1
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:06,047
[school bell rings]

2
00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:08,633
- I'm sorry I was late,
Miss Melons.

3
00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:11,845
I promise
it'll never happen again.

4
00:00:12,595 --> 00:00:14,597
- I'm sorry,
can we take a short break?

5
00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:15,765
I just have a tiny question.

6
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,100
- Okay. Make it quick, Bambi.

7
00:00:17,183 --> 00:00:19,227
Blackboard's a rental.
- Right.

8
00:00:19,310 --> 00:00:21,271
Just wondering, should I really
be punishing her?

9
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:24,065
- Uh, yeah. That's kind of
the premise of the magazine.

10
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:25,483
- No, I get that.

11
00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:28,486
It's just that maybe she
was tardy for a reason.

12
00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:31,364
Did anyone ask her?
Maybe there's trouble at home.

13
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:33,199
- Sexy trouble.

14
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:37,954
- These are the naughty
schoolgirls of Bad Girl High.

15
00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:39,497
They do bad stuff.
- Mm-hmm.

16
00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:42,375
- You spank their bottoms.
That's the whole story.

17
00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:43,710
- Typically, yes.

18
00:00:43,793 --> 00:00:46,421
Uh, but maybe not
in this instance.

19
00:00:46,504 --> 00:00:48,798
Okay? Staci, please rise.

20
00:00:50,383 --> 00:00:52,385
Hey, you can tell me.

21
00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:54,804
Was there a reason that you
were late this morning?

22
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,598
- Uh...

23
00:00:58,099 --> 00:00:59,893
Um...

24
00:00:59,976 --> 00:01:02,312
my dad was working late.

25
00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:04,564
- Right. 'Cause he's a cop

26
00:01:04,647 --> 00:01:07,817
and he works the graveyard
shift with his partner, Rico.

27
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:10,278
- Yeah.
Yeah, and there was a shootout.

28
00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:11,821
- And Rico didn't make it,

29
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,448
so you were comforting
your dad.

30
00:01:13,531 --> 00:01:16,534
- Well, since Mom died,
I'm all he's got.

31
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:18,787
- And for this
she is getting spanked?

32
00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:20,455
We should be supporting her,

33
00:01:20,538 --> 00:01:23,124
not punishing her
for her kindness.

34
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:25,335
Times they are a-changing,
Phil.

35
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,879
Staci needs to be
getting her degree

36
00:01:27,962 --> 00:01:30,840
so she can bring this
compassion to the workforce.

37
00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:32,675
- I don't know what the fuck
you're talking about,

38
00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:34,302
but this is the energy we need.

39
00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:35,845
- I'm trying to make
an important point here, Phil.

40
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:37,972
- This isn't "Minx."
We don't do points.

41
00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:39,015
Stacy, bend over.

42
00:01:39,098 --> 00:01:41,351
And, uh, lick the apple.

43
00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:43,394
[The Rhino's
"Gimme Gimme Good Lovin'"]

44
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:44,687
♪ ♪

45
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:47,190
- ♪ Gimme, gimme good lovin' ♪

46
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:49,192
♪ Every night ♪

47
00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:51,736
You know it's all right now.
child.

48
00:01:51,820 --> 00:01:54,030
- Hey, Terri.
- Hi.

49
00:01:54,113 --> 00:01:56,449
- Ooh, lookin' good, Joel.
- Ah, thanks, Joyce.

50
00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:57,742
- Great.

51
00:01:57,826 --> 00:02:00,912
Oh, Alisdair.
He got his fur washed.

52
00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:04,374
Hey.
Carnal Coeds back in session,

53
00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:06,084
are they?
- I wish.

54
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:08,336
I'm somehow on the tenure track
at Bad Girl High.

55
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:10,547
Speaking of,
if there's any way

56
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,131
I can be more involved
at "Minx"...

57
00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:13,633
- What happened to
centerfold coordination?

58
00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:15,134
- Well, turns out that's
a two-day-a-month job,

59
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:16,719
but I have
30 days of inspiration.

60
00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,471
- Well yeah, sure.
What do you have in mind?

61
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:22,433
- Um, I could always do the,
um...

62
00:02:23,643 --> 00:02:26,646
Or, um, you know the, uh...

63
00:02:26,729 --> 00:02:28,398
- You know what?
You just have a think

64
00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:29,732
and you let me know.
- Okay.

65
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:31,359
- Okay?
- Bonjour, ma belle.

66
00:02:31,442 --> 00:02:32,527
- Bonjour.

67
00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:33,862
- Guess what you
get to approve?

68
00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:35,738
- Oh, my God, really?
Already?

69
00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:37,824
How do they look?
- Oh, decent.

70
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:40,326
I think maybe next time
I'd go two stops darker.

71
00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:41,619
But, uh, you tell me.

72
00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:43,413
- Oh, they're even better
than I imagined.

73
00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:44,956
- Oh, thank God
you think so too!

74
00:02:45,039 --> 00:02:47,000
- I love that we're saying
something, you know?

75
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:48,918
You see the pain in his eyes?

76
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:51,212
It's like he's internalizing
the harassment

77
00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:52,922
endured by generations
of women.

78
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,215
- That's actually the moment

79
00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:55,925
he found out
what we're paying him.

80
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,343
- Oh, well--
- Hey, kid.

81
00:02:57,427 --> 00:02:58,720
- Yeah?
- You ready to go?

82
00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:00,805
- Yes.
Been ready my whole life.

83
00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:02,891
Just selling ad space
for my magazine.

84
00:03:02,974 --> 00:03:04,267
- He's taking you with him?
- Yup.

85
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:05,393
Culmination
of a childhood dream.

86
00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:06,811
No big deal.

87
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,104
It is a big deal.

88
00:03:08,187 --> 00:03:09,564
- I'm here if you need me.
- Great.

89
00:03:09,647 --> 00:03:10,732
- Right on!

90
00:03:12,317 --> 00:03:14,569
I'm not recognizing
a lot of these buyers.

91
00:03:14,652 --> 00:03:16,321
What happened to
the mission-driven nonprofits

92
00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:18,114
I mentioned?
- Oh, we need companies

93
00:03:18,197 --> 00:03:19,991
who can actually
give us money.

