1
00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:06,589
[shutter clicks]

2
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:08,591
- Um...

3
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:10,468
could you repeat the question?

4
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:13,054
I only understood
the word "the."

5
00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:14,889
- Sure.
"In Nixon's America,

6
00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:16,224
"would you say gender equity

7
00:00:16,307 --> 00:00:18,351
is about more
than just equal pay?"

8
00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:20,645
And the word "the" is not
in that question.

9
00:00:22,897 --> 00:00:25,233
- All right, let's just skip
to the next one.

10
00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,611
- Um, okay, my turn.

11
00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:31,239
"As the Soviet Union
and the collectivist East

12
00:00:31,322 --> 00:00:33,366
turn towards radical egalita"--

13
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:35,118
- Tarianism.
Radical egalitarianism.

14
00:00:35,201 --> 00:00:36,703
- "Radical egalitarianism,

15
00:00:36,786 --> 00:00:40,165
what role do Western
democracies have in"--

16
00:00:40,248 --> 00:00:42,459
You know what? I don't think
you're gonna get this question.

17
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:44,335
- I don't see a world
where we don't.

18
00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:47,380
Abolishing gender distinctions
is squarely in the zeitgeist.

19
00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:50,717
- We'll be lucky if any
journalists show up to this,

20
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,302
let alone the smart ones.

21
00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:54,262
Bambi's right.
Stick to the basics.

22
00:00:54,345 --> 00:00:56,264
- Hey, this question
is mostly in Latin.

23
00:00:56,347 --> 00:00:57,515
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, I know Pig Latin.

24
00:00:57,599 --> 00:00:58,975
- Hey, what are your turn-ons?

25
00:00:59,058 --> 00:01:00,226
- Oh, and a follow-up,
turn-offs.

26
00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:01,478
- What's your sign, honey?

27
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:02,520
- Ooh, I was gonna ask that.

28
00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:03,730
- First question--

29
00:01:03,813 --> 00:01:04,814
I like it
when girls dress sexy.

30
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:05,940
- Oh, my God.

31
00:01:06,024 --> 00:01:07,150
- I don't like it
when they don't.

32
00:01:07,233 --> 00:01:08,651
- Wrong.
- How could it be wrong?

33
00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:10,653
It's an opinion.
And I'm with you, buddy.

34
00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:12,071
- You guys talk too fast.

35
00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:13,490
Is this what the conference
is gonna be like?

36
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:14,824
- Yes, definitely.
- Not a chance.

37
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:15,825
- Yes, it will.

38
00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:18,828
[funky music]

39
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,705
♪ ♪

40
00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:22,999
- ♪ Oh! ♪

41
00:01:23,082 --> 00:01:26,169
- That man,
that beautiful jar of nothing

42
00:01:26,252 --> 00:01:27,337
cannot represent

43
00:01:27,420 --> 00:01:29,255
the premiere issue
of our magazine.

44
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:30,548
- He's on the cover.

45
00:01:30,632 --> 00:01:32,383
He's representing
the fuck out of it.

46
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:35,386
No one would be interested
if it's just you up there,

47
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:36,638
charming as you may be.

48
00:01:36,721 --> 00:01:37,680
- This is our only chance

49
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,140
to make a first impression.

50
00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:41,601
We are introducing
something completely new.

51
00:01:41,684 --> 00:01:43,144
We have to get this right.

52
00:01:43,228 --> 00:01:45,271
- You may be the brains,
but he's the face,

53
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:48,358
and there's a reason they call
the face "the moneymaker."

54
00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:50,109
It's what makes the money.

55
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:51,778
- Yes, I get it.

56
00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:56,074
♪ ♪

57
00:01:56,157 --> 00:01:58,868
He doesn't understand
rudimentary hand signals.

58
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,245
Gorillas catch on faster.

59
00:02:00,328 --> 00:02:01,412
- You got a couple of days.

60
00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,872
Train him up as best you can

61
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:06,876
and, I don't know,
maybe lose the 'tude.

62
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,253
- "Lose the 'tude."

63
00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:10,004
- Got a call from City Hall
this morning.

64
00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:11,965
Enjoy your little badge gag
on the councilwoman?

65
00:02:12,048 --> 00:02:13,424
Troop 69?

66
00:02:13,508 --> 00:02:15,593
- Yeah, Art Department
knocked it out of the park.

67
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:18,221
- Well, now we're being audited
by the county tax assessor.

68
00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:19,973
Couldn't leave it alone,
could you?

69
00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:22,725
- You know, Westbury should
really give me a badge.

70
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:24,310
Teaching our bright young minds

71
00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:27,689
that there's more than one way
to eat a cookie.

72
00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:29,065
- Doug.
- Hey, did you hear

73
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:30,692
Scotty gave notice
down the block?

74
00:02:30,775 --> 00:02:33,152
I bet we could swoop in,
make an offer,

75
00:02:33,236 --> 00:02:35,947
and nab that building
before they even hire a broker.

76
00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:37,615
- We don't have the cash.
- We will.

77
00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:38,992
- We are bleeding money.

78
00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:40,910
- You gotta spend money
to make money.

79
00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:42,912
- You gotta have money
to spend money.

80
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,539
- Says who?

81
00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:46,749
Don't worry about the audit.
Our books are good.

82
00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:48,376
Gerry will handle it.

83
00:02:49,502 --> 00:02:52,213
Hey, lose the sweater.
Throw this over your shoulder.

84
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:58,511
- "An exciting new chapter
in the annals of erotica."

85
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,430
- Annal is Tompkins'
favorite kind of erotica.

86
00:03:00,513 --> 00:03:01,723
[laughter]

87
00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:05,518
- "Who says feminism
can't be sexy?"

88
00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:07,103
This is gold.

89
00:03:07,186 --> 00:03:08,938
We gotta send someone
to cover this press conference.

90
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,565
- Is "female gaze"
just another way

91
00:03:10,648 --> 00:03:11,774
of saying carpet munchers?

92
00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:12,942
[laughter]

93
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,903
- See?
This stuff writes itself.

94
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:16,487
Anyone up
for a fish-in-a-barrel gig?

95
00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:18,740
600 words.

96
00:03:18,823 --> 00:03:20,033
- I'll take this one.

