1
00:00:12,221 --> 00:00:16,100
[title music]

2
00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:38,247
[Charlie] Okay. So the extermination
is coming in six months instead of a year.

3
00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:41,375
No big deal.
Just a little setback.

4
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,085
Nothing we can't handle.

5
00:00:43,085 --> 00:00:44,795
Just angels cutting
our timetable in half.

6
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:46,630
But who needs a whole year
to save souls?

7
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,424
[manically] Am I right?
And next time,

8
00:00:48,424 --> 00:00:50,176
when they cut the
time in half again and again,

9
00:00:50,176 --> 00:00:51,552
we'll just handle it, right?!

10
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:53,721
[Vaggie] Yes, we will.

11
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:57,433
[Angel] Oh, please, ya had less
than half a chance when you started

12
00:00:57,433 --> 00:01:00,102
all this salvation bullshit.

13
00:01:00,102 --> 00:01:03,439
And now... Ain't no silver
lining this time toots.

14
00:01:03,439 --> 00:01:07,735
Sure there is. We just have to
look a little harder for it.

15
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:11,655
Well, while you're lookin,
the rest of Hell is going nuts.

16
00:01:11,655 --> 00:01:14,492
People are already freaking out
about the news.

17
00:01:14,492 --> 00:01:17,453
Look at what's happening in the
Doomsday District.

18
00:01:17,453 --> 00:01:19,622
Err, what is
a "donkey show"?

19
00:01:19,622 --> 00:01:24,668
Aah, heh, nothing. My boss, Val,
is just freaked out about the news, too.

20
00:01:24,668 --> 00:01:26,629
Like I said,
everyone's losing their shit.

21
00:01:26,629 --> 00:01:30,883
Yeah, that's true.
Sinners are desperate.

22
00:01:30,883 --> 00:01:35,638
Maybe desperate enough to try
anything to escape the extermination?

23
00:01:35,638 --> 00:01:41,894
[gasps] This is the perfect time
to recruit more sinners for the hotel!

24
00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:45,439
Cute idea and all,
but you really going to go out in all of this?

25
00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:48,359
Well, it's not like people are
just going to show up on our doorstep.

26
00:01:48,359 --> 00:01:50,235
-[explosion]
-[screams]

27
00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:53,280
[Sir Pentious dramatically]
Show yourself, Alastor!

28
00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:56,283
[epic music]
Come and face--

29
00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:57,576
Oh, there you are...

30
00:01:57,576 --> 00:01:59,912
[shouts]
Face my wrath!

31
00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:01,247
Who are you?

32
00:02:01,247 --> 00:02:04,500
Who am I?
Who am I?

33
00:02:04,500 --> 00:02:11,507
I am the great Sir Pentious! Inventor,
architect of destruction,

34
00:02:11,507 --> 00:02:14,301
villain extraordinaire!

35
00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:16,804
Woo! You tell 'em, boss.

36
00:02:16,804 --> 00:02:20,349
[Niffty gasps]
Ooh, he's a bad boy.

37
00:02:20,349 --> 00:02:22,685
Huh, well if all that's true,
you'd think I'd have heard of you.

38
00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:25,353
I attacked
you literally last week.

39
00:02:25,353 --> 00:02:28,732
We've done battle, like... 20
times.

40
00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,610
Well, you must have been
really bad at this.

41
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:33,946
Silence! Now cower!

42
00:02:33,946 --> 00:02:38,284
[hisses] For when I've
slain you, the almighty Vees

43
00:02:38,284 --> 00:02:41,537
will finally acknowledge me
as their equal!

44
00:02:41,537 --> 00:02:44,373
[Niffty]
Ooh! Wait, who are the Vees?

45
00:02:44,373 --> 00:02:46,458
Oh, nobody important.

46
00:02:48,878 --> 00:02:50,880
[TV announcer] New VoxTek
designer voyeur scopes.

47
00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:53,924
Peeping on the neighbors
has never been more stylish.

48
00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:56,552
VoxTek.
Trust us with your money.

49
00:02:56,552 --> 00:02:59,805
This week's episode of "Yeah
I Fucked Your Sister So What?"

50
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:01,765
is brought to you by VoxTek.

51
00:03:01,765 --> 00:03:03,851
Trust us with
your entertainment.

52
00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:06,312
VoxTek.
Trust us.

53
00:03:06,312 --> 00:03:10,232
Trust us. Trust us.
Trust us. Trust us. Trust us ...