94
00:03:20,074 --> 00:03:22,076
That's kind of how we finance
this operation

95
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,245
unless you wanna sell "Minx"
for 49.99.

96
00:03:24,329 --> 00:03:26,581
- I would pay that.
- Oh, cool. Well, that's one.

97
00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:28,374
- Oh, can we add the
Feminist Federal Credit Union?

98
00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:30,627
- Joycie, my ad guys
did their homework.

99
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,629
These are all huge gets.

100
00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:35,757
We'll be lucky if any
of these people want in, okay?

101
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,008
Don't be nervous.

102
00:03:37,091 --> 00:03:39,302
Just be your classy
Harvard self.

103
00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:41,471
- Vassar.
- Whatever.

104
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:45,642
Women's liberation.
What does it mean?

105
00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:47,769
Well, I'll tell you
what it means to me.

106
00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:52,148
It means liberating women
from the $400 million

107
00:03:52,231 --> 00:03:55,652
in disposable income
they spend every year.

108
00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:59,280
- Our format melds the precepts
of female emancipation

109
00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:02,241
with mature but thematically
appropriate content.

110
00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:06,079
We think of ourselves
as creating the female gaze.

111
00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:09,749
Women are sexual,
but it starts with the brain.

112
00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:16,005
- You see, one issue of "Cosmo"
sold over 3 million copies

113
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,299
in one month.

114
00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:20,510
Why? 'Cause that good old
Burt Reynolds

115
00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:23,554
showed his hairy thighs.

116
00:04:23,638 --> 00:04:25,348
Not your cup of tea,
maybe not mine.

117
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:26,683
Who cares?

118
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,059
[voice fades, echoes]
'Cause we're talking

119
00:04:28,142 --> 00:04:29,686
about money--a lot of money.

120
00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:31,813
And I'm guessing that's what--

121
00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:34,941
- So much flavor
in one little box.

122
00:04:35,024 --> 00:04:36,359
[tense chords]

123
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:37,694
- Wolfhagen.

124
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:41,197
Three beers takes me
from bow to wow!

125
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,449
- [laughing]

126
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:46,619
[Doug continues in background]

127
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,038
- Yum-derwear.

128
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:52,625
A candy coating
for that juicy center.

129
00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:54,544
- I'm telling you,
Minx is gonna give it to 'em

130
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,546
and we're gonna
give it to 'em good.

131
00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:58,548
[elevator bell dings]
Maybe two, but Pleasure Garden?

132
00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:00,258
I mean, they're huge
and they never had a way

133
00:05:00,341 --> 00:05:02,176
to market directly to women.
Now they do.

134
00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:06,055
So 10, 15 ads--
that alone pays for our book.

135
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,766
Kid,
we're gonna wet the panties

136
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:11,436
of every chick in America.
- [groans]

137
00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:16,149
- Hey, where're you going?
The car is that way.

138
00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:19,777
What's the problem, Joyce?
That went great.

139
00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:22,071
- The ads were an affront
to all womenkind.

140
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:25,825
And those products--
ball gags and French ticklers?

141
00:05:25,908 --> 00:05:27,827
- What's the pr--
do you hate sex?

142
00:05:27,910 --> 00:05:30,204
- No. No! It's--no.

143
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:32,331
I--it's just--it's--it's--

144
00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,292
No. It's supposed to be
private is all.

145
00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:36,878
And it's just people like me,
we don't discuss...

146
00:05:36,961 --> 00:05:38,421
vaginal lubricant.

147
00:05:38,504 --> 00:05:39,797
- Don't be such a snob.

148
00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:42,550
The world does not begin
and end in Pasadena.

149
00:05:42,633 --> 00:05:44,260
- Yeah.
Our magazine might, though.

150
00:05:44,343 --> 00:05:45,553
- Okay.

151
00:05:45,636 --> 00:05:47,430
- If want a certain kind
of reader,

152
00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:50,641
we have to advertise
upscale products.

153
00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:53,561
Okay? We gotta lure them in
with pantyhose

154
00:05:53,644 --> 00:05:55,730
and perfume--things that
make them feel safe.

155
00:05:55,813 --> 00:05:58,858
- You think I never tried
to get Cadillacs and caviar?

156
00:05:58,941 --> 00:06:01,194
Classy companies
have never put their ad

157
00:06:01,277 --> 00:06:02,862
across from a pair of titties.

158
00:06:02,945 --> 00:06:05,031
And they're certainly not going
anywhere near a dong.

159
00:06:05,114 --> 00:06:07,700
- Yeah, no. Obviously not when
you talk about it like that.

160
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,619
Maybe it's better
if I just speak with

161
00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:12,872
the high-end buyers directly.

162
00:06:12,955 --> 00:06:14,957
What?

163
00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:16,459
- What does she think
she's gonna do?

164
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:19,003
Just cold call
a shampoo company?

165
00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:20,546
- Doug.
- I mean, I only

166
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,465
brought her along so that
these guys would know

167
00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:24,133
that I was legit.

168
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:26,094
Tin, she's like the, um...

169
00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,346
she's like the hood ornament,
right?

170
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:30,640
But me, I'm the whole car.

171
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,183
- You done?
- No, I'm never done.

172
00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:34,227
You know that. But go ahead.

173
00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:36,771
- It pains me to say this,

174
00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:38,731
but they kind of liked
the hood ornament.

175
00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:40,900
Pleasure Garden called.
They want in.

176
00:06:40,983 --> 00:06:42,902
- No kidding?
- But their in-house guys

177
00:06:42,985 --> 00:06:44,487
don't know how to do
an ad for ladies,

178
00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:46,197
so they want us
to spec it for them.

179
00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:48,491
- [chuckles]
Joyce is gonna love this.

180
00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:50,993
You jokers hit the jackpot
on this one.

181
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:53,746
This ad is gonna write itself.

182
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:55,915
- All hail Lucifer's Horn.

183
00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:57,583
- What's the deal
with the double ends?

184
00:06:57,667 --> 00:06:59,544
Those "Minx" chicks got
two fox holes or something?

185
00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:01,003
- It's for lesbians, Perry.

186
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,005
You know, the only women
not attracted to you.

