1 00:00:01,710 --> 00:00:03,336 Okay, now let's turn the page. 2 00:00:03,337 --> 00:00:07,256 Now this is a high-quality product. Look at that workmanship. 3 00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:09,467 Kids, we talked about side chatter. 4 00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:12,470 We've been dealing with these little weird toys called Labubu 5 00:00:12,471 --> 00:00:14,597 since the top of the year. The kids are obsessed. 6 00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,307 I don't even know how they're getting them. 7 00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:17,975 I mean, they're really expensive 8 00:00:17,976 --> 00:00:19,936 and that usually protects us from the worst kid crazes, 9 00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:22,814 but... ...these little demons found a way. 10 00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,025 The toys, not the students. 11 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:29,237 Keep your Labubus in your backpack. It is distracting. 12 00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:30,822 Margaret, hand it to me. 13 00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:34,075 Wait, this isn't a Labubu. What is this? 14 00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:35,327 It's a Lafufu. 15 00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:38,913 - A what? - And I'm selling 'em for $5 a pop. 16 00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:41,374 - No, you're not. - Okay. Four dollars? 17 00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,417 Now you're talking. Sold. 18 00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:05,398 Everyone shut the hell up. 19 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,441 {\an8}It's Teacher Appreciation Night at the Phillies game tomorrow 20 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,485 {\an8}- and we're going. - The whole school? 21 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:10,987 {\an8} Obviously not. 22 00:01:10,988 --> 00:01:12,905 {\an8}We have eight tickets. It's me and O'Shon and-- 23 00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:14,240 {\an8}Two non-teachers. 24 00:01:14,241 --> 00:01:15,909 {\an8}A beautiful principal and a sexy tech genius. 25 00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:18,077 {\an8}A ticket for Mr. Johnson, of course. 26 00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,620 {\an8}Also not a teacher. 27 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:21,998 {\an8}Yes, but he deserves one because he was in the Negro leagues. 28 00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:23,542 {\an8}Whoa, he was? 29 00:01:24,501 --> 00:01:26,211 {\an8}Can y'all stop interrupting my generosity? 30 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,922 {\an8}For the last five tickets... 31 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:33,718 {\an8}I don't know, scraping the bottom of the barrel. Gregory. 32 00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:35,886 {\an8}Yeah. I'm down. I've been meaning to get to a game this season. 33 00:01:35,887 --> 00:01:38,222 {\an8}- I'll bring my score book. - Melissa? 34 00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:41,017 {\an8}I've been trying to get to bed early, but you know what they say, 35 00:01:41,018 --> 00:01:43,269 {\an8}you're only alive this one brief time. 36 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,645 {\an8}I don't know. Barbara? 37 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:47,607 {\an8}Yes, please. Well, I can't wait to see that Kyle Schwarber. 38 00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:51,777 {\an8}- You know Kyle Schwarber? - Know him? 39 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:55,614 {\an8}He's the best left-handed power bat in the National League. 40 00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,450 {\an8}Been meaning to talk to him about his stance though. 41 00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:59,368 {\an8}You know, it is hurting him against the southpaws. 42 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:01,120 {\an8}Mm-hmm. 43 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:03,581 {\an8}What? I'm a baseball diva. 44 00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:07,209 {\an8}Gerald and I, oh we've been watching the game since before y'all were born. 45 00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,294 {\an8}Oh. 46 00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:11,214 {\an8}Okay. Maybe... 47 00:02:13,717 --> 00:02:14,967 {\an8}- Jacob. - Yes! 48 00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,886 {\an8}Citizens Bank Park and the Phillies 49 00:02:16,887 --> 00:02:19,347 {\an8}have this Red Goes Green sustainability program. 50 00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,890 {\an8}It's-It's pretty punk rock. 51 00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,142 {\an8}And the last ticket... 52 00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:24,518 {\an8}♪ Take me out ♪ 53 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:27,355 {\an8}♪ To the ball game ♪ 54 00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:28,898 {\an8}Janine, I guess. 55 00:02:28,899 --> 00:02:32,985 {\an8}Oh, no. Um, it's okay 'cause I don't really like baseball. 