54
00:03:10,232 --> 00:03:12,526
[maniacal laughing]
Now that's good television...

55
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:15,237
-[static interference]
-[horn hoots]

56
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:16,989
[electronic dance music]

57
00:03:16,989 --> 00:03:19,909
Hello there, Velvette. How
are you this hellish morning?

58
00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:22,244
Oh, cut the shit, Vox.
I need you up here now!

59
00:03:22,244 --> 00:03:24,704
Whatever could be
the problem my dear?

60
00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:27,583
Your little boy toy is wrecking
my department

61
00:03:27,583 --> 00:03:29,668
while I ' m trying to pull
together a show and--

62
00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:31,253
[Valentino] Fucking bitch!

63
00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:33,297
Just get your ass here. Now!

64
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:36,383
Dammit Valentino!
[static]

65
00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,803
[sighs] Oh god,
here I go. Valentino.

66
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,555
Just another fuckin day
with Val.

67
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:43,682
Hey, hey, hey.
Fuck my life.

68
00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:44,892
[lift crackles]

69
00:03:47,853 --> 00:03:49,688
[clamoring]
[reporters] Mr Vox! Mr Vox!

70
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:53,442
[reporter] Mr. Vox, question
for you over here. Mr Vox

71
00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:56,445
Mr. Vox. What are your thoughts
on the new extermination deadline?

72
00:03:56,445 --> 00:04:01,283
My dear people, we at VoxTek
Enterprises have always been

73
00:04:01,283 --> 00:04:03,869
at the forefront of innovation.

74
00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:09,458
And now with this new
oncoming threat, we are shifting our focus

75
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:12,336
to your protection.

76
00:04:12,336 --> 00:04:17,466
We are pleased to announce
VoxTek Angelic Security is coming soon.

77
00:04:17,466 --> 00:04:22,596
Trust us with your safety.
[chuckles]

78
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:27,518
Sir? Uh, when did we begin
working on Angelic Security?

79
00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:30,771
[Vox] 30 seconds ago. Try to
get that bitch Carmilla on the books

80
00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,648
and cancel all my
appointments today.

81
00:04:32,648 --> 00:04:34,692
I have a fire
to put out upstairs.

82
00:04:34,692 --> 00:04:36,485
[static sparks]

83
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:39,571
[light electronic dance music]

84
00:04:39,571 --> 00:04:43,325
[Velvette] Ugh. No.
Unacceptable. You're fired.

85
00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:47,871
What is this? Wrist ruffles?
Is it 1750?

86
00:04:47,871 --> 00:04:49,915
Burn it like the witches
who wore it.

87
00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:52,334
[Vox] Oh, Velvet.
I can see you're busy.

88
00:04:52,334 --> 00:04:54,545
Tell me where's our hot
headed friend now?

89
00:04:54,545 --> 00:04:59,049
Up in his tower, waiting for
a flat-faced prince to calm him down.

90
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:04,346
[sighs] And uh, what's got him
so out of sorts today?

91
00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:07,516
Who knows?
But he tore up my best model.

92
00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:10,352
And you know, the show can't
wait for that unlucky bitch

93
00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,021
to pull herself back together.

94
00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:14,356
Melissa, get over here.

95
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:15,983
No. No. Hideous.

96
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:18,360
I want to die. Eww.
Oh, yes. That's the one.

97
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,112
Well, looks like you have
everything under control here.

98
00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:22,573
Of course I do.
Fuck you. Now shoo!

99
00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:24,825
Take care of the piss baby.

100
00:05:25,451 --> 00:05:27,828
[gentle music]

101
00:05:29,455 --> 00:05:30,831
[door closes]

102
00:05:31,749 --> 00:05:34,001
[ominous music]

103
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[Valentino] Fuckin' finally,

104
00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:38,464
[glass smashes]
Kitty, another drink.

105
00:05:38,464 --> 00:05:40,632
Can you believe what
that piece of shit did?

106
00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:43,552
The ungrateful whore!
[glass smashes]

107
00:05:43,552 --> 00:05:45,387
Um which whore are
we talking about this time?

108
00:05:45,387 --> 00:05:47,056
Fucking Angel Dust.

109
00:05:47,056 --> 00:05:49,475
Who the hell else
would I be talking about?

110
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:53,437
That fucking slut
walked out on me. Me.

111
00:05:53,437 --> 00:05:54,897
I fucking made him.

112
00:05:54,897 --> 00:05:56,732
Without me, he's just a bag of
meat

113
00:05:56,732 --> 00:05:58,650
with some mildly
entertaining holes.