187
00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:04,340
- Give me five minutes
with 'em.

188
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:06,801
- Five minutes
seems about right.

189
00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:10,513
- There have to be better
advertisers than that.

190
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:12,265
- Do you get
who your audience is?

191
00:07:12,348 --> 00:07:15,518
I mean, "Minx" is for sexually
liberated chicks, okay?

192
00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:18,896
- Yes, but our penis is for
political purposes, okay?

193
00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,356
It's about shifting
power dynamics

194
00:07:20,439 --> 00:07:21,691
and gender reparations.

195
00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:23,192
- Kid,
I hate to break it to you,

196
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,194
but you can't control
what readers are gonna do

197
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,445
with that fireman's schlong.

198
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,281
Some might even jerk off to it.

199
00:07:28,364 --> 00:07:29,532
- I don't have to help them
do that.

200
00:07:29,615 --> 00:07:31,742
- And no one's asking you to.

201
00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:33,202
I got my best ad guys on it.

202
00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:36,622
[rock and roll music
in background]

203
00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:37,957
- Oh, my God.

204
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,042
I could have done
anything with my life.

205
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:41,586
I did quite well on the GRE.

206
00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:44,672
[smooth instrumental music]

207
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:51,721
♪ ♪

208
00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:53,306
- [sighs]

209
00:07:58,853 --> 00:08:01,814
[bright band music]

210
00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:05,902
♪ ♪

211
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:09,030
- Oh, my God.
It's as big as his thigh!

212
00:08:09,113 --> 00:08:11,532
Oh, Pedro, more tea please.

213
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,409
Thank you so much.
This is so cool.

214
00:08:13,492 --> 00:08:15,077
I feel like
a secret agent.

215
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,872
- Yeah, well, it might stay
a secret forever.

216
00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:19,916
Doug's ads, I'm telling you,
they could kill "Minx"

217
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,417
before it even
gets off the ground.

218
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:23,127
- I think you're overreacting.
Thank you.

219
00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:25,671
- Oh, really? You do?
Okay, so would be comfortable

220
00:08:25,755 --> 00:08:27,590
getting your nails done,
reading a magazine

221
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:29,967
full of double dongs.
- Double--doubles?

222
00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:32,094
Doubles, did you say?
- The Prigger sisters.

223
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,930
- [laughs] Hi, Mr. Ross.
- Hello, Mr. Ross.

224
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,848
- Oh, bacon.

225
00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:39,268
Your generation of ladies--
not afraid to eat.

226
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:40,937
- Oh.
- It does keep one alive.

227
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:44,273
- My wife, she swears by half
a grapefruit each morning

228
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,442
and then on Wednesday,
she adds cottage cheese.

229
00:08:46,525 --> 00:08:48,736
- Well, I've seen Bitsy
on the courts,

230
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,446
and she's looking
incredibly trim.

231
00:08:50,529 --> 00:08:52,698
- Yeah. If only she had
Joyce's forehand.

232
00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:55,076
- Oh, ha ha, well, she more
than makes up for it

233
00:08:55,159 --> 00:08:56,827
with that nasty backhand
of hers.

234
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,287
- Oh, pancakes.

235
00:08:58,371 --> 00:09:02,166
[laughs] I see someone
is treating themselves.

236
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:04,669
- How dare they!
[both laugh]

237
00:09:04,752 --> 00:09:06,254
"On Thursdays I permit Bitsy

238
00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:08,130
to loosen her girdle
by one notch."

239
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:09,757
- Oh, she sniffs
two blueberries

240
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,009
and then downs a fistful
of Dexedrine.

241
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:13,719
[laughs]
- How does that fossil

242
00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,137
stay in power?

243
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:16,847
Mr. Ross has been president
here for, what,

244
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:18,432
like, 30 years?
- Yeah.

245
00:09:18,516 --> 00:09:19,684
He's the richest.

246
00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:21,477
And all these men
love to suck up.

247
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:24,355
You know it's not just tea
parties and tennis here, Joyce.

248
00:09:24,438 --> 00:09:27,233
This is a place of business.

249
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:29,193
- I bet there are people here
who could teach me

250
00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:30,778
a thing or two
about advertising.

251
00:09:30,861 --> 00:09:33,406
You know, like, give me
the tools that I need

252
00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:35,324
to convince Doug
to let me do it my way.

253
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,618
- Well, yeah, I mean, there's
more CEOs on the golf course

254
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:41,455
right now than this Doug fella
has met in his entire life.

255
00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:43,916
[lively music]

256
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,043
- Mr. Irving.
Oh, I was so sorry

257
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:47,586
to hear about the tournament.

258
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:50,381
What happened to your niece,
it was a travesty.

259
00:09:50,464 --> 00:09:52,508
- She doesn't hold a candle
to you on the courts.

260
00:09:52,591 --> 00:09:54,802
- Oh.
- You were like a gazelle.

261
00:09:54,885 --> 00:09:58,055
- That is very sweet.
Um, while I have you--

262
00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,182
I'm in a new entrepreneurial
venture,

263
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,684
and I'd love to pick
your brain.

264
00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:03,311
How do you make ad buys?

265
00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,438
Is that agency based or
is that business to business?

266
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,398
- [yawns] I came here to relax,
Miss Prigger,

267
00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:09,525
not educate impudent
young ladies.

268
00:10:09,608 --> 00:10:10,860
- Uh-huh.

269
00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:12,737
What do you look for
in advertising partners?

270
00:10:12,820 --> 00:10:15,865
Just a vague description
would suffice.

271
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,700
- It's a magazine with a penis.

272
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:19,285
- That sounds very nice.

273
00:10:19,368 --> 00:10:22,538
- Yeah, thank you.
Thank you so much.

274
00:10:22,621 --> 00:10:26,292
- I like looking at pictures.
- Do you?

275
00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:29,045
- "While he's serving
his country,

276
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,464
she's serving herself."

277
00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:33,674
- Vietnam? I don't know, guys.

278
00:10:33,758 --> 00:10:35,676
Maybe we leave politics
out of it.

279
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,178
- Well, it's a cool gun
though, isn't it?

280
00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:38,971
- Yeah. And she has
a weapon of her own.

281
00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:40,222
See the symmetry?