97
00:03:20,116 --> 00:03:21,951
- Glenn.

98
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:24,412
all: Glenn, Glenn,
Glenn, Glenn,

99
00:03:24,495 --> 00:03:27,874
Glenn, Glenn, Glenn,
Glenn, Glenn, Glenn.

100
00:03:29,918 --> 00:03:31,461
- Okay. Let's review.

101
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:33,171
Feminism is?

102
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:35,882
- Good.
- And?

103
00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:37,342
- Started with witches.

104
00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:38,885
- No. that one's on me.

105
00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:40,970
I should not have opened
with the Salem witch trials.

106
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:44,432
Okay, let's get back on course
in the struggle for...

107
00:03:44,515 --> 00:03:47,143
- Elizabeth Cady Stanton.

108
00:03:47,226 --> 00:03:48,353
- Was one of the names

109
00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:50,021
that I mentioned
in the introduction.

110
00:03:50,104 --> 00:03:52,774
- My mom almost named me Cody.
- Oh.

111
00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,692
- But she didn't
'cause our last name.

112
00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,778
She said that people
wouldn't take me seriously

113
00:03:56,861 --> 00:03:58,154
if my name was Cody Brody.

114
00:03:58,237 --> 00:04:00,114
- Well, she sounds
like a smart woman.

115
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,408
Would you call her a feminist?
- Not to her face.

116
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,661
- Come on.
It's not a bad word.

117
00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,537
Feminism is about equality.

118
00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,748
It's about giving people power
and a voice,

119
00:04:08,831 --> 00:04:10,583
even if they are
some pretty little thing

120
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:13,169
that hasn't been taught
to use theirs yet.

121
00:04:13,252 --> 00:04:16,631
- Okay.
Sorry. Jeez.

122
00:04:16,714 --> 00:04:19,926
Now I understand why
women have so much suffrage.

123
00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:23,596
- All right, um...

124
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,348
how about we have a drink?
- Sure.

125
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:27,016
- Okay.
- Got any beer?

126
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,353
- No, I do not.
I have a lovely Pouilly-Fuissé.

127
00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:32,313
Trust me.

128
00:04:39,904 --> 00:04:40,989
- Hmm.

129
00:04:41,072 --> 00:04:43,199
[soft music playing]

130
00:04:43,282 --> 00:04:44,617
Shouldn't you be bowling?

131
00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:46,119
- I should.

132
00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:48,621
I'm taking a look at Gerry's...

133
00:04:48,705 --> 00:04:50,832
I'm not sure what to call this.
Work?

134
00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:53,376
- Now, go easy on Gerry.
He's a real accountant.

135
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:55,378
I poached him from Capitol.

136
00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:56,629
He's the one that figured out

137
00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,881
how to write off
Phil Spector's guns.

138
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:01,634
- This is a mess, and I don't
even have an accounting degree.

139
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:03,594
- Well, I don't even have
a high-school diploma,

140
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:05,805
yet here we are.

141
00:05:05,888 --> 00:05:09,350
To, uh, punching
above our weight.

142
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:12,395
Cheers.

143
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,814
- You do run
a successful business.

144
00:05:14,897 --> 00:05:17,233
- Thank you.
- Sloppily.

145
00:05:17,316 --> 00:05:19,235
Half your employees
have criminal records.

146
00:05:19,318 --> 00:05:20,987
The other half
are lucky they don't.

147
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:22,405
You're spending money
you don't have

148
00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:23,740
on things you don't need.

149
00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:24,991
- Subjective.

150
00:05:25,074 --> 00:05:26,617
Come on. Hold on now.

151
00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:31,414
Look at what--
look at what Frank sent over.

152
00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:33,249
- The Tower That Titty Built.

153
00:05:33,332 --> 00:05:36,461
- Don't forget our new friend,
good old cock and balls.

154
00:05:36,544 --> 00:05:38,546
You're telling me
you wouldn't want to show up

155
00:05:38,629 --> 00:05:40,089
to work here every day?

156
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,885
Come on, Tins, our plan.
This plan.

157
00:05:43,968 --> 00:05:48,306
Big circulation,
big advertisers, big money.

158
00:05:48,389 --> 00:05:50,099
The same plan
that we came up with

159
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:52,393
in the back of that '64 Impala,

160
00:05:52,477 --> 00:05:54,270
talking out of our asses,

161
00:05:54,353 --> 00:05:57,940
is as alive now
as it has ever been.

162
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,400
- Yeah?

163
00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:01,611
- Yeah.

164
00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:04,113
- You're on top of it?

165
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:06,365
- Like a duck on a June bug.

166
00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:10,578
- Then you must know 50 grand
is missing from these books.

167
00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,668
- No, I didn't.
- Hmm.

168
00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:19,670
You didn't know that.

169
00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:21,964
- Well, now I do.

170
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:24,342
- So the patri-archie
forces men

171
00:06:24,425 --> 00:06:26,177
into roles
they don't want to play either.

172
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,471
- [British accent]
By George, I think he's got it.

173
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,556
- It's Shane.
[both laugh]

174
00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:31,849
- [normal voice]
Yeah.

175
00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:33,601
- But you're a good teacher.

176
00:06:33,684 --> 00:06:35,311
- Thank you.

177
00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:37,480
- Most of the girls--

178
00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:40,316
women I meet aren't interested

179
00:06:40,399 --> 00:06:41,901
in what I have to talk about.

180
00:06:41,984 --> 00:06:46,906
- Well, I can tell that
you're a very sensitive man.

181
00:06:46,989 --> 00:06:50,243
- I mean, I know firemen
are supposed to be tough,

182
00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:52,745
and, like, I'm not afraid
of fire or anything.

183
00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:54,205
- Probably should be.

184
00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:56,833
- But sometimes
the other guys,

185
00:06:56,916 --> 00:07:00,586
they can just be so...mean.

186
00:07:00,670 --> 00:07:02,755
- Aww.

187
00:07:02,839 --> 00:07:05,842
- Like, one time,
I rescued this cat

188
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:08,094
from a burning building.

189
00:07:08,177 --> 00:07:10,513
I rushed outside,
but it wasn't breathing.

190
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:14,517
So I gave it mouth-to-mouth,
which totally works on animals.