114
00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:01,612
-Angel quit?
-No, he didn't fucking quit.

115
00:06:01,612 --> 00:06:04,615
It's worse. He moved!

116
00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:08,535
He thinks he can just walk in here,
work, and then go home somewhere else.

117
00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:10,120
Can you fucking believe that?!

118
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,872
He thinks he can run off

119
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:13,916
and shack up with Lucifer's
bimbo daughter?

120
00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:16,752
Angel is living with
Lucifer's daughter now?

121
00:06:16,752 --> 00:06:19,463
Yeah, that bitch. Chalkie,
or Chandler, or...

122
00:06:19,463 --> 00:06:20,589
I don't know.
Something mannish like that.

123
00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:22,091
She's got this hotel and--

124
00:06:22,091 --> 00:06:24,134
And which of these makes me
look sexier?

125
00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:26,095
[Vox chuckles]
What are you doing, Val?

126
00:06:26,095 --> 00:06:28,097
You're not going over there.

127
00:06:28,097 --> 00:06:31,600
That slippery twink is
going to remember who owns him.

128
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:34,937
I'm going to fuck everyone in
that rancid shithole, I swear to God.

129
00:06:34,937 --> 00:06:37,981
[shouts] Val!
[chuckles] Think about it.

130
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:40,484
Our brand is perfection.

131
00:06:40,484 --> 00:06:42,694
And what do you think
chasing whores around town

132
00:06:42,694 --> 00:06:44,196
will do for our image?

133
00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:46,657
Uh... Fuck it up?

134
00:06:46,657 --> 00:06:48,700
Right!
[cheering]

135
00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:51,787
Do you want people thinking you
can't control your employees?

136
00:06:51,787 --> 00:06:53,622
-No.
-Exactly.

137
00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:56,667
And, hey, you still have him
under contract.

138
00:06:56,667 --> 00:07:00,546
He isn't going anywhere.
So you should...?

139
00:07:00,963 --> 00:07:02,923
[Valentino] Do nothing?

140
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:06,760
Great idea. Now, that's
why they pay you the big bucks.

141
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,888
[sighs] But I really wanted
to shoot someone.

142
00:07:09,888 --> 00:07:12,724
Well, let me call up the lowest
earners this month.

143
00:07:12,724 --> 00:07:16,937
Oh, you know me too well.
[chuckles darkly]

144
00:07:19,565 --> 00:07:24,069
You know, Angel isn't the only
one spending time at this ratty hotel

145
00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:26,155
with the devil's princessa .

146
00:07:26,155 --> 00:07:28,949
[Vox] Oh, who else is there?
Someone who owes you money?

147
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:32,661
[chuckles] Someone who owes
us much more than money.

148
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:34,204
The Radio Demon is there.

149
00:07:34,204 --> 00:07:36,748
[tense music]

150
00:07:36,748 --> 00:07:38,750
[chuckles]
What did you just say?

151
00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:40,544
You heard me.

152
00:07:40,544 --> 00:07:45,048
Alastor came back and he is with
Lucifer's daughter,

153
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:49,052
[angrily] and that wasn't
the first fucking thing you told me?!

154
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:52,014
[Valentino] Hey, killing Alastor
is your kink.

155
00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:57,019
[Sir Pentious] Arrgh,
Oh! Please! Stop! [Alastor laughs]

156
00:07:57,019 --> 00:07:59,104
[Charlie] Um, Alastor?
I think he's had enough.

157
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:02,149
[Angel] Nah, he's got a few more
hits in im!

158
00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:04,026
[dramatic music]
[Sir Pentious] Aahhh!

159
00:08:04,026 --> 00:08:07,863
[Alastor] Thanks for
another forgettable experience.

160
00:08:08,572 --> 00:08:12,159
[Sit Pentious] Thank... you...
for letting your guard down!

161
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:14,494
Haha! Yah! Oh, shit.

162
00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:20,000
[Sir Pentious screams]
Argh!

163
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,794
Well, it looks as though
I need a visit to the tailor.

164
00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:24,713
Best of luck, chums.

165
00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:26,632
Wait. You're leaving?

166
00:08:26,632 --> 00:08:29,551
Alastor, we need your help.
We need you to do your job.

167
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:30,302
We need a wall.

168
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:32,221
Of course.

169
00:08:32,221 --> 00:08:34,890
Can't let my new project fall
into disrepair already.

170
00:08:34,890 --> 00:08:36,140
What would the papers say?

