:56,066 Stop it, you're embarrassing me. 562 00:28:56,090 --> 00:28:58,819 The Ottomans are running rampant near us. 563 00:28:58,843 --> 00:29:00,487 We are dealing with it. 564 00:29:00,511 --> 00:29:03,240 - Oh, of course, you are. People are writing your story, you know? 565 00:29:03,264 --> 00:29:05,575 - Really? Mm. It's not really a literate village. 566 00:29:05,599 --> 00:29:09,246 Born in shit, floated to the stars. 567 00:29:09,270 --> 00:29:10,438 Thanks. 568 00:29:12,398 --> 00:29:14,066 We are a poor people. 569 00:29:15,192 --> 00:29:16,503 The poorest. 570 00:29:16,527 --> 00:29:18,130 I know. 571 00:29:18,154 --> 00:29:19,447 Cash is good. 572 00:29:20,489 --> 00:29:22,116 - Cash? - Mm, cash. 573 00:29:22,908 --> 00:29:25,137 It lifts the spirits of our people. 574 00:29:25,161 --> 00:29:27,913 It lifts bread to their scabbed mouths. 575 00:29:29,373 --> 00:29:31,310 I don't know that I can do that. 576 00:29:31,334 --> 00:29:33,794 Ah, but I know you can. You will. 577 00:29:35,463 --> 00:29:37,190 For your heart is good. 578 00:29:37,214 --> 00:29:42,261 You love your people and are not black of heart or evil of eye. 579 00:29:43,763 --> 00:29:44,972 Are you? 580 00:29:45,973 --> 00:29:49,852 No, I'm not black of heart or evil of eye. 581 00:29:53,272 --> 00:29:54,649 Cash. 582 00:30:08,162 --> 00:30:10,206 Apparently, there's a party. 583 00:30:34,438 --> 00:30:35,749 You see they love me, 584 00:30:35,773 --> 00:30:38,859 and her power is an illusion that I will shatter when the time is right. 585 00:30:48,077 --> 00:30:49,829 How is he allowed a party? 586 00:30:50,997 --> 00:30:52,832 I think he found a loophole... 587 00:30:53,791 --> 00:30:55,251 and a hat. 588 00:30:56,585 --> 00:30:59,398 Ah, welcome! It's our baby shower. 589 00:30:59,422 --> 00:31:01,108 Hmm. Such speedy organizing. 590 00:31:01,132 --> 00:31:03,485 - Mm. - Gosh, don't you look baffling. 591 00:31:03,509 --> 00:31:05,028 Oh, thanks. 592 00:31:05,052 --> 00:31:07,781 - Beautiful baby shower, Empress. Congratulations. 593 00:31:07,805 --> 00:31:10,701 I was explaining to Catherine earlier that when you have a party, 594 00:31:10,725 --> 00:31:14,413 it should be an impromptu, spontaneous outpouring of love and alcohol. 595 00:31:14,437 --> 00:31:17,249 But I suppose that's hard to understand for an un-fun person, 596 00:31:17,273 --> 00:31:20,002 someone who forces people to do homework at a breakfast. 597 00:31:20,026 --> 00:31:21,753 That was fun. 598 00:31:21,777 --> 00:31:24,298 We had a Diderot breakfast. People loved it. 599 00:31:24,322 --> 00:31:25,966 I'm sure they did. 600 00:31:25,990 --> 00:31:27,843 I'm bored rehashing it, even for a second. Really. 601 00:31:27,867 --> 00:31:29,511 I must dash. I have to tell people 602 00:31:29,535 --> 00:31:32,913 the stuff coming out of the fountain is cherry-flavored vodka and not blood. 603 00:31:34,290 --> 00:31:37,269 - I thought we said 7:00 in my apartments? - We did. 604 00:31:37,293 --> 00:31:40,772 But in the end, I decided it might be a pointless gesture. 605 00:31:40,796 --> 00:31:42,399 I am sorry, but I was under the impression 606 00:31:42,423 --> 00:31:44,401 we made some headway this morning. 