56 00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:36,656 {\an8}I've tried watching it on TV. It's just kind of boring and I don't understand it. 57 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:40,242 {\an8}I can never find the ball. It is so small. But it's okay. I'll pass. You can-- 58 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:42,703 Trust me, you will fall in love with the game in person, 59 00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:44,789 it is a completely different feeling. 60 00:02:44,790 --> 00:02:45,873 She'll take the ticket. 61 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,416 Well, that's everyone then. 62 00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:50,002 Thank me later, and I mean it with y'all ungrateful asses. 63 00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,382 So it's just Principal Coleman and her friends? 64 00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:55,759 Every single day. 65 00:02:57,386 --> 00:02:58,552 Did you get my text? 66 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:01,138 Yeah. Yeah, sounds cool. Thank you. 67 00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:03,432 I haven't been to a game in forever. You know, I'm-- 68 00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,810 Anyway, you and I are getting on the PhanaVision kiss cam, 69 00:03:05,811 --> 00:03:07,103 so plan accordingly. 70 00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:09,730 Okay, but you can't just get on the kiss cam. It's random. 71 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:12,566 Look at me. Look at you. We're gonna be on camera. 72 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,444 True. All right, bet. 73 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:17,363 Oh, also, we're taking my car. I can't be seen in your hooptie. 74 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:19,323 But they don't have cameras in the parking lot. 75 00:03:19,324 --> 00:03:21,493 You don't know that for sure. We can't take that chance. 76 00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:23,703 Do you see it? 77 00:03:23,704 --> 00:03:27,373 Whoo. Thank God this day is over. I'm ready for baseball. 78 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:31,252 It's gonna be so much fun as long as you don't wear that hat. 79 00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:33,130 Yeah, I didn't know it was bobblehead night. 80 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:36,425 A hat on a hat. 81 00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:39,802 You're not gonna get hit with a baseball. You don't need to wear a helmet. 82 00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:42,012 Yes, I'm sure everyone thinks that, until wapow! 83 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:44,598 Yeah, I've seen the YouTube blooper compilations. 84 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,892 It's gonna be great, I promise. 85 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,520 It's gonna be better than great. We are visiting the first team 86 00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:51,439 to join the Environmental Protection Agency's 87 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,024 - Green Power Partnership program. That-- - Jacob. 88 00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,734 Jacob, don't ruin baseball. 89 00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:58,612 It's gonna be a blast. You got food, you got beer, you got a place to sit. 90 00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:00,614 God-fearing men playing for his glory. 91 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:02,366 And they're nice enough to do it in tight pants. 92 00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:04,452 - Amen. - What's not to love? 93 00:04:04,453 --> 00:04:06,162 Well, some people go for the love of the sport, 94 00:04:06,163 --> 00:04:08,497 but, you know, whatever gets you to the ballpark. 95 00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:09,582 Well, then, let's hop to it 96 00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:12,251 'cause I got to count all of the players wearing crosses 97 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,711 before I talk to Schwarbs. 98 00:04:13,712 --> 00:04:17,090 Wait, they play in jewelry? Isn't that dangerous? No? 99 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,135 - You got your-- You sure? - I got my phone. Yeah. 100 00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:22,386 - Come on. - All right. 101 00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:24,054 We can do this later. Can't miss first pitch. 102 00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:25,890 - Really? A book? - It's in case I get bored. 103 00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:28,684 I thought about bringing a wet blanket, but I see we already got one. 104 00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:31,312 You know, every time a Phillies player hits a home run, 105 00:04:31,313 --> 00:04:33,147 they plant a tree in the Delaware Valley. 106 00:04:33,148 --> 00:04:35,524 Jacob, you cannot do this to me for the whole game. Please. 107 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,526 - Hold up. - Me? Oh. 108 00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,445 Am I not allowed to wear the batting helmet? 