171
00:08:36,140 --> 00:08:39,852
[Angel giggles]

172
00:08:39,852 --> 00:08:42,563
Hey, sweet cheeks.
[laid back jazz]

173
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:43,982
What you doing later?

174
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:47,861
I love me a man with a giant...
tool.

175
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:50,072
[Valentino] See? Look,
at how he flirts with that guy,

176
00:08:50,072 --> 00:08:52,074
and he's not even paying.

177
00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:55,244
Who is that? I'm gonna fucking
kill his whole fucking family.

178
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:56,828
Vox? Vox?

179
00:08:56,828 --> 00:09:00,249
[static buzzes]
[ominous music]

180
00:09:00,249 --> 00:09:02,251
[dramatic music]
That fucker is back!

181
00:09:02,251 --> 00:09:04,670
Yeah, I thought he was gone
for good too.

182
00:09:04,670 --> 00:09:06,255
It's been seven years!

183
00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:09,007
You still pissed
he almost beat you that time?

184
00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:11,760
-Uh, fuck you.
-Just saying.

185
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,887
Things have changed a lot
since he left town.

186
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:15,180
[Valentino] That's for sure.

187
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:16,765
I got to send a message

188
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:19,017
of who's
really in charge of things now.

189
00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,602
[chuckles]

190
00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:23,146
[dramatic music]
♪ Welcome home ♪

191
00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:24,940
♪ I'm gonna make you wish ♪

192
00:09:24,940 --> 00:09:27,609
♪ That you'd stayed gone. ♪

193
00:09:27,609 --> 00:09:29,695
♪ Say hello ♪

194
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:32,322
♪ To a new status quo ♪

195
00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:36,660
♪ Everyone knows that there's
a brand new dawn ♪

196
00:09:36,660 --> 00:09:38,787
♪ Turn the TV on ♪

197
00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:43,625
[director]
Camera, speeds. Rolling in 3,2.

198
00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:46,003
[upbeat music]
♪ Welcome to the show ♪

199
00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,880
[Vox in newscaster voice] ♪ Top of the hour
and we're discussing a certain has-been ♪

200
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,133
♪ who has been spotted cavorting
around town after a seven year absence. ♪

201
00:09:51,133 --> 00:09:53,802
♪ Did anybody miss him? Did
anybody notice? More on tonight's program. ♪

202
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,804
♪ So the Radio Demon is back in
town. ♪

203
00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:58,098
♪ Why is he hanging around?
What does that mean for your family? ♪

204
00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,726
♪ Well handily, I've got
good news. He's a loser, a fossil ♪

205
00:10:00,726 --> 00:10:03,186
♪ And I don't mean to sound
hostile but the demon is a coward ♪

206
00:10:03,186 --> 00:10:05,731
♪ You can take that as gospel.
Pulling my viewers? Impossible ♪

207
00:10:05,731 --> 00:10:06,898
♪ Im visual,
he's barely audible ♪

208
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:07,941
♪ Stop giving
him the time of day ♪

209
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:09,818
♪ Don't listen to a word he'd
say

210
00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,111
♪ Hope he had a nice vacay ♪

211
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,362
♪ But he should have stayed away
♪

212
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:15,282
♪ While he hid in radio ♪

213
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,826
♪ We pivoted to video ♪

214
00:10:17,826 --> 00:10:19,911
♪ And now his medium ♪

215
00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:22,080
♪ is getting bloody rare ♪

216
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:25,083
♪ Hell's been
better since he split ♪

217
00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:26,668
♪ Where's he been? Who gives a
shit? ♪

218
00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:28,795
[Alastor]
♪ Salutations ♪

219
00:10:28,795 --> 00:10:31,340
♪ Good to be back on the air ♪

220
00:10:31,340 --> 00:10:34,092
♪ Yes I know It's been a while
since someone with style ♪

221
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,762
♪ Treated hell to a broadcast
Sinners rejoice ♪

222
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:37,929
[Vox] What a dated voice!

223
00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:41,016
-Instead of a clout chasing video podcast
-Come on!

224
00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:42,893
♪ Is Vox insecure pursuing
allure? ♪

225
00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,436
♪ Flitting between this fad
and that ♪

226
00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:45,896
- ♪ Is nothing working? ♪
- ♪ Ignore his chirping ♪

227
00:10:45,896 --> 00:10:47,064
♪ Every day he's
got a new format ♪

228
00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:49,274
[Vox]
♪ You're looking at the future ♪

229
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:50,567
♪ He's the shit
that comes before that ♪

230
00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:53,028
[Alastor] ♪ Is Vox as
strong as he purports ♪

231
00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:55,864
♪ Or is
it based on his support? ♪

232
00:10:55,864 --> 00:10:59,034
♪ He'd be powerless
without the other Vees ♪

233
00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:00,202
[Vox] Oh please.