191
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:18,187
- I would never have thought
to do that.

192
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:19,856
- But that night
in the showers,

193
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:23,943
the other guys, they just kept
meowing and meowing.

194
00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:25,194
- Oh.

195
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,530
- I ran and hid
in engine number nine.

196
00:07:27,613 --> 00:07:29,490
- Those men, they're not tough.

197
00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:32,910
They're just scared,
scared of being vulnerable.

198
00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:35,872
Now, I can tell you that
if women were firefighters,

199
00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:37,832
then no one would ridicule you

200
00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:40,376
for saving
a helpless little kitty cat.

201
00:07:40,459 --> 00:07:42,253
- Too bad
women can't be firemen.

202
00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:43,462
- Says who?

203
00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:48,092
- Well, it's right there
in the name.

204
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:50,720
Fireman.
- Okay. [chuckles]

205
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,848
- Oh, but also, you have to be
able to carry 190 pounds.

206
00:07:53,931 --> 00:07:56,767
- Oh, really?
Is that a lot?

207
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,815
- You're looking at a buck-90.

208
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,526
- Huh? Yeah.

209
00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:08,237
Well, okay.
May I?

210
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,239
- Mm-hmm.
[both laugh]

211
00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:13,534
- Oh, my God. No.
[both laugh]

212
00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:14,702
Hold on.

213
00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:16,078
I'm sure if I just, you know--

214
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:17,830
I had the proper training
and everything,

215
00:08:17,914 --> 00:08:20,583
then, you know...

216
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:21,876
Hmm.

217
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:24,253
- Am I allowed to say
you're pretty?

218
00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:28,216
- Well, I wouldn't accuse you
of objectifying me if you did.

219
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,182
Hmm.

220
00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:37,266
Let me just--

221
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:38,267
[King Floyd's "Groove Me"]

222
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:39,894
- ♪ Uh, aww ♪

223
00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:42,438
♪ Sookie, sookie now ♪
- Oh, my God.

224
00:08:42,521 --> 00:08:44,482
- ♪ Hey, ow, uh ♪

225
00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:46,943
- [laughs]

226
00:08:47,026 --> 00:08:48,861
- Now, in a real fire,
I'd be carrying you

227
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:52,281
out of the building
and not into the bedroom.

228
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:56,118
- Lucky for us, the only thing
on fire is our libidos.

229
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,620
No, no, no.
It's okay.

230
00:08:57,703 --> 00:09:00,623
It's just a fancy way
of saying that you're--

231
00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:04,502
that I--I am--I am
very excited about this.

232
00:09:04,585 --> 00:09:08,130
- ♪ A sweet taste
in my mouth ♪

233
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:12,760
- Um, and this is not something
I ever normally...

234
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:15,638
Wow. Do.

235
00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:16,931
Oh, my God.

236
00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:18,474
- ♪ Happily, nah-nah ♪

237
00:09:18,557 --> 00:09:21,769
♪ In a great big
ol' roomy house ♪

238
00:09:21,852 --> 00:09:23,604
♪ And I know you're gonna ♪

239
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,606
♪ Groove me, baby ♪

240
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:29,568
- But, you know, I guess...
why not?

241
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:31,529
- ♪ Make me feel
good inside ♪

242
00:09:31,612 --> 00:09:36,033
♪ Come on,
and groove me, baby ♪

243
00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:39,203
♪ I need you to groove me ♪

244
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,081
♪ Oh, yeah,
now, now, darling ♪

245
00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:45,251
♪ Uh, come on, come on ♪

246
00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:47,003
♪ Hey! Uh! ♪

247
00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:49,338
♪ Hey, there, sugar darlin' ♪

248
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,090
♪ Come on, give me something ♪

249
00:09:51,173 --> 00:09:52,633
♪ Girl... ♪

250
00:09:52,717 --> 00:09:55,511
- [whispering] I just want
to make you feel good.

251
00:09:55,594 --> 00:09:56,929
- You do?

252
00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:58,514
- ♪ Yes, I'm good,
good loving ♪

253
00:09:58,597 --> 00:10:00,057
♪ With plenty,
plenty hugging ♪

254
00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:01,517
- Okay.

255
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,978
- ♪ You make me feel
good inside ♪

256
00:10:04,061 --> 00:10:08,691
♪ Come on,
and groove me, baby ♪

257
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:11,527
♪ Move me, baby ♪

258
00:10:11,610 --> 00:10:14,280
♪ Oh, sock it to me, mama ♪

259
00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:16,365
♪ Uh! ♪

260
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:19,535
[birds chirping]

261
00:10:31,088 --> 00:10:32,882
[phone rings]

262
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:34,050
- Hello?

263
00:10:34,133 --> 00:10:35,217
- Hey, honey.
- Hello.

264
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:36,552
- Just calling to remind you

265
00:10:36,635 --> 00:10:38,054
about the editor's photo
today.

266
00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:39,221
You have the clothes
picked out?

267
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:40,639
- I surely do.

268
00:10:40,723 --> 00:10:42,767
- Ooh, someone's chirpy
this a.m.

269
00:10:42,850 --> 00:10:45,519
- Someone had a very fun night.

270
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,731
- Oh, my--did someone have--
- Yes! Yes.

271
00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:52,568
And not even in the confines
of a committed partnership.

272
00:10:52,651 --> 00:10:54,320
I had a one-night stand.

273
00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,738
- No!
- Yes.

274
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:57,031
- Well, check that
off your list.

275
00:10:57,114 --> 00:10:58,532
- How do you know
about my list?

276
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:00,076
- Girls like you
always have a list.

277
00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:03,496
- Oh.
Well, it was transcendent.

278
00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:05,289
I don't know what came over me.

279
00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:08,376
And then--and then,
like he read my mind,

280
00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:11,087
he was just gone.

281
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:13,673
- Guess who brought croy-sants.

282
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:19,345
It's French for pastry.

283
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:23,766
- [whispering]
I have to go.

284
00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:25,643
[funky music]

285
00:11:25,726 --> 00:11:28,396
[bell clanging]
- [laughs]

286
00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:30,106
- The bell tolls for thee.

287
00:11:30,189 --> 00:11:31,565
- You told everyone?

288
00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:33,734
- Does this look like
a place of discretion?