109 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:42,323 Uh, it's weird, but you can. But that bag can't come in. 110 00:04:42,324 --> 00:04:45,326 Oh, my God. Hey, guys, just go on without me. 111 00:04:45,327 --> 00:04:46,994 We'll be right... They are gone. 112 00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:48,412 Damn, they didn't even look back. 113 00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:50,998 All bags need to be clear, small, or left in your car. 114 00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,083 All right, you know what? You just go ahead and-and, um, 115 00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:55,587 I'm going to run back to the car really fast, okay? 116 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:58,881 I just need the keys. And where did we park? 117 00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:00,884 Also, how would one get to our seats? 118 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,677 It's okay. We'll just go together. 119 00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:07,473 And now the starting lineup with the visiting Atlanta Braves. 120 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:08,933 - Maybe we go quickly? Yeah? - Yeah. 121 00:05:08,934 --> 00:05:10,100 Hop on my back. 122 00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:11,727 Gregory, I can run. Jesus. 123 00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,145 - Oh, okay. - Okay. 124 00:05:14,272 --> 00:05:16,190 Actually, um, if I... I-I'll do the back. 125 00:05:16,191 --> 00:05:17,274 - Yeah. - Yeah. 126 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:18,819 Here we go. 127 00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:30,413 It's a beautiful night for baseball. 128 00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:34,750 Remember we have to sit in the middle of the row. 129 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:36,710 The PhanaVision cameras never go for the aisle. 130 00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:38,921 Seeing the stairs makes the ballpark look empty. 131 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:40,841 Yeah. Yeah, I got you. 132 00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:47,179 Mr. Johnson, how'd you beat us here? 133 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,058 I know some people. They let me use the special entrance. 134 00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:53,435 You came in through the tunnel? 135 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,437 Isn't that where the Phillie Phanatic comes out? 136 00:05:55,438 --> 00:05:58,232 You know what? I don't even know why I asked. Just stay focused. 137 00:05:58,233 --> 00:06:00,317 Hey, Barb, what seat do you want? 138 00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:04,405 Kyle! Kyle Schwarber! Kyle! 139 00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:08,618 It's me, Barbara Howard! I'm a teacher! 140 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:12,372 - Look over here! - That's a dedicated woman right there. 141 00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:17,502 It's Teacher Appreciation Night at Citizens Bank Park. 142 00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:22,131 Wow, we are really close. Good thing I brought protection. 143 00:06:22,132 --> 00:06:23,215 I mean my helmet. 144 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,550 - Oh. Yeah, I-I know. - Okay. 145 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:28,053 Um, these are nice seats, right? It feels good to be teacher appreciated. 146 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,305 Yeah. 147 00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:33,517 All right. Scorecard, pen, red pen, permanent marker. 148 00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:34,894 We made it. 149 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,855 - Mmm. All right! So ball game, check. - Uh-huh. 150 00:06:37,856 --> 00:06:40,024 Peanuts and Cracker Jack, when? 151 00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:41,984 Because they really hyped that up in the song. 152 00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,527 Uh, soon. The vendors will come by. 153 00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:46,113 Oh, they come by? How would they know when we're hungry? 154 00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:47,823 Oh. Oh. 155 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,742 - Is it a home run? - Uh, no, the game just started. 156 00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:50,868 Oh, okay. 157 00:06:50,869 --> 00:06:53,037 Oh. Uh-oh, now they're booing. 158 00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:54,413 Well, they hate the other team. 159 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:55,624 - Oh, right. - Yeah. 160 00:06:56,875 --> 00:06:59,002 - Okay, you're smiling. What happened? - Ah! 161 00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,211 First pitch, right on time. 162 00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:03,797 Mmm. Which one is Mike Schmidt? 163 00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:08,094 Come on, Phillies! Let's go! Let's go! 164 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,639 What happened? I can't see. 165 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:16,185 You know, I bet they could start collecting all the sunflower seeds 166 00:07:16,186 --> 00:07:18,854 and, uh, the peanut shells and save them for composting. 167 00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:20,023 I'm going to kill this guy. 168 00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,358 Don't those two live together? 