234
00:11:00,202 --> 00:11:01,370
♪ And here's the sugar ♪

235
00:11:01,370 --> 00:11:02,996
♪ on the cream ♪

236
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:04,581
- ♪ He asked me to join his team ♪
-[Vox] Hold on!

237
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:08,377
♪ I said no and now he's pissy,
that's the tea ♪

238
00:11:08,377 --> 00:11:09,961
[glitches]
♪ You old timey prick ♪

239
00:11:09,961 --> 00:11:12,089
♪ I'll show you suffering ♪

240
00:11:12,089 --> 00:11:13,715
[Alastor]
♪ Uh oh, the TV is buffering ♪

241
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:17,052
[signal breaks up] ♪ I'll
destroy yoo-o-u-u you little-- ♪

242
00:11:17,052 --> 00:11:20,097
[Alastor] I'm afraid
you've lost your signal.

243
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:25,852
[dramatic music]

244
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:29,481
[Alastor]
♪ Lets begin ♪

245
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:35,904
♪ I'm gonna make you wish
that I'd stayed gone ♪

246
00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:38,490
♪ Tune on in ♪

247
00:11:38,490 --> 00:11:42,369
♪ When I'm done ♪

248
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:47,290
♪ Your status quo
Will know its race is run ♪

249
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:51,336
♪ Oh this will be fun ♪

250
00:11:52,504 --> 00:11:55,132
[Alastor laughing]

251
00:11:55,424 --> 00:11:57,968
Fuck!

252
00:11:57,968 --> 00:12:00,345
[light music]
We have a problem.

253
00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:03,890
Alastor is getting close
to Little Princess Morning Star.

254
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:07,436
So our main concern now is
ensuring that no deal is ever struck

255
00:12:07,436 --> 00:12:10,981
between Lucifer's brat
and that smiling freak.

256
00:12:10,981 --> 00:12:14,109
Well, how exactly
are we supposed to stop it?

257
00:12:14,109 --> 00:12:15,861
Put something inside them.

258
00:12:15,861 --> 00:12:17,946
That's how I get the bitches
to behave.

259
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:22,909
Well maybe someone on the inside
isn't such a bad idea.

260
00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:24,369
Do you think Angel would?

261
00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:27,164
That lanky prick
won't even return my calls.

262
00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:32,252
We need someone who Little Miss
Bleeding Heart would take in.

263
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:36,882
Someone pathetic, desperate,
with no direct ties to us.

264
00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:40,385
I employ every down on their
luck loser this side of hell.

265
00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:41,970
Who the fuck is left?

266
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:42,929
[Vox scoffs]

267
00:12:43,889 --> 00:12:47,476
[dramatic music]
I think I have just the one.

268
00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:50,937
[Charlie exhausted] Hmmph!

269
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:53,356
[Angel] So how'd it go?

270
00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:56,234
[sighs]
Not a single new recruit.

271
00:12:56,234 --> 00:12:59,029
Yeah. Well, who would want
to use their last days

272
00:12:59,029 --> 00:13:01,406
[banging on door]
not fucking and fighting?

273
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,536
Why, hello, my dear--

274
00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:08,163
[thud]

275
00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:09,331
[Sir Pentious]
Wait wait wait!

276
00:13:09,331 --> 00:13:12,083
I come in peace.

277
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:13,460
What are you doing here?

278
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:15,003
Vaggie what's the problem?
[gasps]

279
00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,838
Oh, hello again.

280
00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:19,341
I didn't come
looking for a fight. I uhh...

281
00:13:19,341 --> 00:13:22,177
I heard that you're
helping people.

282
00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:25,013
People who want to be better?

283
00:13:25,013 --> 00:13:27,015
[gasps]
You heard right.

284
00:13:27,015 --> 00:13:31,895
Welcome to our home of healing.
Our resort of restoration. Our--

285
00:13:31,895 --> 00:13:33,313
Are you fucking nuts?

286
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:35,148
This chump was trying to kill
us, like,

287
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:37,067
literally 6 hours ago.

288
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:40,529
And now you want to bring him
in here to live with us?