289
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:36,028
- Oh, come on.
Don't cheapen it.

290
00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:37,613
'Cause I already did!

291
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,448
[laughter]

292
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:40,741
- So who's the lucky guy?

293
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:42,118
- A lady never--
- Uh-uh, spill.

294
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:43,452
- Yeah, we want details.

295
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,955
- Wait, it was Shane.

296
00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:47,456
- No.
- Yes.

297
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,708
You had training last night.
- It just happened.

298
00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,043
You know, a few verres de vin.

299
00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:52,711
- I so called it.
- Mm, look at you.

300
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:54,797
Using your powerful position
in publishing

301
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:55,881
to score some tail.

302
00:11:55,965 --> 00:11:57,967
- Ooh, baby.

303
00:11:58,050 --> 00:11:59,301
Someone's playing with fire.

304
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,137
- You all told me to do it!

305
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:03,472
- Before we hired him, Joyce.

306
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:04,807
So unprofessional.

307
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:06,559
- Don't listen to him.
You deserve it.

308
00:12:06,642 --> 00:12:08,978
- Mm, three of my five
current stalkers

309
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:10,521
were former employers.

310
00:12:10,604 --> 00:12:12,148
- No, it's not like that.

311
00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:13,941
- You were the one worried
about the press conference,

312
00:12:14,024 --> 00:12:15,484
and now you've gone
and given this boy

313
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:16,944
something else to think about.

314
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:18,988
- That narrative may fit
your tawdry affairs,

315
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:20,197
but I can assure you

316
00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:23,409
that my eye
is squarely on the ball.

317
00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:25,244
- Which one?
This one or this one?

318
00:12:25,327 --> 00:12:27,121
[laughter]

319
00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:33,794
- I'm gonna have to go back
and do some forensics here.

320
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,171
I mean, the receipts I get

321
00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:37,089
are on scraps of paper,
matchbooks,

322
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:38,591
toilet tissue sometimes.

323
00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:42,011
It's a frigging miracle
I get us in the ballpark.

324
00:12:42,094 --> 00:12:44,305
- You can take my word,
those numbers don't add up.

325
00:12:44,388 --> 00:12:47,308
- And it's a very big ballpark.
- Is that my handwriting?

326
00:12:49,935 --> 00:12:52,313
You know what?
These are my wife's glasses.

327
00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:56,775
- That'll be all, Gerry.

328
00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:01,906
[energetic rock music]

329
00:13:01,989 --> 00:13:03,324
I mean, he's not a crook.

330
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:06,535
- Just a terrible accountant.
- Agreed.

331
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,496
Why don't we round up
the troops?

332
00:13:08,579 --> 00:13:10,289
Somebody's gotta
know something.

333
00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:12,500
- You might as well come clean
because we already know.

334
00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:14,376
- About the copy machine
we fenced?

335
00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:18,047
- Sure, I pawned the cameras,
but I bought better ones,

336
00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:20,382
and I also made rent,
so win-win.

337
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,426
- [crying]

338
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:26,263
♪ ♪

339
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,933
- ♪ Girl, there's a big,
big world out there ♪

340
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:31,894
- Between the fall of 1970
and the spring of 1971,

341
00:13:31,977 --> 00:13:34,146
yeah, technically,
I did live here.

342
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:35,731
But that's just 'cause
I was hiding

343
00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:37,066
from the Lambs of God.

344
00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:44,740
- Oh, those are mine.

345
00:13:44,823 --> 00:13:46,492
New Pinto.

346
00:13:46,575 --> 00:13:48,786
Bought with money
from a dead aunt

347
00:13:48,869 --> 00:13:52,248
who died of natural causes.

348
00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:53,624
[whistles casually]

349
00:13:56,460 --> 00:13:59,380
- Did she kill her aunt?
- Yes.

350
00:13:59,463 --> 00:14:01,257
This is what happens
when you hire people

351
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:04,051
2:00 a.m. drunk on a Wednesday
because they beat you at darts.

352
00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:06,303
- Kenny was the best
copy editor we've ever had.

353
00:14:06,387 --> 00:14:08,430
I'll defend that hire
till the day I die.

354
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:10,599
- Real businesses
don't operate this way.

355
00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:11,892
- All right.
So what do you want me to do?

356
00:14:11,976 --> 00:14:14,270
Fire everyone?
Just clean house?

357
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,940
- No, but we gotta
start somewhere.

358
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:20,526
- Fine.

359
00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:22,027
We'll fire Gerry.

360
00:14:26,407 --> 00:14:30,160
- I'm glad we're doing this.
- Thank you.

361
00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:31,287
Me too.

362
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:34,290
Um, tomorrow is the big day,

363
00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:36,709
and I just wanted to make sure

364
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:40,087
that we're both understanding
what this is.

365
00:14:40,170 --> 00:14:43,132
- Looks like fried squid to me.
- Yes. Yeah.

366
00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:45,050
That is the food
that we ordered.

367
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:48,178
But on a deeper level...

368
00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:51,682
there are power dynamics
in our relationship.

369
00:14:51,765 --> 00:14:54,310
- I love when you say
smart things.

370
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:58,522
- And, uh, those dynamics make
issues of consent complicated.

371
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:01,275
- Wait, am I in trouble?
- No, no, no, not at all.

372
00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:03,652
It's just, um...

373
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:04,820
last night was fun.

374
00:15:04,903 --> 00:15:05,946
- Very fun.

375
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,449
- But it was just fun.

376
00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:11,368
- Yes. I understand
what you're saying.

377
00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:12,745
It was just fun.

378
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:14,747
- Right. Yes.
Oh, God, good.

379
00:15:14,830 --> 00:15:16,165
Okay.
'Cause we're working together.

380
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,000
No one says
you can't have some fun

381
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:21,211
while you're working together,
but we both know what this is.

382
00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:22,880
- I am so glad
you said something,

383
00:15:22,963 --> 00:15:25,132
because it was on my mind too.

384
00:15:25,215 --> 00:15:26,759
- Oh.

385
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:34,224
[both moaning]

386
00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:37,353
- I don't even use these
to go to the bathroom.

387
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:38,646
- Where do you go?

388
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,439
- What?
No, I use bathrooms.