169 00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:25,778 Stop worrying about them. Look forward, stay sexy, and lock in. 170 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:27,488 I wonder where the landscaping team sits. 171 00:07:27,489 --> 00:07:29,406 - Hey, Gregory. Do you know-- - Huh? 172 00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,742 Okay, that's enough. I'm going to the concession stand. 173 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:33,285 - Excuse me, Barb. - Oh. I'll come with. 174 00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:35,788 I want to get a closer look at their dual stream trash cans. 175 00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,415 They're made out of HDPE recycled plastics. 176 00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,876 It's-It's basically trash made out of trash. 177 00:07:40,877 --> 00:07:43,088 Yeah. Well, Mr. Johnson would like that. 178 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:45,673 Hey, where's Mr. Johnson? 179 00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:47,132 Where did Mr. Johnson go? 180 00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:49,718 I don't know, but he's missing the Phanatic. 181 00:07:58,061 --> 00:08:00,437 Oh, did you put on that lip mask I gave you last night? 182 00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:02,606 No, I was never gonna do that. 183 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:03,942 Put this on. 184 00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:07,194 So my lips look dewy after the kiss cam kiss. 185 00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:10,073 Oh, yeah. Nah, baby. 186 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:20,040 Now batting for the Phillies, number 12, 187 00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:24,212 designated hitter Kyle Schwarber. 188 00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,678 That's a Schwarbomb. 189 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:39,393 Did you know that somewhere in this ballpark there is a Phillies garden 190 00:08:39,394 --> 00:08:41,854 - that provides fresh produce to all-- - For the love of God. 191 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,522 - Jacob, please. - What? It's inspiring. 192 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:46,567 Okay, here's what we're going to do. We're going to do the 999 Challenge. 193 00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:49,695 Is that when you try and swallow like nine ounces of cinnamon or something? 194 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:53,283 No, what? No, it's nine hot dogs, nine beers in nine innings. 195 00:08:53,908 --> 00:08:55,534 - Oh, okay. What, like for a cause? - Yeah. 196 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,119 Yeah, the cause is to shut you up. 197 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,203 - All right. - Okay. 198 00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,748 But also if you successfully complete the challenge, 199 00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,168 I'm gonna give you your own shelf in the fridge at home. 200 00:09:04,127 --> 00:09:06,336 I don't know. That sounds like a lot of processed food. 201 00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:07,838 I was gonna get a cheesesteak. 202 00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:10,382 Yeah, right. What, with the organic Cheez Whiz? 203 00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,759 Without. 204 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,845 No dogs, no shelf. 205 00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:18,098 Now, are we talking in addition to the door shelf I already have? 206 00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:19,683 Instead of. 207 00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:20,935 I am in. 208 00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:23,937 Okay, two dogs and two beers please, ladies. 209 00:09:23,938 --> 00:09:25,022 Pay them. 210 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:27,066 Thank you. Perfect. 211 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,527 Hey, where do you guys source your dogs? 212 00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:40,120 Okay. So he, uh, spilled his popcorn on me. 213 00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:43,165 So I'm guessing something good happened. Explain it to me like I'm five. 214 00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:45,209 Oh, well, we're in between plays. 215 00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:47,544 I think he just really liked the batter's walk-up song. 216 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:51,091 This just isn't for me. I might go home at halftime. 217 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,344 Don't tell me they don't have a halftime. 218 00:09:55,136 --> 00:09:58,597 It's time for the Phillies dance cam! 219 00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:06,481 Well, this part is fun. I like this. 220 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:08,691 Oh, my God. 221 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:11,319 Oh. Um. 222 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:16,157 My girlfriend's on the dance cam! My girlfriend's on the dance cam! 223 00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,450 But she's on the aisle! 224 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:21,161 They're all on the aisle. Who the hell's running this thing? 225 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:25,749 Look at that little girl go! I think we have our winner! 226 00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:30,255 No one ever beats a kid. 227 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:33,258 Go Phillies! 