282
00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:42,683
- No, I got it.
What's next, guys?

283
00:10:44,185 --> 00:10:46,729
- "No one will know your
dirty little secret."

284
00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:48,689
- [inhales sharply]
Kinda shamey, right?

285
00:10:48,773 --> 00:10:50,483
I mean, we want them to buy it.

286
00:10:50,566 --> 00:10:52,985
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay. Uh...

287
00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:56,072
"When you don't have a ring,
it's the next best thing."

288
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:57,406
- Okay, that's just mean.

289
00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:58,908
- Doesn't make it not true,
though.

290
00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:00,743
- Guys, we don't wanna bully
these women.

291
00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:02,119
We wanna get them off.

292
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:03,913
- Okay.
We did have this one other one.

293
00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,623
It might be a little closer
to what you're looking for.

294
00:11:05,706 --> 00:11:06,916
- Let's see it.
- We were thinking

295
00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:10,086
women love strength, right? Mm?

296
00:11:11,420 --> 00:11:13,214
"Trust the machine."

297
00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,093
- All right. Thanks, guys.
Great.

298
00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:18,511
- Well, that was a bust.

299
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:19,929
All they're willing to
talk to me about

300
00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:21,555
is my figure
and my tennis game.

301
00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:23,432
- Oh, your forehand
was a marvel.

302
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,768
But I guess they call it
a boys' club for a reason.

303
00:11:25,851 --> 00:11:27,228
- Oh, my God. What now?

304
00:11:27,311 --> 00:11:29,563
- Uh, Miss Prigger, um...
- Yeah, hi.

305
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:32,441
- Little bird told me that
you've been conducting business

306
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:33,859
on club grounds.

307
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,152
- Yeah, I was trying to,
anyway.

308
00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:36,821
- You boys
make it look so easy.

309
00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:39,115
- Then I became aware that you
are marketing explicit

310
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:41,784
and scandalous content
to young women?

311
00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:45,287
- I wouldn't call women's
liberation scandalous.

312
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,289
- Well, you always were

313
00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:50,376
the club rabble-rouser,
weren't you?

314
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:53,379
- I don't wanna be mean, Doug,

315
00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:54,964
but these make me hate myself,

316
00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:56,465
and I love myself.

317
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:57,800
- These make me hate men.

318
00:11:57,883 --> 00:11:59,301
And they kind of make me
hate you.

319
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,262
- Oh, yeah. For sure.
- Please simmer down.

320
00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:02,721
That's why I brought you guys
in here,

321
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:04,515
to get a female perspective,
right?

322
00:12:04,598 --> 00:12:06,225
So I don't know. Bambi,

323
00:12:06,308 --> 00:12:07,852
what would make you
buy a vibrator?

324
00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,687
- I don't know--I have a whole
drawer full already.

325
00:12:09,770 --> 00:12:13,149
But, I don't know, maybe if it
tickled a little deeper

326
00:12:13,232 --> 00:12:17,111
or if it went, like, a--
[makes rhythmic buzzing noise]

327
00:12:17,194 --> 00:12:18,988
Like a syncopation thing.

328
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:20,489
Or maybe if it played music.

329
00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:22,408
Oh, also price is important.
I'm on a budget.

330
00:12:22,491 --> 00:12:24,160
- These are all really great.

331
00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:27,037
Any ideas how to take that
brainstorm and put it on paper?

332
00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:29,373
- Um...

333
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,168
[sighs] No.

334
00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:34,879
I guess I can't be a magazine
advertising person.

335
00:12:34,962 --> 00:12:36,422
- [whistle]

336
00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:40,259
Guess who harpooned a whale!

337
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:42,553
- Whoo!

338
00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,346
[claps] Yeah!

339
00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:46,849
- And then he said,
"I personally find nudity

340
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:49,727
"to be distasteful, but I
believe this venture of yours

341
00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:52,021
will be popular
with modern women."

342
00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,856
And I think he meant "modern"
like an insult,

343
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:55,357
but I will take what I can get.

344
00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:57,401
- Beckley Cosmetics?
I never heard of them.

345
00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,862
- It's just one of Mr. Ross'
many holdings,

346
00:12:59,945 --> 00:13:01,197
a fact that you would know

347
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,781
if you had researched
upscale markets.

348
00:13:02,865 --> 00:13:04,825
- Beckley's market
is the old folks' home.

349
00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:07,703
No one under 80 wears it.
- And they test on bunnies.

350
00:13:07,786 --> 00:13:10,206
- Oh, my God.
Enough with the bunnies, okay?

351
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:12,541
All they do is shit and fuck.
- So do we.

352
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:14,210
- How many ads
is this guy buying?

353
00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:16,504
- We will know after our pitch
at the club tomorrow,

354
00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:20,049
5:00 on the dot
during the Summer Soirée.

355
00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:23,594
- Great.
Well, let me know how it goes.

356
00:13:23,677 --> 00:13:25,054
- Uh, y--well, actually,

357
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:27,389
I--I suggested to Mr. Ross

358
00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:29,225
that he sit with you as well.

359
00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:30,684
Just out of respect, you know,

360
00:13:30,768 --> 00:13:32,311
so that we both have a voice
in the process.

361
00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:34,897
- He wants to meet
your male publisher.

362
00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:37,066
- All right, fine.
There is a patriarchal mindset

363
00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:38,567
amongst the establishment.

364
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,778
But that is exactly
why we need "Minx," okay?

365
00:13:40,861 --> 00:13:43,030
It's to dismantle these systems
of oppression.

366
00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:44,698
- One lipstick ad at a time.

367
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:47,243
- I wanna go on record
and say that this is bullshit.

368
00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:49,870
It's a rich-girl-favor meeting

369
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,164
and I will come
and I will give it my best,

370
00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:53,749
but if this doesn't work,

371
00:13:53,832 --> 00:13:55,584
you're all in on
the Pleasure Garden.

372
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,920
- Your skepticism is my fuel.

373
00:13:58,003 --> 00:13:59,588
- Ooh, we're shaking.
- Mm-hmm.

374
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:01,799
- Saddle up, partners, we're
going to the "cunty" club.