389
00:15:40,522 --> 00:15:43,817
I just don't go in public.
Oh, my God, just keep--

390
00:15:43,901 --> 00:15:46,820
[funky music]

391
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:52,701
♪ ♪

392
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:55,579
- I should have debuted
the classier logo.

393
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:57,956
- Hello, Norman.

394
00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,750
- 20 Bottom Dollar titles
in a decade,

395
00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:02,378
and this is the one
that gets a fancy lunch.

396
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:03,962
[chuckles]
Look at you.

397
00:16:04,046 --> 00:16:06,090
William Randolph Hearst reborn.

398
00:16:06,173 --> 00:16:07,716
- You know this one's
full of dongs

399
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,218
and lady opinions, right?

400
00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:10,928
- "The Valley Porn Courier"
covers all things

401
00:16:11,011 --> 00:16:12,846
Bottom Dollar,
not just what I find appealing.

402
00:16:12,930 --> 00:16:14,807
That's a promise I made
to my readers.

403
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:17,351
- Norman.
- Your number-one fan.

404
00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:18,686
- Hey.

405
00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:20,145
Let me show you
to your VIP seat.

406
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:22,690
- Of course.
- We knew he would show up.

407
00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:27,569
What about everyone else?
- Yeah, it's a--it's a turnout.

408
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:29,446
- Voilà.
- I like it.

409
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:30,864
- You do?
- I do.

410
00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:33,659
- We are packed
to the gills out there.

411
00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:35,202
Ah, you screwed him again.

412
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:36,954
- Boorish and inappropriate.

413
00:16:37,037 --> 00:16:39,748
And accurate.
[both laugh]

414
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,126
It's fine. It's fine.
It's under control.

415
00:16:42,209 --> 00:16:44,044
- Good.

416
00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:46,088
- You okay?
- Yeah. I'm fine.

417
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:49,883
It's just, um,
there's actually people here.

418
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:53,053
- Yeah, because our magazine
is a jolt of something new.

419
00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:55,222
It's a whisper and a scream.

420
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:58,684
- I guess it is.
Just, uh, don't blow it, okay?

421
00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:02,104
- Okay.
- Just ignore him.

422
00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:03,981
I support your sexploits.

423
00:17:04,064 --> 00:17:05,774
You should've been doing this
a lot sooner.

424
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:07,109
- I know.
- Mm-hmm.

425
00:17:07,192 --> 00:17:09,653
- God.
What was he so hung up about?

426
00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:11,363
Just think,
all of that free love

427
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:12,865
out there for the taking,
and somehow,

428
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,575
I thought I would have
to pay for it.

429
00:17:14,658 --> 00:17:15,701
- Sorry I'm late.

430
00:17:15,784 --> 00:17:17,619
Pop's van broke down.

431
00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,496
- Oh, we're doing that.
- You brought your dad?

432
00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:22,332
- Both my parents.
They're super proud of me.

433
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:24,001
I'm the first person
in my family

434
00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:25,669
to attend a press conference.

435
00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:27,546
- Hey, it's time.

436
00:17:27,629 --> 00:17:29,006
- Don't be nervous.
We did the work.

437
00:17:29,089 --> 00:17:31,300
You're gonna do great.
- I'm not nervous.

438
00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:34,136
For the first time, maybe ever,
I know exactly what I want.

439
00:17:34,219 --> 00:17:35,345
- Well, great.
Use that.

440
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:37,556
- It's you.
- What?

441
00:17:37,639 --> 00:17:40,267
- You're, like,
the sexiest teacher ever,

442
00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:43,812
except not married,
and, also, I'm of age now.

443
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,482
- No. Okay. No, hold on.
We were just having fun.

444
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:50,444
- Yeah, that's how it started--
with a spark.

445
00:17:50,527 --> 00:17:52,321
But what's love
without a spark?

446
00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:55,616
[applause]

447
00:17:55,699 --> 00:17:56,825
[flashes popping]

448
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:59,328
- [breathing heavily]

449
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:02,289
[high-pitched ringing]

450
00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:10,506
[mic feedback whines]

451
00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:17,638
- [distantly]
Uh, "Minx" is a--

452
00:18:17,721 --> 00:18:20,015
Oh, "Minx" will establish

453
00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:23,310
the female gaze, uh...

454
00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:26,897
[feedback whines]

455
00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:29,358
We are
at the exciting intersection

456
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:32,945
of feminism and erotica.

457
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,534
[normal voice]
Any questions?

458
00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:45,624
Okay, uh...

459
00:18:45,707 --> 00:18:48,961
I would like to introduce
Shane Brody.

460
00:18:49,044 --> 00:18:52,047
Shane was selected
out of countless applicants

461
00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:54,258
because he was the minxiest.

462
00:18:54,341 --> 00:18:56,301
He is a modern man.

463
00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,512
He's a supporter
of our mission,

464
00:18:58,595 --> 00:18:59,888
and he's also--

465
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:02,391
- A certified piece
of Grade-A man-meat.

466
00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:05,936
- Ank-you-thay.
[laughter]

467
00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:09,898
- Yeah, for Shane, tell us
what you really had to do

468
00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:10,899
to get the job.

469
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,901
- I guess impress the boss.

470
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:15,279
- [laughs nervously]

471
00:19:15,362 --> 00:19:17,239
- Has your mother
seen your debut?

472
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:19,074
- Ask her yourself.
She's right there.

473
00:19:19,157 --> 00:19:21,535
Love you, Mom.
- I love you too.

474
00:19:21,618 --> 00:19:23,161
- That's my boy.

475
00:19:23,245 --> 00:19:25,080
- Okay.
Let's just pivot back to the--

476
00:19:25,163 --> 00:19:27,082
- What are your turn-ons?
- Turn-offs?

477
00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:29,293
- What's your sign, honey?

478
00:19:29,376 --> 00:19:31,461
- Tell us
about your ideal woman.

479
00:19:31,545 --> 00:19:34,548
- Yeah, are you single?
Is there a Mrs. Man-Meat?

480
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:42,639
- Yeah, I do have a new lady.
- Oh, no.

481
00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:45,601
- She's smart, classy, strong.

482
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:47,519
She could probably lift
anyone in here.

483
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:48,729
- It's happening.