228 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:38,763 Oh, my God. Another one. 229 00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:41,641 That's two... That's two home runs. 230 00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:45,144 Is he gonna do it? 231 00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:49,022 Is he gonna do it? Yes! Ah! 232 00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:52,276 - And the crowd goes... - Wild! 233 00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:55,113 Okay, look alive, kid. Round six coming up. 234 00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:57,197 How are you feeling? 235 00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:58,991 - I feel incredible. - All right. 236 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:00,784 This is easy shelf, honey. 237 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:02,579 The hell did you call me? 238 00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:04,706 - What's up? - Oh, no. 239 00:11:05,707 --> 00:11:08,792 What... What if we did, like, the 666 Challenge? 240 00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,838 No, uh-uh. Man up or give up, you choose. 241 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,048 Where have you been, Mr. Johnson? 242 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:18,636 Handling business. Why don't you try minding your own, handsome? 243 00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:21,722 Oh, my God. What? 244 00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:24,683 If you're looking for the Phillie Phanatic, don't worry, 245 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,602 he's rooting for a hot dog challenge. 246 00:11:26,603 --> 00:11:29,771 Oh. That sounds fun, right? 247 00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:31,316 I have other plans. 248 00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,861 Baby, I'm gonna run to the bathroom after this inning, 249 00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:38,405 but I need you to keep an eye on Mr. Johnson while I'm gone. 250 00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:41,700 For example, does he stay in his seat? If not, where does he go? 251 00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:44,745 Uh-uh. Either go to the bathroom now or wait till the next inning starts. 252 00:11:44,746 --> 00:11:47,748 The kiss cam happens in between innings, and I need you on your mark. 253 00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:49,584 All right, all right. I'll be right back. 254 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,922 Oh, no, the other team hit the ball! 255 00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:58,175 And it is stopped by Sosa. Sosa fires to Turner. 256 00:11:58,176 --> 00:12:00,844 Turner fires to Harper. Oh, my God, a triple play! 257 00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:08,353 That's it? Wait! No! Foul! Challenge! 258 00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:11,647 Okay, chow down, buddy. There you go. 259 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:13,649 - What? - Yeah, triple play. 260 00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:16,945 It's almost the bottom of the inning. It's almost time for another round. 261 00:12:17,487 --> 00:12:20,864 Oh, my God. God, I feel so alive. 262 00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:22,991 Gregory, write that down. Write down I feel alive. 263 00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:25,035 - See? Baseball. - Uh, yeah. 264 00:12:25,036 --> 00:12:26,120 Oh. 265 00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:28,914 Oh, my God, look at this. This is community. 266 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:31,917 - You didn't tell me about the community. - Well, I thought it was a given. 267 00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:35,796 Pucker up, buttercup. It's time for kiss cam! 268 00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,091 No. Where is he? 269 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:42,094 Men never have to wait for the bathroom. That's the whole point of being a man. 270 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:43,345 Who are you even talking to? 271 00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:47,015 Oh. 272 00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:50,936 - That's not my man. - I certainly am not. Ew. 273 00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:53,605 What do you mean "ew"? Ew me? Ew. 274 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,565 Over here, over here. 275 00:12:55,566 --> 00:12:59,903 Kyle. Kyle Schwarber. You are up next. 276 00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:04,033 You've been out on your front foot. Do it like this. 277 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:09,163 Schwarber, over here! 278 00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:11,415 Oh! 279 00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:13,000 Ooh. 280 00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:17,254 Hope that little girl is okay. Anything can happen at a Phillies game. 281 00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:21,426 Can we get that camera off them now? That young man is going to be sick. 282 00:13:23,469 --> 00:13:26,680 Everything looks okay, although your breathing is a little weird. 