375
00:14:01,882 --> 00:14:03,259
- Um...
- Well, if you're gonna

376
00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:04,677
drag me to some lame party,

377
00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:06,220
I'm bringing people
who can hang.

378
00:14:06,303 --> 00:14:09,014
- Well, it's just they won't
have fun there.

379
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:10,266
- Clubs are a gas.

380
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,684
JP Getty and I
used to make love

381
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:13,269
on the golf course
at Maidstone.

382
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:15,354
- Mm. And I love mingling
with the colonizers.

383
00:14:15,437 --> 00:14:17,648
- Tins, you do love a raw bar.

384
00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:20,150
- Not as much as I love
an open bar.

385
00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:22,236
- Oh. [chuckles] Wow.

386
00:14:22,319 --> 00:14:23,862
The more the merrier, then.

387
00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:26,699
- Looks like the hood
ornament's driving the car now.

388
00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:29,785
[Lord Kitchener's "The Road"]

389
00:14:29,868 --> 00:14:34,290
♪ ♪

390
00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:36,625
- ♪ I had whole day plannin' ♪

391
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:39,169
♪ All kind of I'm comin' ♪

392
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,880
♪ I had whole day plannin' ♪

393
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:44,133
♪ All kind of I'm comin' ♪

394
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:46,969
♪ They said
there will be people ♪

395
00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:48,637
♪ And they don't care
'bout trouble ♪

396
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,639
♪ But tell them
don't worry with me ♪

397
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:53,392
♪ Is a different thing,
1963 ♪

398
00:14:53,475 --> 00:14:54,768
♪ Because the road... ♪

399
00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,562
- Joyce.

400
00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,402
- Hello, Glenn.
- I, uh--

401
00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:05,154
I-I didn't think you'd be here.

402
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:07,156
- Uh, well, I do still belong,
so...

403
00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:08,991
- Right. Um...

404
00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:11,619
- Glenneth,
where'd you put my wrap?

405
00:15:11,702 --> 00:15:14,163
- Joyce, this is--
this is my friend, Kitty.

406
00:15:14,246 --> 00:15:15,789
- Kitty Lawson.

407
00:15:15,873 --> 00:15:17,708
Oh, my God, of course. Yeah.
I used to--

408
00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:19,001
I used to babysit you.

409
00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:20,586
- When I was eight.

410
00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:22,504
You pierced my ears with
an ice cube and a potato.

411
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:25,466
- That's right.
I did do that for you.

412
00:15:25,549 --> 00:15:27,426
- The holes stretched.
- Oh.

413
00:15:27,509 --> 00:15:29,470
- My lobes are so delicate.

414
00:15:29,553 --> 00:15:31,805
They might as well
be made of gossamer.

415
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:34,391
Emma!
- How are you?

416
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:36,435
We missed you
at the croquet party.

417
00:15:36,518 --> 00:15:38,062
- [sighs] Sorry.

418
00:15:38,145 --> 00:15:39,647
I-I hope this isn't
too awkward for you.

419
00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:40,856
- No. No.

420
00:15:40,939 --> 00:15:43,317
No, it's not awkward
for me at all.

421
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,027
No, um--she needed a new sitter

422
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,196
when I went off to college
anyway, so...

423
00:15:47,279 --> 00:15:48,864
You take care, okay?
Nice to see you.

424
00:15:51,825 --> 00:15:53,702
- I asked for a Grasshopper.

425
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:55,120
- Did you?

426
00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:56,914
- Oh, sorry, Kendra.
It's taken.

427
00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:59,416
This one's taken. Keep moving.

428
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:02,044
Oh, I didn't even know
you owned a dress.

429
00:16:02,127 --> 00:16:04,088
Taken.
- All right, Shelly.

430
00:16:04,171 --> 00:16:05,673
You just need to calm down.

431
00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:07,132
- This is your first
advertising pitch

432
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,884
and I just want it to be
perfect, right?

433
00:16:08,967 --> 00:16:10,386
- Yeah, it will be.

434
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:12,721
- Uh-uh. Can you not see
I'm standing here?

435
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:13,889
Roger.

436
00:16:13,972 --> 00:16:15,474
Eileen, I love that dress.

437
00:16:15,557 --> 00:16:18,644
[Stonehenge's
"King of the Golden Hall"]

438
00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:21,563
♪ ♪

439
00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:22,898
- ♪ Hey ♪

440
00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:27,861
♪ ♪

441
00:16:27,945 --> 00:16:30,906
♪ Three rings
for the Elven kings ♪

442
00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:33,701
♪ Underneath the sky ♪

443
00:16:33,784 --> 00:16:36,995
♪ One for the Dark Lord ♪

444
00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:39,998
♪ On his dark throne ♪

445
00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:41,583
♪ Yeah ♪

446
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:43,419
♪ A missed dream ♪

447
00:16:45,671 --> 00:16:47,256
♪ Gotta stop it now ♪

448
00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:50,217
♪ The burning desire, yeah ♪

449
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:51,885
- Mm. So many shrimp.

450
00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,345
- Ooh, and the big ones, too.

451
00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:55,472
- What are you wearing?

452
00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:57,015
- What? You said
"Dress for the occasion."

453
00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:58,600
- This looks like
the "Rich and Horny" wardrobe.

454
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:00,102
- That's because it is.

455
00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:01,812
- Look, it was either this
or "Victorian Vixens."

456
00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:04,106
- Please excuse my sister's
lack of manners.

457
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:06,191
I think you look just fine.
I'm Shelly.

458
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:08,193
- Oh, hey.
- Hi. Oh--hi.

459
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,279
Hi. Shelly. Shelly.

460
00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:11,864
Shelly.
- Older or younger?

461
00:17:11,947 --> 00:17:13,657
- Someone's
been brought up right.

462
00:17:13,741 --> 00:17:15,242
- Well--
- So, I gotta say, this place

463
00:17:15,325 --> 00:17:16,952
is not as nice
as I thought it would be.

464
00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:18,787
The hedges need pruning.
- Oh, that's 'cause it's June

465
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,622
and the wrens
are still nesting in them.

466
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:22,583
- I have the same problem
at my chateau.

467
00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:23,834
- Okay.
- Okay.

468
00:17:23,917 --> 00:17:25,544
Let's get this show
on the road.