607 00:31:44,425 --> 00:31:48,572 Mm. It seems your people may not be adjusting to your reign 608 00:31:48,596 --> 00:31:50,407 as seamlessly as you've made out. 609 00:31:50,431 --> 00:31:51,908 Nonsense. They love me. 610 00:31:51,932 --> 00:31:55,037 And yet here we are, at your husband's party, 611 00:31:55,061 --> 00:31:59,333 where they sip on his vodka and cram in like sardines. 612 00:31:59,357 --> 00:32:01,501 You do not make a strong case. 613 00:32:01,525 --> 00:32:03,086 - That is not... - Everyone! 614 00:32:03,110 --> 00:32:04,421 Everyone! 615 00:32:04,445 --> 00:32:06,381 I would like to make a toast! 616 00:32:09,867 --> 00:32:12,304 Yes! As would I! 617 00:32:12,328 --> 00:32:13,430 Indeed! 618 00:32:13,454 --> 00:32:16,558 The Empress probably has some more reading to assign. 619 00:32:16,582 --> 00:32:18,018 That's not true! 620 00:32:18,042 --> 00:32:20,187 I wanted to thank you all for coming to my party. 621 00:32:21,629 --> 00:32:22,814 This party is very clearly mine. 622 00:32:22,838 --> 00:32:24,608 I provided you all with duck rillette... 623 00:32:24,632 --> 00:32:27,903 Which I own and have paid our chefs to produce. 624 00:32:27,927 --> 00:32:29,821 In God's eyes, I am still the chosen. 625 00:32:29,845 --> 00:32:33,283 God cares for his people, so chose again. 626 00:32:33,307 --> 00:32:34,868 Let's get fucked up! 627 00:32:37,687 --> 00:32:41,375 Here's to many more parties like this, because I am your Empress, 628 00:32:41,399 --> 00:32:44,044 whom you love and think is very fun. 629 00:32:44,068 --> 00:32:47,214 - Uh, but not as fun as me. Because I am known for being fun. 630 00:32:47,238 --> 00:32:50,342 Indeed, you are not known for much else. 631 00:32:50,366 --> 00:32:53,762 - Huzzah! - Huzzah! 632 00:32:53,786 --> 00:32:55,746 Ah. Beat you to it. 633 00:33:02,503 --> 00:33:04,815 - I took your advice. - Hmm. And? 634 00:33:04,839 --> 00:33:07,276 I groveled. It was unseemly. 635 00:33:07,300 --> 00:33:11,780 SA year of betrayal on both sides cannot be healed in one conversation. 636 00:33:11,804 --> 00:33:12,864 Hmm. 637 00:33:12,888 --> 00:33:16,076 And the two of you got off to the worst possible start, we must not forget that. 638 00:33:16,100 --> 00:33:18,870 - How so? - Think back. 639 00:33:18,894 --> 00:33:22,958 Try and see if you can put your finger on it... or in it. 640 00:33:22,982 --> 00:33:24,275 Ah. 641 00:33:25,359 --> 00:33:26,920 It was my duty. 642 00:33:26,944 --> 00:33:29,590 Inelegant and uncomfortable, but my duty. 643 00:33:29,614 --> 00:33:32,759 That's not quite the beginning of an apology, is it? 644 00:33:39,165 --> 00:33:40,517 Aaaah! 645 00:33:57,558 --> 00:34:01,163 - Ooh! - Oh! Out of bounds, Tatyana. 646 00:34:01,187 --> 00:34:03,123 He's on Cum Patrol! 647 00:34:03,147 --> 00:34:05,333 Wait, the game is to throw turnips at serfs? 648 00:34:05,357 --> 00:34:07,543 Sweet Catherine, would you like us to put the turnips down 649 00:34:07,567 --> 00:34:09,212 in case we hurt their feelings, too? 650 00:34:09,236 --> 00:34:12,090 I was actually about to suggest something more fun. 651 00:34:12,114 --> 00:34:14,592 Turnip someone who has wronged you in some way. 652 00:34:14,616 --> 00:34:16,344 Oh! 653 00:34:16,368 --> 00:34:18,096 - That is more fun. - Smolny! 654 00:34:20,790 --> 00:34:22,559 Huzzah for the Empress! 655 00:34:22,583 --> 00:34:25,395 Indeed! Huzzah for me! 656 00:34:25,419 --> 00:34:27,837 Huzzah! 