283 00:13:26,681 --> 00:13:27,931 - Oh, no, that's normal. - Mmm. 284 00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:29,725 - Big energy, little lungs. - Mm-hmm. 285 00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:33,020 Right. Well, take it easy in here for a bit just to be sure. 286 00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:35,106 - Okay. Thank you. - I'll check back in a few. 287 00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,859 Janine, I'm sorry. 288 00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,360 You didn't even want to come to this game, 289 00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:42,696 and now you're on the injured list and receiving first aid. 290 00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:46,033 I just wanted you to love baseball as much as I did, 291 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:47,534 but I forced it and now you-- 292 00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:48,619 I love it. 293 00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:51,288 - You what? - Yes, I mean... 294 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:54,249 ...look, I might not know what a 6-4-3 triple play is 295 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:57,044 or how to "read a scoreboard" or where we even parked, 296 00:13:57,045 --> 00:14:00,380 but I do know this, I'm gonna walk out of this ballpark 297 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:04,009 with stories I'm gonna tell forever and even more love for my city. 298 00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:10,140 And if that's baseball, then swing batter, batter. I love it. Ow. 299 00:14:10,141 --> 00:14:12,267 - You sure you're okay? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 300 00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:16,146 40,000 people watching the same game, eating the same snacks... 301 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:17,856 ...waiting for a fumble. 302 00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:19,316 - Strikeout. - I get why they call it 303 00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:20,525 - the beautiful game. - Soccer. 304 00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:22,736 It feels like you belong to something bigger. 305 00:14:24,113 --> 00:14:26,615 Hi, I'm Cooper with the Phillies. You must be Janine? 306 00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:30,494 I am. Wait, am I famous now? 307 00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,370 - We will take the free tickets... - Uh-huh. 308 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:35,207 ...and I am literally the biggest Phillies fan I think ever. 309 00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:37,542 I got something better than season tickets. 310 00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:40,046 How would you like to meet the Phillie Phanatic? 311 00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,839 - Even better. - Are the tickets still an option? 312 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,341 Whoo! 313 00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:45,885 Yeah! 314 00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:50,972 And that's Schwarbomb number three. 315 00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:53,183 His 48th of the season. 316 00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:55,311 Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo! 317 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:04,445 MVP! MVP! MVP! 318 00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:07,864 - You can keep that. - Can I? 319 00:15:10,660 --> 00:15:12,453 Still can't believe you missed kiss cam. 320 00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:16,915 If you had let me go to the bathroom when I wanted to, I would've been here. 321 00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:20,128 Baby, you got control issues. 322 00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:25,133 Well, if we're being real about it, 323 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:29,345 this is the first time I've gotten to sit in the stands with the person I'm dating. 324 00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:32,889 Because usually they're too busy playing on the field 325 00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:34,349 or on the court or on the ice, 326 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:37,812 so I just wanted to do all the normal people things I never could. 327 00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:42,191 Because, you know, I'm used to being with professional athletes. 328 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:44,694 Was that supposed to be a sad story? 329 00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:47,321 Just reminding you of who I've dated. 330 00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:52,659 I mean, even though your reasons are a little superficial, 331 00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:55,037 I admit kiss cam would have been cute. 332 00:15:55,538 --> 00:15:59,416 So, I tried to do the next best thing. 333 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,176 That's sweet. 334 00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:11,094 - That's cute. Yeah. - That's cute? 335 00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:13,305 Good job. 336 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,016 Let's go, Phillies! 337 00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:21,771 That's Kyle Schwarber's fourth home run tonight. 