289
00:13:40,529 --> 00:13:42,113
Absolutely!

290
00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:43,907
This place is about
second chances.

291
00:13:43,907 --> 00:13:46,076
And who deserves one more than
this...

292
00:13:46,076 --> 00:13:51,873
slithery... slippery...
special little man.

293
00:13:51,873 --> 00:13:53,333
Aren't you're supposed
to protect this place?

294
00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:55,627
-[puppy dog noises]
[ Vaggie sighs]

295
00:13:55,627 --> 00:14:00,173
I... guess he's not much of a
threat without the war machine

296
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,509
or even with the war
machine.

297
00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:04,886
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank
you, thank you!

298
00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:08,306
Sir Pentious!
Welcome to the Hazbin hotel!

299
00:14:08,306 --> 00:14:13,228
Oh, no darling, thank you.
You won't regret this.

300
00:14:13,228 --> 00:14:16,106
Eh, I give you a week tops.

301
00:14:16,106 --> 00:14:21,570
[light music] So... this
is the bar and the bartender.

302
00:14:21,570 --> 00:14:23,530
This is the curtain,

303
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:26,449
and this is the new wall after
you broke the last one, heh,

304
00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:28,159
and, oh, this, this is--

305
00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:30,161
Babe, you don't have to show him
every detail.

306
00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:34,915
Sorry, I'm just so excited to
have our first real guest!

307
00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:37,085
Uh, what the hell am I then?

308
00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:40,422
Well, you're an important part
of our family here, Angel.

309
00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:43,174
But you, um, uh....

310
00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:45,927
[Vaggie] Constantly make us look
bad, sexually harass the staff,

311
00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:48,305
and have literally
never once tried to improve?

312
00:14:48,305 --> 00:14:53,476
What she means is, it's just nice
to have someone interested for once.

313
00:14:53,476 --> 00:14:55,520
[light music]

314
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,565
Over here we have our maid
Niffty.

315
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:01,276
[gasps]
The bad boy is back.

316
00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:03,069
[creepy whisper]
Never leave me again.

317
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,322
We're about eighty percent
sure she's harmless.

318
00:15:05,322 --> 00:15:07,073
And over here we have--

319
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:10,952
Oh, uh, Alastor, our gracious
Facility Manager!

320
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:15,290
You've met our newest guest,
Sir Pentious... Heh heh.

321
00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:18,460
Ah, yes. You're
the one who ruined my coat.

322
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:21,713
[sinisterly]
I definitely remember you now.

323
00:15:21,713 --> 00:15:23,632
[gulp]

324
00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:26,635
Well, I guess this is a great
time for your first lesson:

325
00:15:26,635 --> 00:15:27,636
[clears throat]

326
00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:30,096
"How to apologize".

327
00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,474
The first step to becoming a better
person is to admit when you are wrong,

328
00:15:32,474 --> 00:15:35,018
Why don't you give it a try?

329
00:15:35,018 --> 00:15:43,068
Yes, um... Mr, um, Radio Demon,
sir, please forgive me for attacking you

330
00:15:43,068 --> 00:15:47,238
and ruining your very
lovely coat... Um, here...

331
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:52,661
Oh-ho, not many people have
been able to take even this much off me.

332
00:15:52,661 --> 00:15:54,621
It must have
meant quite a lot to you.

333
00:15:54,621 --> 00:15:55,580
[ignites]

334
00:15:58,165 --> 00:15:59,125
[cat purrs]

335
00:15:59,668 --> 00:16:02,629
Now! With a new resident,

336
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:05,298
I think it's important
we all get to know each other,

337
00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:07,717
so we are going to play
a little game.

338
00:16:07,717 --> 00:16:09,552
Everyone, follow me.

339
00:16:10,387 --> 00:16:12,013
My name is Charlie.
[claps]

340
00:16:12,013 --> 00:16:14,182
I like to sing.
[claps]

341
00:16:14,182 --> 00:16:17,060
And when we get to know
each other, it's the greatest thing.

342
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,395
[claps]

343
00:16:18,395 --> 00:16:20,689
My name's Sir Pentious.
[claps]

344
00:16:20,689 --> 00:16:22,399
I like to build.
[claps]

345
00:16:22,399 --> 00:16:24,359
And despite my stupid Egg Bois,

346
00:16:24,359 --> 00:16:26,444
I think I'm very skilled.
[claps]

347
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,531
This is stupid.