657 00:34:28,506 --> 00:34:29,942 Hello. 658 00:34:29,966 --> 00:34:32,277 I-I hear good things about the girls' school. 659 00:34:32,301 --> 00:34:33,278 Really? 660 00:34:33,302 --> 00:34:36,305 I mean, I think so, but you can never be sure. 661 00:34:37,181 --> 00:34:39,117 Our minds create a picture of the world 662 00:34:39,141 --> 00:34:42,079 based on what we perceive through our senses. 663 00:34:42,103 --> 00:34:45,331 - "Knowledge is a construction." Immanuel Kant. 664 00:34:45,355 --> 00:34:48,210 - You know Kant? I can't do Kant. 665 00:34:48,234 --> 00:34:49,586 You can. 666 00:34:49,610 --> 00:34:52,214 I think, therefore I Kant. 667 00:34:52,238 --> 00:34:53,840 - Descartes. - Mm. 668 00:34:53,864 --> 00:34:55,074 But not quite. 669 00:34:56,659 --> 00:34:57,785 Decant? 670 00:34:58,577 --> 00:34:59,638 That was giddying. 671 00:34:59,662 --> 00:35:01,497 Shall we do more? 672 00:35:04,166 --> 00:35:06,186 I believe those are for the baby. 673 00:35:06,210 --> 00:35:07,336 He'll never know. 674 00:35:08,462 --> 00:35:10,089 Would you like some, Marial? 675 00:35:13,384 --> 00:35:15,112 So, you do remember my name. 676 00:35:15,136 --> 00:35:16,470 Of course. 677 00:35:17,388 --> 00:35:20,033 And yet, when was the last time we spoke to one another? 678 00:35:20,057 --> 00:35:23,287 You and George had that disagreement. 679 00:35:23,311 --> 00:35:25,038 I was forced to be a serf, 680 00:35:25,062 --> 00:35:28,792 and she chose to forget our friendship and instead taunted and humiliated me. 681 00:35:28,816 --> 00:35:30,043 You mean that disagreement? 682 00:35:30,067 --> 00:35:32,337 She did not shy away from humiliating others. 683 00:35:32,361 --> 00:35:34,530 At times, her worst quality. 684 00:35:34,864 --> 00:35:36,133 At times, her best. 685 00:35:36,157 --> 00:35:38,909 Even when she and I were friends, you and I barely spoke. 686 00:35:39,493 --> 00:35:41,638 She preferred if we did not. 687 00:35:41,662 --> 00:35:43,039 Why? 688 00:35:43,831 --> 00:35:47,001 - I lost my virginity to you. - You can't tell me she was jealous. 689 00:35:47,585 --> 00:35:50,254 She fucked your best friend for the entirety of your marriage. 690 00:35:50,838 --> 00:35:52,858 It was not a marriage bound by logic. 691 00:35:52,882 --> 00:35:54,634 I have to go. 692 00:35:55,885 --> 00:35:57,553 Can I come with you? 693 00:36:00,806 --> 00:36:01,891 Yes. 694 00:36:09,065 --> 00:36:11,376 Macaroons on Paul! 695 00:36:15,655 --> 00:36:17,907 Hi. 696 00:36:29,251 --> 00:36:31,754 That is not how we're doing this. 697 00:36:33,005 --> 00:36:34,900 Sorry for slapping you. 698 00:36:34,924 --> 00:36:36,652 That's fine. 699 00:36:36,676 --> 00:36:38,094 Um... 700 00:36:40,721 --> 00:36:43,659 Oh! You have lice in your beard. 701 00:36:43,683 --> 00:36:45,661 I-I know. 702 00:36:45,685 --> 00:36:48,771 Beard lice has been going around the guards. 703 00:36:50,731 --> 00:36:51,917 Right, then. 704 00:36:51,941 --> 00:36:54,068 This is done. You may go. 705 00:36:54,819 --> 00:36:56,362 Look at him. 706 00:36:56,946 --> 00:36:59,883 The fucking arrogance of that moustache. 707 00:36:59,907 --> 00:37:02,094 Thrilling, isn't it? 708 00:37:02,118 --> 00:37:05,097 It's fucking dangerous, the way this is being handled. 