338 00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:24,525 Yes! 339 00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:30,031 That's right. 340 00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:35,243 Let's do it. 341 00:16:35,244 --> 00:16:36,661 I'm out. I can't do it! 342 00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:39,873 Yeah, no one thought you could. It's okay. 343 00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:42,209 You managed not to talk about the environment for a couple of hours. 344 00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,794 I'm gonna give you a shelf anyway. 345 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:48,089 You really pulled off the 999 Challenge. 346 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:50,383 More like 10108. I finished last inning. 347 00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:51,468 Give me this. 348 00:16:51,469 --> 00:16:52,553 Mr. J. 349 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,096 Don't mind if I do. 350 00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:58,016 - Hey, Abbott group, right? - Yeah. 351 00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:00,727 I just wanted to let you know your friend Janine only has ten minutes left. 352 00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:01,853 Of life? 353 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,563 Sorry, I should've phrased that differently. 354 00:17:03,564 --> 00:17:05,232 She has ten minutes left with the medic. 355 00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,733 - Oh. - She's totally fine. 356 00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,777 And about to meet the Phanatic. Wanna join? 357 00:17:08,778 --> 00:17:11,488 Sorry, can't, got something else to attend to. 358 00:17:11,489 --> 00:17:13,573 - Yeah. - Cool. Game's almost over. 359 00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,408 So let's go see your friend while she's still here. 360 00:17:15,409 --> 00:17:17,495 - All right. - Can you please stop saying it like that? 361 00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:20,206 - Thanks. - She's safe. 362 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,086 Congratulations to Kyle Schwarber on his four home runs. 363 00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:28,798 He now leads the National League. 364 00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:32,300 - Yeah. - All right, everyone, as promised, 365 00:17:32,301 --> 00:17:36,388 someone very special wants to meet you, the Phillie Phanatic. 366 00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:37,974 Hey! 367 00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:41,726 - Wow! - Hey. 368 00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:43,562 Oh! Ooh! 369 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:46,731 I-I knew it. I... I knew it. You're the... You're the Phillie Phanatic. 370 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:47,941 - Yeah. - Yeah. 371 00:17:47,942 --> 00:17:49,484 - Yes. - No, y'all, no. 372 00:17:49,485 --> 00:17:51,736 Mr. Johnson is the Phillie Phanatic. 373 00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:53,405 What gave it away? 374 00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:55,490 All day I've never seen you and the Phanatic 375 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,284 in the same place at the same time. 376 00:17:57,285 --> 00:18:00,537 I never see you and Shemar Moore in the same place at the same time either, 377 00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:04,457 but I don't go around asking you a bunch of questions about Soul Train. 378 00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:06,626 Wh... What? What about the green fuzz that you had on you? 379 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,420 You kept getting up to leave every other inning. 380 00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:11,965 We ran into each other, gave me a big hug. We go way back. 381 00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:14,301 And I was getting up because I had to go pee. 382 00:18:14,302 --> 00:18:16,303 I hope that's okay with you. 383 00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:18,513 - I... - You really believed that, huh? 384 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:22,767 Oh. Uh, that's so nice. It hurts a little bit though, but it's so nice. 385 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:25,604 Okay, folks, we have one more special surprise. 386 00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:27,647 - Oh... - Mr. Kyle Schwarber. 387 00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:29,065 Oh! 388 00:18:30,318 --> 00:18:33,778 Hey, guys. Thank you. How's it going? 389 00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:36,197 Hey, I'm sure that you get this all the time, 390 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:38,241 but I love the ballpark. It's a beautiful home. 391 00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:40,035 Oh. I appreciate that. Thank you, guys. 392 00:18:40,036 --> 00:18:41,704 - So cool. - Hey, guys. 393 00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:45,832 - Oh, I'm taken. - Okay. I'm sorry. Um... 394 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:49,044 Hey, so I heard I hit a little girl on the dance cam. 395 00:18:49,045 --> 00:18:52,339 Oh. That was me, but I'm 29 and a half. 396 00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:55,800 Oh, okay, well, I'm sorry, these are for you. I'm so sorry. 