469
00:17:25,627 --> 00:17:27,629
- Oh, good, I have a table
saved all right over here--

470
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:29,256
Oh, the Coopers.

471
00:17:29,339 --> 00:17:30,424
Hey, Dianne.

472
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:33,427
all: L'Chaim.
- Oh.

473
00:17:33,510 --> 00:17:36,221
- Let's introduce you
to Mr. Ross, okay?

474
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:39,141
- Who gives a mare's behind?
They're bunnies.

475
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,393
What are we supposed to do,
test on humans?

476
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:43,061
- A good point as always,
Mr. Ross.

477
00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:44,855
- They're unhinged,
these activists.

478
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:46,732
- What's next, a ban on DDT?

479
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:48,650
[all laugh]
- Gentlemen.

480
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:51,153
I see you put your face on
for the evening.

481
00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:54,072
- Oh, I just wore a little
eyeliner, that's all.

482
00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:59,077
- [laughs]
- [chuckles]

483
00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:01,371
- This must be the famous
Mr. Renetti.

484
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:03,373
- It is. You have a beautiful
club here, sir.

485
00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:04,875
Lovely hedges.

486
00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:06,627
- Yeah, well, they're a bit
unruly this time of year.

487
00:18:06,710 --> 00:18:08,253
The ladies are quite up in arms

488
00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:10,547
about protecting the wrens.
- Oh, those ladies.

489
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:12,299
They have opinions about
everything these days.

490
00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:14,051
- We do.
- They've made my business

491
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:15,427
quite...challenging.

492
00:18:15,511 --> 00:18:16,970
- Oh, I bet.
- We feel we can help you.

493
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:19,014
- You seem to have figured
it out, hm?

494
00:18:19,097 --> 00:18:21,016
60% growth
in the last five years,

495
00:18:21,099 --> 00:18:22,768
4 million circulation.

496
00:18:22,851 --> 00:18:24,144
- You've done your homework,
sir.

497
00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:25,562
- Yeah, he has.

498
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,189
So that is why we believe
that "Minx" can really

499
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,358
help you
because it is a platform--

500
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,026
- Okay. Okay.
Enough of the chit-chat.

501
00:18:31,109 --> 00:18:33,779
But maybe we should get down
to brass tacks.

502
00:18:33,862 --> 00:18:35,197
- Yes, I would love that.

503
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,990
My thoughts exactly.
- Mr. Renetti,

504
00:18:37,074 --> 00:18:38,826
let's adjourn to the lounge.

505
00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:40,202
I hope you're a Cohiba man.

506
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:41,662
- If you got 'em,
I'll smoke 'em.

507
00:18:41,745 --> 00:18:44,248
- [laughs]
- I'll see you later, then.

508
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:49,503
[cheerful music]

509
00:18:49,586 --> 00:18:56,093
♪ ♪

510
00:18:56,176 --> 00:18:59,096
[Doug laughs]

511
00:19:01,974 --> 00:19:04,351
- I mean, baby oil works
great as, like, a base,

512
00:19:04,434 --> 00:19:05,894
but if you wanna be really
brown, you have to

513
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,396
add Crisco and then
spray yourself with Pam.

514
00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:08,856
- Honey, that's how I roast
a ham.

515
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:10,566
[both laugh]

516
00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:12,150
- And here I thought
you were Portuguese.

517
00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:13,777
- No, no, no.
I'm white as heck.

518
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,320
- She's like a ghost really.

519
00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:17,239
You know what,
Bambi is so talented.

520
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:19,366
She can open beer bottles
with her teeth.

521
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:20,993
- Pick up tissues
with ropes of spit.

522
00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:22,536
- Uh-uh.
- Mm-hmm.

523
00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:26,665
- Yup.
- Wow.

524
00:19:26,748 --> 00:19:28,292
- There it is.
- Are they all mouth related?

525
00:19:28,375 --> 00:19:30,085
- Well, my tongue was clipped
when I was two.

526
00:19:30,168 --> 00:19:31,837
- Okay.
- I have a lot of party tricks

527
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:33,755
but not a lot of actual skills.

528
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:35,424
And working with your sister
is so amazing.

529
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:36,967
I mean, she cares about
so many things.

530
00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:38,635
- Yeah.
- I wanna make a difference.

531
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,095
- You'll figure it out.

532
00:19:40,178 --> 00:19:42,222
Eleanor Roosevelt started out
as arm candy too.

533
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:43,390
- To Eleanor!

534
00:19:43,473 --> 00:19:44,766
- Yes!
[laughter]

535
00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:46,727
- Oh, my God.
Your lives seem so fun.

536
00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:49,021
All I do with my mouth is yell.

537
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,776
- Can I interest you
in a twilight swim?

538
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,112
- Uh, I didn't bring my suit.

539
00:19:57,195 --> 00:19:59,573
- You don't need one.

540
00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:13,128
- [laughs] Oh, you're kidding.

541
00:20:13,211 --> 00:20:14,588
Really?
- Yeah.

542
00:20:14,671 --> 00:20:16,048
I gotta hand it to you,
you set a nice hook.

543
00:20:16,131 --> 00:20:17,758
It was a pretty easy reel-in
for me.

544
00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:20,302
- I mean, obviously
I'm no angling enthusiast,

545
00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:22,304
but I think I can get what that
means from context.

546
00:20:22,387 --> 00:20:24,973
- He wants the inside cover
for some fancy skin line

547
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,100
and then a few half-pages for,
I don't know,

548
00:20:27,184 --> 00:20:28,685
some eye-related goo.
But he's in.

549
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:31,438
- It looks like Cadillacs
and caviar are in play.

550
00:20:31,521 --> 00:20:33,482
- [laughs]
- Au revoir, le double dong.

551
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:34,858
Oh, my God.

552
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,401
- One other thing is, uh,

553
00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:39,947
Mr. Ross wants me to toss in
a night with Bambi.

554
00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:44,743
- Uh, you're not suggesting--

555
00:20:44,826 --> 00:20:47,496
- I am. In order to close
the deal,

556
00:20:47,579 --> 00:20:49,289
he wants a night
with Bambi at his--

557
00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:51,625
I guess you could call it his
"fuck pad" at the Ravenswood.