348
00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:32,575
♪ This is not stupid it 's
just the game ♪

349
00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:37,414
♪ Sir Pentious did it well so
now please try to do the same ♪

350
00:16:37,414 --> 00:16:39,290
I am too sober for this.

351
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,376
Well, get used to it and
learn how to play.

352
00:16:41,376 --> 00:16:43,712
♪ This is going to be
your whole day ♪ [claps]

353
00:16:43,712 --> 00:16:45,463
[laidback jazz music]

354
00:16:45,463 --> 00:16:49,300
[Angel] "Oh I'm a bad man on the streets

355
00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:51,594
who never got enough hugs."

356
00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:55,724
"Now, where's an innocent kid I
can sell crack to?"

357
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,727
[Angel]
Wow. Who wrote this?

358
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,812
It's great, right?
Keep going.

359
00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:05,191
-"Hey you."
-Who, me?

360
00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:09,738
"Yeah, you look like a kid
who could use some devil's dandruff."

361
00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:11,614
[Angel]
Oh, for fuck's sake.

362
00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:15,702
Not me. I have
to go home and study.

363
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:19,998
"Come on kid,
it'll make you cool like me...

364
00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:22,416
The crack head!"

365
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:27,255
The only cool thing here
is to say no to drugs.

366
00:17:27,255 --> 00:17:29,424
Now, if you'll excuse me,

367
00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:34,429
I'm off to not have sexual
intercourse before marriage!

368
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:39,476
[fanfare sounds]
Yes! Oh, bravo, bravo!

369
00:17:39,476 --> 00:17:41,227
Wow, Pentious,

370
00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:43,605
at this rate you'll be redeemed
in no time.

371
00:17:43,605 --> 00:17:45,106
[melancholy music]

372
00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:47,442
[Angel]
I... I'm going to bed.

373
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,404
[Charlie] I am so
proud of you, Sir Pentious.

374
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,448
-That was amazing.
-Thank you.

375
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:54,574
-That was beautiful work today!
-[Sir Pentious] Thank you.

376
00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:58,077
You like me. You really like me!

377
00:17:59,204 --> 00:18:01,289
[grunts]

378
00:18:04,209 --> 00:18:05,460
[sighs]

379
00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:08,296
[voicemail beeps]
[Valentino] Angel, Baby, come home.

380
00:18:08,296 --> 00:18:13,343
It's not the same without
you here. I miss you, come back

381
00:18:13,343 --> 00:18:15,804
[shouting] Angel
you bitch, If you don't come home,

382
00:18:15,804 --> 00:18:18,640
You will be fucking greasy
truckers for the next year--

383
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,518
[Valentino] Hey,
amorcito, I didn't mean to yell,

384
00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:23,311
but you know how
crazy you make me f--

385
00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:25,313
[shouting]
You fuckin' slut!

386
00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:26,815
[Valentino being friendly]
Hey, Angie, about earlier--

387
00:18:26,815 --> 00:18:28,650
[shouting]
Kill your whole fucking fam--

388
00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:30,527
Work ' s really stressful--

389
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,487
[shouting] Little
cocksucking piece of shit--

390
00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:34,656
[ominous music] You actually
think you can change?

391
00:18:34,656 --> 00:18:38,201
-Addict trash like you doesn't change.
-[sigh]

392
00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:42,372
[Valentino] I'll
see you soon, baby.

393
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:46,501
Sorry. Not now, Fat Nuggets.
[oinks]

394
00:18:47,836 --> 00:18:49,337
[bottles clink]
[cork squeaks open]

395
00:18:49,337 --> 00:18:52,173
[gulps]

396
00:18:53,842 --> 00:18:55,468
Aah!

397
00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:56,636
Huh?

398
00:18:57,345 --> 00:19:00,223
[suspenseful music]

399
00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:01,808
[door creaks]

400
00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:04,310
[Angel]
You slippery little shit!

401
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:05,520
[screams]

402
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,730
You're working for the Vees?

403
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:11,234
I fucking knew there was
something shitty about you.

404
00:19:11,234 --> 00:19:14,279
[Sir Pentious] I don't
know what you're talking about...

405
00:19:14,279 --> 00:19:15,446
whorebug!

406
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:17,198
[growls]

407
00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:20,702
[frantic music]
[scuffles]

408
00:19:21,911 --> 00:19:24,664
[Sir Pentious] Get
your aggressively average body,

409
00:19:24,873 --> 00:19:26,499
off of me!

410
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:27,208
[Angel] Fuck!