397 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:58,178 Oh. Thank you. Co-Could you sign my-my helmet? 398 00:18:58,179 --> 00:19:00,013 I was wearing it 'cause I didn't want to get hit in the head 399 00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:01,389 and I took it off and I got hit in the head. 400 00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:03,475 - Absolutely. - It was crazy. 401 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:06,144 - Didn't take it off all day. - It was his fault. 402 00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,937 - Thank you. That's okay. - I'm so sorry. 403 00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:10,065 All right, Barb, now's your shot. Come on. 404 00:19:12,443 --> 00:19:18,658 Mr. Kyle Schwarber, I've been waiting all day to say this to you. 405 00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:22,619 Hello. 406 00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:25,747 Oh, hi. Um... Can I sign your jersey? 407 00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:29,334 - Oh. Yes. Yeah. - Awesome. Yeah. 408 00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,711 - Oh. And this too please. - Awesome. Thank you. Yeah. 409 00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:34,005 - I'll hold that. There you go. - Absolutely. Thank you. 410 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:37,926 - You're not gonna resell these, are you? - No, gonna sell 'em once. 411 00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:39,177 - Good one. - Hey, Schwarbie, do you know 412 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,137 the carbon footprint of this place? 413 00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:42,722 Uh... 414 00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:45,266 Mr. Schwarber, this is my boyfriend. He's 29 and a half too. 415 00:19:45,267 --> 00:19:46,768 You don't have to say how old I am. 416 00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:48,687 Four home runs, man. That's a hell of a game. 417 00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:52,732 I appreciate that, dude. Thank you. Yeah, that was a fun game. 418 00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,818 There you go. Thanks, man. What a night. It was awesome. 419 00:19:54,819 --> 00:19:57,529 - He ruined my stats. He ruined my work. - But it's Kyle Schwarber. 420 00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:58,947 - How about a group picture? - Yes! 421 00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:02,410 Absolutely. Let's do it, guys. Come on. There we go. Let's go. 422 00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:05,245 - But I... How am I supposed to-- - It's okay. It's fine. 423 00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:07,122 Everyone say Phillies. 424 00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:09,916 - Phillies! - Whoop, whoop, whoop! 425 00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,668 You guys go ahead. I'm gonna catch up. 426 00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:14,212 - Thank you, guys. I'm so sorry... - Okay. Bye. 427 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,047 Thank you so much. Great game. 428 00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:18,925 - Such a pleasure. Great night, man. - I appreciate you. Thank you. 429 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:20,927 - Four home runs. Wow. - Yeah, okay, that's good. 430 00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:23,305 - All right. Oh. - Hang on. I got something for you. 431 00:20:23,806 --> 00:20:25,057 Okay, what we got? 432 00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:30,311 That was a hell of a game. There you go. Good job, man. 433 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:31,856 I will take that. Thank you. 434 00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:38,194 And so I said to Kyle Schwarber, 435 00:20:38,195 --> 00:20:42,449 "Son, don't be out on your front foot. Keep your weight back." 436 00:20:42,450 --> 00:20:45,160 - Not what happened. - How would you know, Gregory? 437 00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:46,953 You were too busy coloring, 438 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,122 letting your girlfriend get popped in the head. 439 00:20:49,123 --> 00:20:54,127 Guys, could we maybe turn the lights off and play the quiet game? 440 00:20:54,128 --> 00:20:56,212 How are you this hungover? 441 00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:59,591 I eat ten hot dogs and ten beers every night. Grow up, Jacob. 442 00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:01,551 {\an8}Well, it sounds like y'all caught a great game. 443 00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:02,635 {\an8}- Mm-hmm. - We did. 444 00:21:02,636 --> 00:21:04,596 {\an8}And if anyone wants to relive the action, 445 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:07,557 {\an8}I got Kyle Schwarber autographs 50 bucks a pop. 446 00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:12,437 {\an8}That's cute. I got these Lafufus signed by Kyle Schwarber. 447 00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:15,149 {\an8}You bought those signatures off me and put them on Lafufus? 448 00:21:17,151 --> 00:21:18,234 {\an8}That's a smart kid. Hmm. 449 00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:22,239 {\an8}Is that a Kyle Schwarber Lafufu? Don't mind if I la-do-do. 450 00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:24,366 {\an8}I'll take two.