709 00:37:05,121 --> 00:37:08,725 Peace chats and anchovy platters. 710 00:37:08,749 --> 00:37:11,836 I know their way, as do you. 711 00:37:12,503 --> 00:37:14,564 We need to show strength. 712 00:37:14,588 --> 00:37:16,316 That's all they understand. 713 00:37:16,340 --> 00:37:18,944 Maybe that's all anyone's tried. 714 00:37:18,968 --> 00:37:21,446 Maybe a new way, a new result. 715 00:37:21,470 --> 00:37:22,823 I can win this war. 716 00:37:22,847 --> 00:37:26,493 But not if I am dealt a losing hand at the off. 717 00:37:26,517 --> 00:37:29,312 She must do something... 718 00:37:30,354 --> 00:37:32,749 or at the end of the night, Sunduk goes home knowing 719 00:37:32,773 --> 00:37:35,669 she is a pacifist with a popular husband. 720 00:37:35,693 --> 00:37:39,756 They'll take our territory and slaughter our people, 721 00:37:39,780 --> 00:37:43,159 and he'll expect a nice anchovy platter in the mail for it. 722 00:37:44,118 --> 00:37:49,582 You know, I was on that trip with Peter the Great to Constantinople. 723 00:37:50,499 --> 00:37:52,293 I don't remember you being bitten. 724 00:37:53,377 --> 00:37:54,980 Really? 725 00:37:55,004 --> 00:37:56,881 How strange. 726 00:37:58,257 --> 00:38:00,009 You are often drunk, though. 727 00:38:05,890 --> 00:38:07,409 Hello. 728 00:38:07,433 --> 00:38:09,912 I noticed you left with a guard? 729 00:38:09,936 --> 00:38:11,997 We may need a roster system. 730 00:38:12,021 --> 00:38:13,582 No. Beard lice. 731 00:38:13,606 --> 00:38:14,941 Oh. 732 00:38:15,858 --> 00:38:19,171 I fear I may have cheapened myself tonight for no reason. 733 00:38:19,195 --> 00:38:21,048 The court love you. 734 00:38:21,072 --> 00:38:22,490 Sunduk does not. 735 00:38:23,282 --> 00:38:26,511 The joy of being a woman is knowing that we have 736 00:38:26,535 --> 00:38:30,807 unseen and unacknowledged depths and strengths 737 00:38:30,831 --> 00:38:33,435 beyond anything a man will ever know, 738 00:38:33,459 --> 00:38:38,023 and knowing that, when we feel like it, 739 00:38:38,047 --> 00:38:41,467 we can outplay a man on his own field. 740 00:38:42,218 --> 00:38:43,511 Indeed. 741 00:38:52,353 --> 00:38:56,416 Oh! We were just chatting about our hunting trip to Myshkin last year. 742 00:38:56,440 --> 00:38:57,900 Interesting. 743 00:38:58,609 --> 00:39:00,128 We should hunt sometime. 744 00:39:00,152 --> 00:39:02,863 - You hunting? - Indeed. 745 00:39:03,698 --> 00:39:06,051 Unfortunately, it's time for you to go now. 746 00:39:06,075 --> 00:39:09,221 Guards. Escort the Emperor to a spare room. 747 00:39:09,245 --> 00:39:13,600 Tonight was fun, and I like to humor him from time to time, but I have had enough. 748 00:39:13,624 --> 00:39:16,228 Why have you started talking about me like I'm not here? 749 00:39:16,252 --> 00:39:17,437 Oh! What the fuck? 750 00:39:17,461 --> 00:39:19,022 Hey, let me go! 751 00:39:19,046 --> 00:39:20,482 Stop! Hey! 752 00:39:20,506 --> 00:39:21,506 Hey! 753 00:39:23,009 --> 00:39:25,219 Now... hunting. 754 00:39:25,803 --> 00:39:27,572 Tomorrow, shall we? 755 00:39:27,596 --> 00:39:29,533 Yes, I think we shall. 756 00:39:29,557 --> 00:39:30,683 Mm. 757 00:39:33,269 --> 00:39:36,397 I feel like I am finally free to do as I please. 758 00:39:37,023 --> 00:39:40,443 I was in a foursome today. Haven't done that in years. 