411
00:19:27,208 --> 00:19:28,334
[hisses]

412
00:19:28,334 --> 00:19:30,169
[growls ]

413
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:35,216
[yawn]
[Charlie] What's going on?

414
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,886
[Angel]
This little bitch is a traitor!

415
00:19:37,886 --> 00:19:46,477
Preposterous, I would never
betray you. You... are my best friends!

416
00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:49,355
[Angel] Uh-uh,
Then explain this.

417
00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:51,983
[suspenseful music]

418
00:19:51,983 --> 00:19:54,736
Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort!

419
00:19:54,736 --> 00:19:58,448
S.O.S. Agent Pentious in
need of immediate evacuation!!

420
00:19:58,448 --> 00:20:01,743
[Vox] Pentious? ... Wait ...
You were caught?!

421
00:20:01,743 --> 00:20:03,953
[laughing] It hasn't even been
a day!

422
00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:06,706
Please, you've got
to get me out of here!

423
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:11,002
[Vox] I can't believe we thought
you could handle even something this simple.

424
00:20:11,002 --> 00:20:13,796
Do us a favor, if they don't
kill you,

425
00:20:13,796 --> 00:20:18,676
go ahead and do it yourself,
you miserable failure.

426
00:20:18,676 --> 00:20:20,553
I... I...

427
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:22,555
[sombre music]

428
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,891
Just make it quick, I guess.

429
00:20:25,475 --> 00:20:26,893
Not that I deserve it.

430
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,478
Gladly.

431
00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:31,272
Wait... Pentious?

432
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:34,525
[light ballad music]

433
00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:37,278
♪ It starts with sorry ♪

434
00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,865
♪ That's your foot
In the door ♪

435
00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:44,243
♪ One simple sorry ♪

436
00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:47,830
♪ Spoken
straight from your core ♪

437
00:20:48,498 --> 00:20:51,751
♪ The path to forgiveness ♪

438
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:54,462
♪ Is a twisting
trail of hearts ♪

439
00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:59,842
♪ But sorry is where it starts ♪

440
00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:01,803
[music builds]

441
00:21:01,803 --> 00:21:06,891
♪ Who could
forgive a dirtbag like me ♪

442
00:21:06,891 --> 00:21:12,939
♪ I don't deserve
your amnesty ♪

443
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:15,775
[Angel and Vaggie]
♪ Can ' t we just kill him ♪

444
00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:19,737
♪ Shoot him and
spill his blood ♪

445
00:21:19,737 --> 00:21:22,323
[Charlie] ♪ That's an option you could choose ♪

446
00:21:22,323 --> 00:21:24,450
[Angel and Vaggie]
♪ Works for us ♪

447
00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:28,663
♪ But who hasn't
Been in his shoes ♪

448
00:21:28,663 --> 00:21:31,708
♪ It starts with sorry ♪

449
00:21:31,708 --> 00:21:33,042
♪ Sorry ♪

450
00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:35,044
♪ Dig down deeper and say ♪

451
00:21:35,044 --> 00:21:37,088
♪ One sincere sorry ♪

452
00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:39,424
[Sir Pentious]
♪ I'm so sorry ♪

453
00:21:39,424 --> 00:21:41,759
[Charlie]
♪ And your journey's underway ♪

454
00:21:41,759 --> 00:21:44,554
[Charlie and Sir Pentious]
♪ It'll take time to cover ♪

455
00:21:44,554 --> 00:21:48,016
♪ Your vast multitude of sins ♪
♪ My vast multitude of sins ♪

456
00:21:48,016 --> 00:21:53,021
♪ But sorry is where it begins ♪

457
00:21:53,021 --> 00:21:57,859
♪ It starts with sorry ♪

458
00:21:57,859 --> 00:21:59,777
[Niffty]
I hated that song!

459
00:21:59,777 --> 00:22:03,614
Why are you so lame?
Not a bad boy.

460
00:22:03,614 --> 00:22:08,327
[happy sigh] Good first day.
Let's get some rest.

461
00:22:10,413 --> 00:22:14,083
[suspenseful music]

462
00:22:14,083 --> 00:22:16,002
[electronic static]
[Vox] What?!

463
00:22:16,002 --> 00:22:20,048
You'll have to try harder than
that next time, ol' pal.

464
00:22:20,048 --> 00:22:21,507
[Vox rages]
Aaaarrggghhhhh!!

465
00:22:21,507 --> 00:22:23,760
[Alastor laughs]

466
00:22:25,636 --> 00:22:30,058
[end credit music]