484
00:19:48,812 --> 00:19:52,941
- She's patient, proper,
a teacher,

485
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,860
and she doesn't
have to dress sexy

486
00:19:54,943 --> 00:19:57,446
'cause she already is.

487
00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:00,282
- Oh, my God.
Shane's in love with Joyce.

488
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:02,284
- Oh, and she knows
how to have just fun,

489
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:05,454
which is, like,
a more pure kind of fun

490
00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:07,414
'cause you're falling in love.

491
00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,000
Oh, and when we did it
in the bathroom

492
00:20:10,083 --> 00:20:11,627
at the Tony Pony, I realized--

493
00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:13,337
- That no one has asked us
a single question

494
00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:14,963
about this
very carefully researched

495
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,256
and thoughtful magazine.

496
00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:18,550
So does anyone have a question?

497
00:20:20,719 --> 00:20:23,013
- [coughs]

498
00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:26,516
- Yeah.

499
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:29,978
Glenn Hollingsworth,
"Lad" magazine.

500
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:33,982
- Glenn, you have a question.

501
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:35,442
- I do.

502
00:20:37,235 --> 00:20:39,154
What do you say to all
the female readers out there

503
00:20:39,237 --> 00:20:40,530
who might be curious
about "Minx"

504
00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:43,075
but are also intimidated
by its content?

505
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:48,163
- Thank you, Glenn.
That's a great question.

506
00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:52,501
Uh, well--

507
00:20:52,584 --> 00:20:53,543
Thank you so much.

508
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:56,046
- Thanks, Joyce.
- Yeah.

509
00:20:56,129 --> 00:21:00,008
I owe you something big.

510
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:02,219
- These can be brutal.
- Yeah.

511
00:21:02,302 --> 00:21:04,012
- A little softball never hurt.

512
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,681
The magazine looks great.

513
00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:08,016
It really does.
Congratulations.

514
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,560
- Thank you.
It means a lot.

515
00:21:10,644 --> 00:21:12,604
- Maybe we can do
lunch sometime.

516
00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:13,730
- Sure. Why not?

517
00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:15,065
But not at the club.

518
00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:16,775
- Yeah, no,
you're banned for life.

519
00:21:16,858 --> 00:21:18,151
They put your picture up front.

520
00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:19,736
- They did?
Like--who's that guy?

521
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:21,530
That guy that streaked
the tennis tournament?

522
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:23,115
- Stu.
- Stu. Stu, yeah.

523
00:21:23,198 --> 00:21:24,533
- Hey.
- Oh, God.

524
00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:25,993
- You trying to steal my girl?

525
00:21:26,076 --> 00:21:27,661
[laughs]
Woman.

526
00:21:27,744 --> 00:21:29,997
Liberated woman
who cannot be stolen

527
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:31,164
and is not property.

528
00:21:31,248 --> 00:21:32,958
- That's right.

529
00:21:34,793 --> 00:21:38,213
- Well, um, I'll call you.

530
00:21:38,296 --> 00:21:40,716
Okay?
- Mm-hmm.

531
00:21:40,799 --> 00:21:42,217
- We're going
to Marie Callender's.

532
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:43,885
- We?

533
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:44,886
- Hi.

534
00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:46,555
- They want to meet you.

535
00:21:46,638 --> 00:21:49,266
Get to know you like I do,
but not have sex.

536
00:21:49,349 --> 00:21:50,517
- Okay.
No, stop.

537
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,853
All right, I think we need to--

538
00:21:52,936 --> 00:21:54,813
There's been
a misunderstanding here, okay?

539
00:21:54,896 --> 00:21:58,567
'Cause this isn't real.
We're not a couple.

540
00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:00,110
It's not appropriate for me

541
00:22:00,193 --> 00:22:02,779
to meet your very
enthusiastic parents, okay?

542
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:06,616
It was just sex.
It was just casual sex.

543
00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:09,286
That's what "just fun" means.

544
00:22:09,369 --> 00:22:11,913
- So you used me.

545
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:14,541
- [scoffs]
We were using each other,

546
00:22:14,624 --> 00:22:16,251
in a good way, for pleasure.

547
00:22:16,334 --> 00:22:18,628
- Don't tell me
what I was doing.

548
00:22:18,712 --> 00:22:22,299
You say everyone deserves
their own voice, right?

549
00:22:22,382 --> 00:22:24,092
Or am I just some
pretty little thing to you?

550
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:26,011
- Okay. All right. Okay.
I see what you're doing.

551
00:22:26,094 --> 00:22:29,473
But that--no, that's not this,
because you're just someone

552
00:22:29,556 --> 00:22:32,851
who technically works for me

553
00:22:32,934 --> 00:22:36,146
who I then had sex with.

554
00:22:36,229 --> 00:22:38,106
- I trusted you.
- Shane.

555
00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:40,942
- I gave you my penis,
and I want it back.

556
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:42,319
- Hmm?

557
00:22:42,402 --> 00:22:44,780
- I don't want to be
in your magazine anymore.

558
00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:56,166
- [clapping]
[chuckles]

559
00:22:56,249 --> 00:22:57,626
Madam editor.

560
00:22:57,709 --> 00:23:01,171
It was a little shaky at first,
and then boom.

561
00:23:01,254 --> 00:23:03,298
- Save it.
Shane's pulled out.

562
00:23:03,381 --> 00:23:04,966
I broke
his simple little heart.

563
00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:06,968
- Well, I'm sorry,
but he signed the contract,

564
00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:09,596
which means we own the photos,
so we're publishing them,

565
00:23:09,679 --> 00:23:11,515
and there's nothing
that he can do about it.

566
00:23:11,598 --> 00:23:13,058
Though, what did I say?

567
00:23:13,141 --> 00:23:14,935
- Oh, God, you love
a Pyrrhic victory.

568
00:23:15,018 --> 00:23:17,229
- I don't know what that means,
so it doesn't hurt my feelings.

569
00:23:17,312 --> 00:23:20,107
- Doug, we cannot publish
naked photos of Shane

570
00:23:20,190 --> 00:23:21,525
without his permission.

571
00:23:21,608 --> 00:23:23,568
I mean, yeah, fine,
we're legally allowed to,

572
00:23:23,652 --> 00:23:25,862
but what kind of message
does that send?