759 00:39:41,777 --> 00:39:43,088 Look at you. 760 00:39:43,112 --> 00:39:45,173 Every day has just been filled 761 00:39:45,197 --> 00:39:47,926 with all the things I haven't gotten to do for years. 762 00:39:47,950 --> 00:39:49,952 So, you don't miss her at all? 763 00:39:50,536 --> 00:39:52,306 What a terrible question. 764 00:39:52,330 --> 00:39:54,182 I'm sorry. I'm su... 765 00:39:54,206 --> 00:39:55,833 I'm sure you do. 766 00:39:56,667 --> 00:39:58,169 I don't know. 767 00:39:59,378 --> 00:40:02,232 I haven't felt much of anything. I don't want to feel anything. 768 00:40:02,256 --> 00:40:03,942 I don't think we should fuck. 769 00:40:03,966 --> 00:40:06,111 - There'd be a nice symmetry to it. - Mm. 770 00:40:06,135 --> 00:40:07,487 We were each other's first. 771 00:40:07,511 --> 00:40:09,740 Mm, there'd only be symmetry if we were each other's last. 772 00:40:09,764 --> 00:40:13,785 - We could fuck every ten years. So tonight, and then again in a decade. 773 00:40:13,809 --> 00:40:17,521 Mm. I think I need the person I'm fucking to feel something. 774 00:40:18,147 --> 00:40:20,042 Numbness is not very attractive. 775 00:40:23,235 --> 00:40:24,737 Understandable. 776 00:40:26,572 --> 00:40:27,740 Mm. 777 00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:38,101 A case for numbness. 778 00:40:38,125 --> 00:40:40,145 Suppose I let myself feel something. 779 00:40:40,169 --> 00:40:44,650 And what I feel is that I miss her so much 780 00:40:44,674 --> 00:40:48,886 that I am pinned down underneath the boulder of that pain, 781 00:40:49,470 --> 00:40:52,157 completely flattened and powerless to rise again. 782 00:40:52,181 --> 00:40:54,100 What good would that do me? 783 00:40:54,767 --> 00:40:57,603 Or suppose that I realize that I don't miss her. 784 00:40:58,896 --> 00:41:02,834 That would be excruciating as well. Half my life spent on a lie. 785 00:41:02,858 --> 00:41:06,862 So, it's either numb, or terrible. 786 00:41:14,578 --> 00:41:16,330 Did that feel terrible? 787 00:41:16,872 --> 00:41:18,332 It did not. 788 00:41:28,050 --> 00:41:29,778 Still not terrible. 789 00:41:29,802 --> 00:41:31,595 - But not numb? - No. 790 00:41:42,023 --> 00:41:43,107 Hmm. 791 00:41:51,741 --> 00:41:53,802 Thank you for joining me. 792 00:41:53,826 --> 00:41:56,263 I believe the more one knows a person, 793 00:41:56,287 --> 00:41:59,308 the more one realizes the common interests between them. 794 00:41:59,332 --> 00:42:01,101 It applies to countries, as well. 795 00:42:01,125 --> 00:42:05,355 And I believe there's no better cure for a hangover than killing things. 796 00:42:05,379 --> 00:42:07,548 It applies to countries, as well. 797 00:42:11,969 --> 00:42:15,514 I love the way they fall, it's very poetic. 798 00:42:16,057 --> 00:42:17,451 Have you read Rumi? 799 00:42:17,475 --> 00:42:18,643 No. 800 00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:23,123 Which I'm sure you knew, which is why you asked. 801 00:42:25,274 --> 00:42:26,793 Well done. 802 00:42:26,817 --> 00:42:28,712 Ah. You seem surprised. 803 00:42:28,736 --> 00:42:29,862 As do you. 804 00:42:30,613 --> 00:42:31,864 Not at all. 805 00:42:42,583 --> 00:42:46,712 I worry you will underestimate me and then look bad to your Sultan. 806 00:42:48,172 --> 00:42:52,027 You need to know, I will act decisively for my country. 