558
00:20:51,708 --> 00:20:53,627
But I will defer to you.

559
00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:57,506
I'll let you decide if those
terms are acceptable.

560
00:20:57,589 --> 00:20:59,841
- Ha ha, very funny.

561
00:21:01,259 --> 00:21:02,886
- This is his address
and the code

562
00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:04,179
to get in the back entrance.

563
00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:05,764
You could try it yourself,

564
00:21:05,847 --> 00:21:07,516
just be prepared
for a handsy old man

565
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:09,434
who probably
only gets semi-hard.

566
00:21:11,979 --> 00:21:17,484
I'm sorry, kid, but this card
is who these people really are.

567
00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:26,576
[mellow acoustic music playing]

568
00:21:26,660 --> 00:21:28,036
♪ ♪

569
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:30,163
- This isn't music.

570
00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:32,749
No,
"The Great American Songbook,"

571
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:34,835
now, that is music.

572
00:21:34,918 --> 00:21:38,005
No, poetry.

573
00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:42,050
♪ Night and day,
you are the one ♪

574
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:44,886
♪ Only you beneath the moon ♪

575
00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:46,888
♪ And under the sun ♪

576
00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:48,724
- Hope I'm not interrupting.

577
00:21:48,807 --> 00:21:50,726
- Cole Porter
is who you're interrupting.

578
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:52,728
- I hear we're going to be
in business.

579
00:21:52,811 --> 00:21:54,563
- You heard right, young lady.

580
00:21:54,646 --> 00:21:57,566
Your partner, Mr. Renetti, got
a good head on his shoulders.

581
00:21:57,649 --> 00:22:00,944
- So is this the address we
should use for your contract?

582
00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:07,576
All my life,
you've lorded over this club.

583
00:22:07,659 --> 00:22:11,079
And I have had to listen to
your toasts and your agendas

584
00:22:11,163 --> 00:22:14,249
and your archaic rules
about dressing modestly

585
00:22:14,332 --> 00:22:15,625
and acting with decorum.

586
00:22:15,709 --> 00:22:17,294
- I don't know
what you're insinuating,

587
00:22:17,377 --> 00:22:19,671
but clearly, you have misread
the situation.

588
00:22:19,755 --> 00:22:21,506
- Oh, so you're not
a vile misogynist

589
00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:24,593
who makes a deal
to have a human being

590
00:22:24,676 --> 00:22:26,094
delivered to his bed?

591
00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:28,180
[music and conversation stops]

592
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,309
- It's all right, everyone.

593
00:22:32,392 --> 00:22:35,395
It's just Miss Prigger
in one of her tizzies.

594
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,105
- [laughs] Yeah. Yeah.

595
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:40,817
And that was just Mr. Ross'
hand on my ass

596
00:22:40,901 --> 00:22:44,821
when I was 12 years old and won
the Juniors Tennis Tournament.

597
00:22:44,905 --> 00:22:48,283
You wanna know why I'm never
on the courts anymore?

598
00:22:48,366 --> 00:22:51,203
It's because that ass grab
made me quit.

599
00:22:55,707 --> 00:22:58,627
Oh, none of you are gonna
say anything?

600
00:22:58,710 --> 00:23:01,797
- You are an embarrassment.

601
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:05,467
It's a good thing your father
didn't live to see this day.

602
00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:08,345
Ooh--
[crowd gasps]

603
00:23:09,763 --> 00:23:11,473
[grunting]

604
00:23:11,556 --> 00:23:13,809
- Oh, my God. Oh, God.

605
00:23:13,892 --> 00:23:17,729
[crowd mutters]

606
00:23:17,813 --> 00:23:19,189
Uh...

607
00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:22,192
- [clears throat]

608
00:23:22,275 --> 00:23:24,444
- [gasping, grunting]

609
00:23:26,571 --> 00:23:28,615
[spits]
[crowd gasps]

610
00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:32,119
[Mr. Ross gasping]

611
00:23:32,202 --> 00:23:33,912
- You're fine.

612
00:23:36,832 --> 00:23:39,501
[light acoustic music]

613
00:23:39,584 --> 00:23:42,170
[radio chatter]

614
00:23:42,254 --> 00:23:45,006
God, I've wanted to
do that for years.

615
00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:47,467
- I didn't even know you could
break three ribs at once.

616
00:23:47,551 --> 00:23:48,760
- Doug told me what he said,

617
00:23:48,844 --> 00:23:50,470
so I gave it
a little extra oomph.

618
00:23:50,554 --> 00:23:52,889
- So a new talent.
- Ooh.

619
00:23:52,973 --> 00:23:54,516
- Jesus, Prigger.

620
00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:57,144
Who knew you could throw
a punch?

621
00:23:57,227 --> 00:23:59,688
- I can never come back
to this place.

622
00:23:59,771 --> 00:24:02,732
And I think
I'm fine with that.

623
00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:05,777
- Hey, Joyce, when I, uh--

624
00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:08,613
when I met that man and
realized that he might actually

625
00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:12,242
advertise in our magazine,
I'm not gonna lie to you, kid,

626
00:24:12,325 --> 00:24:13,910
I got--

627
00:24:13,994 --> 00:24:15,745
I got really excited.

628
00:24:16,788 --> 00:24:18,123
- Yeah.

629
00:24:18,206 --> 00:24:20,542
- I mean, what,
you don't think I want to, uh,

630
00:24:20,625 --> 00:24:22,294
I don't know,
be in business with people

631
00:24:22,377 --> 00:24:24,546
who've got real money?
[laughs]

632
00:24:24,629 --> 00:24:27,382
Chum it up at The Palm
on somebody else's dime?

633
00:24:27,465 --> 00:24:29,176
- Yeah, that's not--

634
00:24:29,259 --> 00:24:30,886
that's not where we are,
though.

635
00:24:30,969 --> 00:24:33,763
- No, but I believe we will be.

636
00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:37,100
You and me together
on our terms.

637
00:24:37,184 --> 00:24:38,435
- I like the sound of that.

638
00:24:38,518 --> 00:24:40,061
- Good.

639
00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:42,063
'Cause I need you to do
something for me.

640
00:24:42,147 --> 00:24:43,940
- Oh, God.