573
00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:27,823
- It would send the message
that we're good at business.

574
00:23:27,906 --> 00:23:29,199
Look, this is hardly
the first time

575
00:23:29,282 --> 00:23:30,700
a model has gotten cold feet.

576
00:23:30,784 --> 00:23:32,202
- Yeah, but we have
to be better than that.

577
00:23:32,285 --> 00:23:33,662
We have to.
In fact, I insist

578
00:23:33,745 --> 00:23:35,413
on holding us
to a higher standard.

579
00:23:35,497 --> 00:23:37,624
- Listen to you.
"A higher standard."

580
00:23:37,707 --> 00:23:40,460
Because you couldn't keep
your vag in your pants.

581
00:23:40,544 --> 00:23:42,087
- Do you always have to be
so crass?

582
00:23:42,170 --> 00:23:44,256
- All right, Joyce, I'm gonna
give it to you straight.

583
00:23:44,339 --> 00:23:46,299
The magazine is printed.

584
00:23:46,383 --> 00:23:48,218
And I spent more on this rag

585
00:23:48,301 --> 00:23:50,887
than anything
that I have ever done.

586
00:23:50,971 --> 00:23:54,850
I upped our print run
to 500,000

587
00:23:54,933 --> 00:23:59,729
at the last minute
against the advice of everyone.

588
00:23:59,813 --> 00:24:01,273
[scoffs]

589
00:24:01,356 --> 00:24:05,068
If I were to pull this issue,

590
00:24:05,152 --> 00:24:07,904
we'd be done.

591
00:24:07,988 --> 00:24:10,699
And I would be in a hole

592
00:24:10,782 --> 00:24:13,994
so goddamn deep

593
00:24:14,077 --> 00:24:17,497
that it would take me years
to climb out of.

594
00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:21,710
So...

595
00:24:21,793 --> 00:24:25,672
get okay with this or fix it.

596
00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:33,889
[door slams]

597
00:24:33,972 --> 00:24:36,892
[upbeat music]

598
00:24:36,975 --> 00:24:43,481
♪ ♪

599
00:24:43,565 --> 00:24:45,066
- Résumés
for Gerry's replacement.

600
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:47,277
- I thought we only
fired people on Fridays.

601
00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:49,404
- You've never fired anyone.

602
00:24:51,656 --> 00:24:52,991
- All right.

603
00:24:53,074 --> 00:25:00,165
♪ ♪

604
00:25:06,463 --> 00:25:07,923
This is insane.

605
00:25:08,006 --> 00:25:09,507
Can I talk to you?

606
00:25:16,056 --> 00:25:17,557
I took the money.

607
00:25:19,559 --> 00:25:20,936
But you already knew that.

608
00:25:21,019 --> 00:25:23,104
- A bunch of transfers
between off-cycle titles

609
00:25:23,188 --> 00:25:25,815
at the same time as a surprise
invoice from the printer?

610
00:25:25,899 --> 00:25:28,401
That shit may fool Gerry--
- I knew you wouldn't approve.

611
00:25:28,485 --> 00:25:30,153
- Your pet project
is bleeding us dry,

612
00:25:30,237 --> 00:25:32,072
and now you're stealing from
yourself to hide it from me?

613
00:25:32,155 --> 00:25:34,074
- Okay, maybe I just didn't
want you looking at me

614
00:25:34,157 --> 00:25:36,868
the way you are
looking at me right now.

615
00:25:36,952 --> 00:25:38,912
I changed the plan, Tina.

616
00:25:38,995 --> 00:25:41,164
I am sorry.
- That's a start.

617
00:25:41,248 --> 00:25:43,959
- We both know what you mean
to this place.

618
00:25:44,042 --> 00:25:46,378
You are the other half
of Bottom Dollar.

619
00:25:46,461 --> 00:25:49,506
I just--I need you
to trust me on this one.

620
00:25:49,589 --> 00:25:51,216
Push down those business smarts

621
00:25:51,299 --> 00:25:55,971
that I fucking love about you
and trust me.

622
00:25:57,597 --> 00:25:58,932
- You know how hard it is

623
00:25:59,015 --> 00:26:01,810
to see a burning building
and not yell fire?

624
00:26:01,893 --> 00:26:04,479
- Well, maybe it's not on fire.

625
00:26:04,562 --> 00:26:07,565
Maybe it's just hot
and uncomfortable.

626
00:26:13,446 --> 00:26:16,241
- Is this where you come
to think?

627
00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:21,788
- No, this is my job.

628
00:26:23,915 --> 00:26:25,834
What are you doing here?

629
00:26:25,917 --> 00:26:27,085
- I wanted to talk to you.

630
00:26:27,168 --> 00:26:28,545
- Better make it fast,

631
00:26:28,628 --> 00:26:31,423
'cause if there's a fire,
I'm gonna have to go.

632
00:26:33,591 --> 00:26:36,553
- I think "Minx" is

633
00:26:36,636 --> 00:26:38,680
a tremendous opportunity
for you.

634
00:26:38,763 --> 00:26:41,349
And I know
that we haven't talked much

635
00:26:41,433 --> 00:26:43,852
about your hopes and dreams,

636
00:26:43,935 --> 00:26:46,813
but modeling can open
a lot of doors.

637
00:26:49,691 --> 00:26:51,860
More modeling.

638
00:26:51,943 --> 00:26:54,070
Acting.

639
00:26:54,154 --> 00:26:56,031
You could be a star.
[chuckles]

640
00:26:56,114 --> 00:26:58,283
- I don't want to be a star.

641
00:26:58,366 --> 00:27:01,536
I wanted 400 bucks and to show
my dick to the world.

642
00:27:01,619 --> 00:27:03,496
- All right, well, I was hoping
it wouldn't come to this,

643
00:27:03,580 --> 00:27:04,789
but you signed a contract,

644
00:27:04,873 --> 00:27:06,458
and Bottom Dollar owns
your photos,

645
00:27:06,541 --> 00:27:09,377
so there's nothing either one
of us can do about it.

646
00:27:09,461 --> 00:27:10,712
- Wow.

647
00:27:10,795 --> 00:27:13,173
So after all that
feminist stuff,

648
00:27:13,256 --> 00:27:15,467
it just comes down
to a piece of paper?