807 00:42:56,847 --> 00:42:59,642 I take it Velementov is in the forest. 808 00:43:00,434 --> 00:43:03,104 Oh. What is a leader without a strategy? 809 00:43:03,771 --> 00:43:05,815 Well shot, Velementov! 810 00:43:08,526 --> 00:43:10,671 You aim to impress me. 811 00:43:10,695 --> 00:43:12,280 I did. 812 00:43:13,281 --> 00:43:16,843 And it was working, so ponder that. 813 00:43:16,867 --> 00:43:20,389 How simple a thing was that colored your opinion of me, 814 00:43:20,413 --> 00:43:23,249 mister sophisticated worldly ambassador. 815 00:43:23,582 --> 00:43:25,310 A valid point. 816 00:43:25,334 --> 00:43:27,253 You think I will not last. 817 00:43:28,504 --> 00:43:31,757 But that is because you have never seen a ruler like me before. 818 00:43:32,425 --> 00:43:34,361 Because I am the future. 819 00:43:34,385 --> 00:43:35,779 Maybe you are. 820 00:43:35,803 --> 00:43:37,471 Hmm. 821 00:43:37,722 --> 00:43:39,992 Maybe you're a delusional child. 822 00:43:40,016 --> 00:43:42,351 But are you happy to take the risk I'm not? 823 00:43:42,893 --> 00:43:44,538 May I make a suggestion? 824 00:43:44,562 --> 00:43:48,208 It might help matters of diplomacy to not start things off by lying 825 00:43:48,232 --> 00:43:52,462 about having an all-female cabinet of high-ranking advisors 826 00:43:52,486 --> 00:43:54,905 simply because you think it will enrage me. 827 00:43:55,781 --> 00:43:58,093 For what it's worth, it did not enrage me. 828 00:43:58,117 --> 00:43:59,452 Interesting. 829 00:44:00,411 --> 00:44:03,015 - May I make a suggestion? - Of course. 830 00:44:03,039 --> 00:44:04,766 Keep the moustache. 831 00:44:04,790 --> 00:44:07,769 You might be tempted at a later date to shave it. 832 00:44:07,793 --> 00:44:11,064 You'll think, "Ah, it'll grow back. There's no risk," 833 00:44:11,088 --> 00:44:16,719 but it will never grow back the same, and it is marvelous. 834 00:44:18,846 --> 00:44:21,557 And if the point is to get all the birds... 835 00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:29,815 ...not everything need be seized by force and aggression. 836 00:44:34,654 --> 00:44:39,343 They seemed friendly and walked back arm-in-arm. 837 00:44:39,367 --> 00:44:41,369 Right. Mm. 838 00:44:43,037 --> 00:44:44,789 So, she hates random killing, 839 00:44:45,706 --> 00:44:49,311 but is it random if I think about it very methodically ahead of time, 840 00:44:49,335 --> 00:44:51,104 and it's actually a political strategy? 841 00:44:51,128 --> 00:44:54,983 As I need trouble on our border, and I need Sunduk to not try and fuck her, 842 00:44:55,007 --> 00:44:57,778 'cause I know that guy and he has a way. 843 00:44:57,802 --> 00:44:59,971 Hypnosis is part of it, he told me. 844 00:45:00,930 --> 00:45:02,556 Hmm. 845 00:45:03,349 --> 00:45:04,409 Okay. Yeah. 846 00:45:04,433 --> 00:45:06,227 Arkady, I need you to do something for me. 847 00:45:07,561 --> 00:45:10,123 - Of course. - You seem hesitant. 848 00:45:10,147 --> 00:45:11,691 No, no. I, uh... 849 00:45:12,316 --> 00:45:15,987 I promised Tatyana a night out, but I can do this. 850 00:45:16,779 --> 00:45:18,030 Well, take her with you. 851 00:45:20,449 --> 00:45:23,720 I owe you an apology, Empress. 