641
00:24:44,024 --> 00:24:46,985
- There's so many textures
and sizes.

642
00:24:47,068 --> 00:24:49,070
Oh, this one has
a very realistic vein.

643
00:24:49,154 --> 00:24:52,115
- Oh, I got an idea.
How about, "Dildos.

644
00:24:52,199 --> 00:24:54,451
When every other advertiser
says no."

645
00:24:55,744 --> 00:24:58,288
- Can I ask a crazy question?

646
00:24:58,371 --> 00:25:02,584
Is it really so bad to let
women know about sex toys?

647
00:25:02,667 --> 00:25:04,544
- What woman wants a sex toy?

648
00:25:04,628 --> 00:25:06,296
I don't know anyone
who uses them.

649
00:25:07,297 --> 00:25:09,466
- Uh, yes you do.
- Oh?

650
00:25:12,510 --> 00:25:14,721
Oh.
- Yeah, it's the only way I

651
00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:18,934
can, um...get to the end,
per se.

652
00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:21,061
- So not with Lenny?

653
00:25:21,144 --> 00:25:23,146
No, I mean, sex feels nice,
but I just--

654
00:25:23,230 --> 00:25:26,149
I need something to push me
over the edge.

655
00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:28,193
For a long time,
I thought there was

656
00:25:28,276 --> 00:25:29,611
something wrong with me.

657
00:25:29,694 --> 00:25:33,114
If I'd been aware of these,
um...helpers,

658
00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:35,033
you know,
when I was first married,

659
00:25:35,116 --> 00:25:37,118
it might have saved me
a lot of tears

660
00:25:37,202 --> 00:25:40,789
and a scary trip downtown
with a wig and glasses.

661
00:25:42,249 --> 00:25:43,667
- I had no idea.

662
00:25:43,750 --> 00:25:45,961
- Yeah, well, we don't talk
about this kind of stuff.

663
00:25:46,044 --> 00:25:48,380
- Well, maybe we should.

664
00:25:48,463 --> 00:25:49,965
- Yeah. Okay.

665
00:25:50,048 --> 00:25:52,133
Uh, what's your favorite way
to masturbate?

666
00:25:52,217 --> 00:25:53,802
- Oh, my God, no.
[laughs]

667
00:25:53,885 --> 00:25:55,303
- Excuse me, Miss.

668
00:25:55,387 --> 00:25:57,639
I just told you some
very personal things.

669
00:25:57,722 --> 00:25:59,599
Things only my hairdresser
knows.

670
00:25:59,683 --> 00:26:01,101
- [laughs] No.

671
00:26:01,184 --> 00:26:03,311
I d--I don't do it,
anyway, so--

672
00:26:03,395 --> 00:26:04,813
Not really.
So it's just, you know--

673
00:26:04,896 --> 00:26:06,815
It makes me feel, um...

674
00:26:06,898 --> 00:26:08,358
Ugh. It's dumb.

675
00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:10,151
- So the only way
you can get pleasure

676
00:26:10,235 --> 00:26:11,778
is when you're with a man?

677
00:26:11,861 --> 00:26:13,780
That's not very feminist,
Joycie.

678
00:26:13,863 --> 00:26:15,657
I mean, what would
Gloria Steinem say?

679
00:26:15,740 --> 00:26:17,075
- I hope if I ever meet
Gloria Steinem,

680
00:26:17,158 --> 00:26:18,702
we are not talking about
masturbating.

681
00:26:18,785 --> 00:26:20,412
- And I very much hope
that you are.

682
00:26:20,495 --> 00:26:22,747
She probably has a few tricks
up her sleeve,

683
00:26:22,831 --> 00:26:23,999
you know?
- [laughs]

684
00:26:24,082 --> 00:26:25,208
- All right,
I'll see you later.

685
00:26:25,292 --> 00:26:28,461
Use this one. Level 4. Okay?

686
00:26:38,763 --> 00:26:42,600
[mellow pop/rock]

687
00:26:42,684 --> 00:26:48,898
♪ ♪

688
00:26:56,114 --> 00:27:01,494
♪ I found it very hard
to realize ♪

689
00:27:01,578 --> 00:27:04,414
♪ ♪

690
00:27:04,497 --> 00:27:06,708
♪ That you ♪

691
00:27:06,791 --> 00:27:10,628
♪ Stole the love inside
from my eyes ♪

692
00:27:10,712 --> 00:27:14,257
♪ ♪

693
00:27:14,341 --> 00:27:17,260
[vibrator buzzes]

694
00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:24,184
♪ ♪

695
00:27:24,267 --> 00:27:25,643
- Ahh.

696
00:27:25,727 --> 00:27:27,562
Ahh!

697
00:27:27,645 --> 00:27:30,106
[moans, laughs]

698
00:27:30,190 --> 00:27:32,192
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

699
00:27:32,275 --> 00:27:34,944
[moaning]
Holy moly!

700
00:27:35,028 --> 00:27:39,157
- ♪ With everything
that you do ♪

701
00:27:40,784 --> 00:27:46,414
♪ To me, I coulda been
a stray for you ♪

702
00:27:49,542 --> 00:27:53,838
♪ You turn me upside down ♪

703
00:27:53,922 --> 00:27:58,301
♪ You treated me
like a clown ♪

704
00:27:58,385 --> 00:28:04,307
♪ I, I didn't read the play
between the lines ♪

705
00:28:04,391 --> 00:28:08,728
♪ I acted out the part
you had in mind ♪

706
00:28:10,730 --> 00:28:17,112
♪ For me, I play the part
you want so very well ♪

707
00:28:17,195 --> 00:28:21,074
♪ 'Cause I'm the only one
I couldn't tell ♪

708
00:28:21,157 --> 00:28:27,622
♪ That playing off
was what you do so well ♪

709
00:28:27,705 --> 00:28:34,796
♪ ♪

710
00:28:57,694 --> 00:29:03,825
♪ You, you took me in,
I didn't realize ♪

711
00:29:03,908 --> 00:29:07,829
♪ Pulling me to you
is no surprise ♪

712
00:29:07,912 --> 00:29:14,335
♪ 'Cause everything
you told me was a lie ♪