649
00:27:15,550 --> 00:27:17,844
- Yes, Shane.

650
00:27:17,927 --> 00:27:20,138
This is business.

651
00:27:20,221 --> 00:27:24,726
And I am here on business
and business only.

652
00:27:24,809 --> 00:27:27,479
Um...

653
00:27:27,562 --> 00:27:30,857
God, you're the fourth guy
that I have ever slept with

654
00:27:30,940 --> 00:27:32,567
and the only one
who wasn't my boyfriend

655
00:27:32,650 --> 00:27:34,819
and by far the best,

656
00:27:34,903 --> 00:27:37,572
but that has more to do
with my relationship

657
00:27:37,655 --> 00:27:42,285
to my own body, I think,
but still, it was, um, uh...

658
00:27:47,749 --> 00:27:48,958
You were more into me

659
00:27:49,042 --> 00:27:52,003
than I was into you,
and I knew that.

660
00:27:52,087 --> 00:27:54,297
I should have been
more careful.

661
00:27:55,465 --> 00:27:57,217
I just wanted
to feel good again,

662
00:27:57,300 --> 00:27:59,928
so I pushed away all reason,

663
00:28:00,011 --> 00:28:04,099
and that was really selfish.

664
00:28:04,182 --> 00:28:05,683
It's so irresponsible.

665
00:28:05,767 --> 00:28:07,477
- You could have said hi
to my parents.

666
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:09,896
- Yes, I should have.

667
00:28:14,692 --> 00:28:16,611
If you don't want to be
in "Minx,"

668
00:28:16,694 --> 00:28:20,907
then I will figure out
a way of killing the issue,

669
00:28:20,990 --> 00:28:24,119
no matter the consequences.

670
00:28:24,202 --> 00:28:26,371
You deserve to have a voice.

671
00:28:39,676 --> 00:28:42,387
- ♪ I don't care
what they say ♪

672
00:28:42,470 --> 00:28:43,972
- Nice work.

673
00:28:44,055 --> 00:28:45,974
And you got some
in the process.

674
00:28:46,057 --> 00:28:47,600
[chuckles]

675
00:28:49,227 --> 00:28:51,521
Let me know if you need help.

676
00:28:51,604 --> 00:28:53,148
- Thank you, Tina.

677
00:28:53,231 --> 00:28:55,316
- ♪ Can't you see
I live for your touch? ♪

678
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:57,986
♪ Because I believe in you ♪

679
00:28:58,069 --> 00:29:00,738
♪ What else can I say? ♪

680
00:29:00,822 --> 00:29:04,325
♪ I believe in you, girl ♪

681
00:29:04,409 --> 00:29:08,037
♪ If I'm trying to be,
go on your way ♪

682
00:29:08,121 --> 00:29:10,290
- 22 inches.
- Brown trout?

683
00:29:10,373 --> 00:29:11,666
- Rainbow.
- Shut up.

684
00:29:11,749 --> 00:29:13,042
[laughter]

685
00:29:13,126 --> 00:29:16,546
- Well, if it isn't Mr. August.

686
00:29:16,629 --> 00:29:19,507
- More like Mrs. August.
[laughter]

687
00:29:19,591 --> 00:29:20,842
- His dick's so fancy,

688
00:29:20,925 --> 00:29:22,510
it probably can't even get
wet anymore.

689
00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,596
[laughter]

690
00:29:24,679 --> 00:29:26,181
- You guys can all laugh,

691
00:29:26,264 --> 00:29:28,391
but I'm the one
that feels bad for you.

692
00:29:30,435 --> 00:29:32,020
You're victims,

693
00:29:32,103 --> 00:29:35,565
victims of something
called the patri-archie.

694
00:29:37,609 --> 00:29:40,028
[scoffs]
Someday, you'll understand.

695
00:29:40,111 --> 00:29:41,696
- ♪ You and I ♪

696
00:29:41,779 --> 00:29:45,074
♪ Travel to the beat
of a different drum ♪

697
00:29:45,158 --> 00:29:49,370
♪ Ah, can't you tell
by the way I run ♪

698
00:29:49,454 --> 00:29:53,500
♪ Every time
you make eyes at me ♪

699
00:29:53,583 --> 00:29:55,543
♪ Whoa ♪

700
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:57,879
♪ You cry and moan ♪

701
00:29:57,962 --> 00:30:01,049
♪ And say it will work out ♪

702
00:30:01,132 --> 00:30:04,928
♪ But, honey child,
I've got my doubts ♪

703
00:30:05,011 --> 00:30:09,891
♪ You can't see the forest
for the trees ♪

704
00:30:09,974 --> 00:30:12,852
♪ So don't get me wrong ♪

705
00:30:12,936 --> 00:30:14,896
♪ It's not that I knock it ♪

706
00:30:14,979 --> 00:30:16,898
♪ It's just that I ♪

707
00:30:16,981 --> 00:30:18,608
♪ I'm not in the market ♪

708
00:30:18,691 --> 00:30:22,403
♪ For a boy who wants
to love ♪

709
00:30:22,487 --> 00:30:25,907
♪ Only me ♪

710
00:30:25,990 --> 00:30:28,826
♪ Yes, and I ain't saying ♪

711
00:30:28,910 --> 00:30:30,578
♪ You ain't pretty ♪

712
00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:34,415
♪ All I'm saying's
I'm not ready ♪

713
00:30:34,499 --> 00:30:38,503
♪ For any person,
place, or thing ♪

714
00:30:38,586 --> 00:30:41,798
♪ To try and pull the reins ♪

715
00:30:41,881 --> 00:30:44,425
♪ In on me ♪

716
00:30:44,509 --> 00:30:48,346
♪ So goodbye ♪

717
00:30:48,429 --> 00:30:49,973
♪ I'll be leaving ♪

718
00:30:50,056 --> 00:30:52,350
♪ I see no sense ♪

719
00:30:52,433 --> 00:30:53,977
♪ In this crying
and grieving ♪

720
00:30:54,060 --> 00:30:56,437
♪ We'll both live
a lot longer ♪

721
00:30:56,521 --> 00:31:00,817
♪ If you live without me ♪

722
00:31:00,900 --> 00:31:03,361
♪ ♪