852 00:45:23,744 --> 00:45:24,846 You owe me many. 853 00:45:24,870 --> 00:45:28,934 When I recall our first meeting, I wish it had gone differently. 854 00:45:28,958 --> 00:45:30,519 Indeed. 855 00:45:30,543 --> 00:45:33,480 When I recall it, I am first struck by a cold sensation, 856 00:45:33,504 --> 00:45:35,440 and then the urge to stab you 12 times. 857 00:45:35,464 --> 00:45:37,401 I understand completely. 858 00:45:37,425 --> 00:45:42,263 And in the spirit of a fresh start, I have this gift for you. 859 00:45:48,352 --> 00:45:50,998 Jesus Christ! 860 00:45:51,022 --> 00:45:54,209 - The offending finger. - I can see that. 861 00:45:54,233 --> 00:45:55,711 The gesture, 862 00:45:55,735 --> 00:46:00,882 grand and aggressive as it might be, is pointless. 863 00:46:00,906 --> 00:46:03,760 We have completely different visions for Russia. 864 00:46:03,784 --> 00:46:05,929 And yet we both want to save it. 865 00:46:05,953 --> 00:46:08,849 I still believe we can, together. 866 00:46:08,873 --> 00:46:12,561 It would take immense effort, when I simply do not have to. 867 00:46:12,585 --> 00:46:14,980 I have found someone on the same page as me. 868 00:46:15,004 --> 00:46:17,774 Someone who does not understand the church. 869 00:46:17,798 --> 00:46:19,443 He is a backwoods priest. 870 00:46:19,467 --> 00:46:21,445 He's a good man, but simple. 871 00:46:21,469 --> 00:46:23,262 He understands well enough. 872 00:46:24,180 --> 00:46:25,741 What is that supposed to mean? 873 00:46:25,765 --> 00:46:27,558 You have read Diderot. 874 00:46:28,142 --> 00:46:30,537 Whether God exists or does not, 875 00:46:30,561 --> 00:46:35,167 he has come to rank among the most sublime and useless truths. 876 00:46:35,191 --> 00:46:37,586 You say dangerous things, Empress. 877 00:46:37,610 --> 00:46:40,297 The church means something to these people. 878 00:46:40,321 --> 00:46:41,965 You cannot dismiss it. 879 00:46:41,989 --> 00:46:44,367 Not quickly, you're right. 880 00:46:45,368 --> 00:46:48,287 But in time, we might be introduced to a better way. 881 00:46:49,205 --> 00:46:51,850 - You used two. - I'm sorry? 882 00:46:51,874 --> 00:46:55,002 Fingers. You used two. 883 00:46:55,628 --> 00:46:57,088 Oh, yes. 884 00:46:57,922 --> 00:47:00,675 I was a little light-headed after the first. 885 00:47:02,885 --> 00:47:05,596 Although, at this point, I'm glad I stopped at one. 886 00:47:06,305 --> 00:47:07,723 Indeed. 887 00:47:08,140 --> 00:47:09,392 Me too. 888 00:47:12,228 --> 00:47:15,582 Ah! I had a thought. 889 00:47:15,606 --> 00:47:17,793 Who won't expect anything from you, 890 00:47:17,817 --> 00:47:22,422 won't use it against you in the court, and is guaranteed to get you off your nut? 891 00:47:22,446 --> 00:47:27,285 I mean, there's almost no one who fills that criteria, except... 892 00:47:29,787 --> 00:47:31,956 He knows the trick. 893 00:47:33,582 --> 00:47:35,167 Throw this away for me. 894 00:48:09,035 --> 00:48:11,930 Right, so what do we do now? 895 00:48:11,954 --> 00:48:14,141 Do we really have to cut his head off? 896 00:48:14,165 --> 00:48:15,666 Apparently. 897 00:48:18,794 --> 00:48:20,087 Get out. 898 00:48:20,463 --> 00:48:22,774 Ah! I didn't expect to see you today. 899 00:48:22,798 --> 00:48:25,217 Don't talk. 900 00:48:27,345 --> 00:48:28,888 Do the thing with the tongue. 901 00:48:29,597 --> 00:48:30,574 Hmm.